Lost, considering returning to Catholicism despite disagreeing with so much.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I won’t read all the pages.

I am a Jew who grew up surrounded by Catholics. Through their church, many of them found ways to be great people: kind, charitable, thoughtful, community oriented… that is all good. And the Catholic Church still runs a lot of programs that help people of all faiths.

I’d focus on that and not the admittedly awful bits. Find friends in church who want to use their faith to make lives better. You can find it.



So if someone in your community was molesting kids but also raised a lot of money for Children’s Hospital would you still support them? The good doesn’t outweigh the bad.


I think a better question is: If you learned that several doctors in your state were caught in fraud, and the state medical board didn’t take their licenses away, but just let him move on to another hospital: would you still take your sick self or sick child to a doctor who is licensed in that state? What if you know that they pay dues to the AMA that lobbies for causes you don’t personally believe in?


Bad analogy: If all the docs were general practitioners, or ob-gyns, or whatever, I'd stay away from that specialty and go to another kind of doctor. It's not like catholisicm is the only religion out there -- or even the only Christian religion.


Yes, but Christian faiths are not interchangeable. There are fundamental differences in what each believes. If a person just hops between them then it shows a lack of knowledge or disregard for the dogma.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I won’t read all the pages.

I am a Jew who grew up surrounded by Catholics. Through their church, many of them found ways to be great people: kind, charitable, thoughtful, community oriented… that is all good. And the Catholic Church still runs a lot of programs that help people of all faiths.

I’d focus on that and not the admittedly awful bits. Find friends in church who want to use their faith to make lives better. You can find it.



"awful bits" Seriously what is wrong with you.

I can assure you victims of the Church child abuse do not consider it "bits".

Try again I was the same as you. Grew up in a predominately Catholic area. Charitable, sure when they were beating up the Jews. Or morphed to Trump trains and Trump boat screamers. Yeah no, they are not nice, not charitable unless it suits them, and again CHILD ABUSE.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I won’t read all the pages.

I am a Jew who grew up surrounded by Catholics. Through their church, many of them found ways to be great people: kind, charitable, thoughtful, community oriented… that is all good. And the Catholic Church still runs a lot of programs that help people of all faiths.

I’d focus on that and not the admittedly awful bits. Find friends in church who want to use their faith to make lives better. You can find it.



So if someone in your community was molesting kids but also raised a lot of money for Children’s Hospital would you still support them? The good doesn’t outweigh the bad.


I think a better question is: If you learned that several doctors in your state were caught in fraud, and the state medical board didn’t take their licenses away, but just let him move on to another hospital: would you still take your sick self or sick child to a doctor who is licensed in that state? What if you know that they pay dues to the AMA that lobbies for causes you don’t personally believe in?



Bad analogy: If all the docs were general practitioners, or ob-gyns, or whatever, I'd stay away from that specialty and go to another kind of doctor. It's not like catholisicm is the only religion out there -- or even the only Christian religion.


Yes, but Christian faiths are not interchangeable. There are fundamental differences in what each believes. If a person just hops between them then it shows a lack of knowledge or disregard for the dogma.


Disagree -- some of the differences are not so great, and checking out various faiths (no hopping involved) is a good way to find out what the differences are and to determine what matters to you.

and it's simply your opinion about any "lack" or "disregard".
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Grew up Catholic, married in the church, though disagreed with some of the teachings (lack of science) of PreCana. Since then, the child abuse scandal happened, my brother got divorced, I support gay marriage, and I support a woman’s right to abortion. So I took an extended break from the religion because I disagreed with so many tenets that I felt like a fraud.

I miss mass and the contemplative nature of Sunday gathering. I did some research on finding a new religion that checks all my boxes and it’s basically Judaism and I don’t think I can convert.

I had a realization recently and am considering just going again. I don’t agree with several things but I feel like if I teach my kids why, snd I take it for what it’s worth, then I might be OK. I truly miss the feeling that I get from Sunday mass, and I don’t think there are better options.

Any thoughts?


I'm not the authority on conversion to Judaism, but I do know that the teachings of the Kabbalah are very inclusive, healing and peace driven.

It's derived from Judaism, but it teaches those who aren't Jewish as well as those who are.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I won’t read all the pages.

I am a Jew who grew up surrounded by Catholics. Through their church, many of them found ways to be great people: kind, charitable, thoughtful, community oriented… that is all good. And the Catholic Church still runs a lot of programs that help people of all faiths.

I’d focus on that and not the admittedly awful bits. Find friends in church who want to use their faith to make lives better. You can find it.



So if someone in your community was molesting kids but also raised a lot of money for Children’s Hospital would you still support them? The good doesn’t outweigh the bad.


I think a better question is: If you learned that several doctors in your state were caught in fraud, and the state medical board didn’t take their licenses away, but just let him move on to another hospital: would you still take your sick self or sick child to a doctor who is licensed in that state? What if you know that they pay dues to the AMA that lobbies for causes you don’t personally believe in?


Bad analogy: If all the docs were general practitioners, or ob-gyns, or whatever, I'd stay away from that specialty and go to another kind of doctor. It's not like catholisicm is the only religion out there -- or even the only Christian religion.


It’s a decent analogy. Only allopathic and osteopathic doctors (MDs and DOs) are regulated by the state medical board. You don’t have to go to them. You have other options if you get sick. You could go to a naturopathic or homeopathic doctor. Or you could get reike or any number of other things.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I won’t read all the pages.

I am a Jew who grew up surrounded by Catholics. Through their church, many of them found ways to be great people: kind, charitable, thoughtful, community oriented… that is all good. And the Catholic Church still runs a lot of programs that help people of all faiths.

I’d focus on that and not the admittedly awful bits. Find friends in church who want to use their faith to make lives better. You can find it.



So if someone in your community was molesting kids but also raised a lot of money for Children’s Hospital would you still support them? The good doesn’t outweigh the bad.


I think a better question is: If you learned that several doctors in your state were caught in fraud, and the state medical board didn’t take their licenses away, but just let him move on to another hospital: would you still take your sick self or sick child to a doctor who is licensed in that state? What if you know that they pay dues to the AMA that lobbies for causes you don’t personally believe in?


Bad analogy: If all the docs were general practitioners, or ob-gyns, or whatever, I'd stay away from that specialty and go to another kind of doctor. It's not like catholisicm is the only religion out there -- or even the only Christian religion.


It’s a decent analogy. Only allopathic and osteopathic doctors (MDs and DOs) are regulated by the state medical board. You don’t have to go to them. You have other options if you get sick. You could go to a naturopathic or homeopathic doctor. Or you could get reike or any number of other things.



So you agree with "Bad analogy" pp?
Anonymous
I feel the exact same as OP. But I’ll say- the church doesn’t want you back. Not the Arlington diocese. I was told not to attend or take communion because my kids weren’t baptized. I feel like at this point there are too many barriers for me to attend and I just can’t. I’m not sure why I can’t join by myself but they aren’t interested. I can go to mass, but can’t register or become a member. Can’t take communion.

I miss the church I grew up with.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I feel the exact same as OP. But I’ll say- the church doesn’t want you back. Not the Arlington diocese. I was told not to attend or take communion because my kids weren’t baptized. I feel like at this point there are too many barriers for me to attend and I just can’t. I’m not sure why I can’t join by myself but they aren’t interested. I can go to mass, but can’t register or become a member. Can’t take communion.

I miss the church I grew up with.


I feel like you got some really bad advice. How would you even baptize your children if you weren’t part of the church? That would be an unending circle! And your children’s baptism has no bearing on you receiving communion. Someone at that church needs a refresher!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I feel the exact same as OP. But I’ll say- the church doesn’t want you back. Not the Arlington diocese. I was told not to attend or take communion because my kids weren’t baptized. I feel like at this point there are too many barriers for me to attend and I just can’t. I’m not sure why I can’t join by myself but they aren’t interested. I can go to mass, but can’t register or become a member. Can’t take communion.

I miss the church I grew up with.


I feel like you got some really bad advice. How would you even baptize your children if you weren’t part of the church? That would be an unending circle! And your children’s baptism has no bearing on you receiving communion. Someone at that church needs a refresher!



Maybe pp would have to promise to baptize children as a condition of joining, or maybe children would have to be baptized first before pp could join. Whatever, the church is placing rule-following above pastoring.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I feel the exact same as OP. But I’ll say- the church doesn’t want you back. Not the Arlington diocese. I was told not to attend or take communion because my kids weren’t baptized. I feel like at this point there are too many barriers for me to attend and I just can’t. I’m not sure why I can’t join by myself but they aren’t interested. I can go to mass, but can’t register or become a member. Can’t take communion.

I miss the church I grew up with.


Well. the church you grew up with is long gone. It's like missing that old swimming hole that's dried up or become a drainage ditch. Nothing remains or it's been befouled. Now it's only a pleasant memory.
Anonymous
Too many pages to read, so I apologize if someone already suggested this. But check out an Episcopal Church. It will have much of what you miss, without much of what you didn't like about Catholicism.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I feel the exact same as OP. But I’ll say- the church doesn’t want you back. Not the Arlington diocese. I was told not to attend or take communion because my kids weren’t baptized. I feel like at this point there are too many barriers for me to attend and I just can’t. I’m not sure why I can’t join by myself but they aren’t interested. I can go to mass, but can’t register or become a member. Can’t take communion.

I miss the church I grew up with.


Well. the church you grew up with is long gone. It's like missing that old swimming hole that's dried up or become a drainage ditch. Nothing remains or it's been befouled. Now it's only a pleasant memory.


Catholics don’t “take” communion. They “receive it.” As for being told not to attend, while that may be what you “heard,” I have to think there was a significant miscommunication and/or you were talking to someone other than the parish priest. If you are a baptized Catholic, you are obliged to attend Sunday Mass, even if formally excommunicated. If the problem is that your children are not baptized, how can that be remedied if you do not attend Mass and develop a parish relationship? As for receiving communion, all that should stand between you and that should be a good confession and a firm purpose of amendment.

All of these things are perennial Church teaching.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I feel the exact same as OP. But I’ll say- the church doesn’t want you back. Not the Arlington diocese. I was told not to attend or take communion because my kids weren’t baptized. I feel like at this point there are too many barriers for me to attend and I just can’t. I’m not sure why I can’t join by myself but they aren’t interested. I can go to mass, but can’t register or become a member. Can’t take communion.

I miss the church I grew up with.


But the church you "grew up with" was the one deeply involved in sex abuse. Don't romanticize the church -- it's always had problems. Always will.

Find a different parish. I go in the Arlington Diocese and my church isn't like this at all. If you want to go back to the church, why wouldn't you want to get your kids baptized? If it's your spouse, then you certainly can go by yourself. There's no one at the door stopping you from going to mass.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I feel the exact same as OP. But I’ll say- the church doesn’t want you back. Not the Arlington diocese. I was told not to attend or take communion because my kids weren’t baptized. I feel like at this point there are too many barriers for me to attend and I just can’t. I’m not sure why I can’t join by myself but they aren’t interested. I can go to mass, but can’t register or become a member. Can’t take communion.

I miss the church I grew up with.


I feel like you got some really bad advice. How would you even baptize your children if you weren’t part of the church? That would be an unending circle! And your children’s baptism has no bearing on you receiving communion. Someone at that church needs a refresher!



Maybe pp would have to promise to baptize children as a condition of joining, or maybe children would have to be baptized first before pp could join. Whatever, the church is placing rule-following above pastoring.


I don’t really understand this, but maybe. It still doesn’t explain the communion thing. You wouldn’t need to be a member of that specific parish to receive communion (unless it was the sacrament of First Communion). You can travel to Catholic Churches all around the US and all of the beautiful churches in France and Italy and go to mass at every one and take communion every time.

The only thing I can think of that you need to join a specific church for is to receive a sacrament or to get a discount on the parish school tuition.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I feel the exact same as OP. But I’ll say- the church doesn’t want you back. Not the Arlington diocese. I was told not to attend or take communion because my kids weren’t baptized. I feel like at this point there are too many barriers for me to attend and I just can’t. I’m not sure why I can’t join by myself but they aren’t interested. I can go to mass, but can’t register or become a member. Can’t take communion.

I miss the church I grew up with.


I feel like you got some really bad advice. How would you even baptize your children if you weren’t part of the church? That would be an unending circle! And your children’s baptism has no bearing on you receiving communion. Someone at that church needs a refresher!


Maybe pp was trying to get a discount at the parish school by registering as a member of the parish, even though they aren’t planning to get their kids baptized. Or maybe that specific poster wasn’t trying to do that, but that parish has a history of people doing that in the past.
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