What secrets do most of your friends & family not know about you?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:that I frequently consider killing myself



Don't do it. Tell someone.
Anonymous
I appear happily married. However, DW suffers from crippling anxiety which sucks the life out of me. I would have been more successful if I hadn’t married her. I do love her, but I’m becoming resentful.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:That we used an egg donor for our second child. Our parents and siblings know, but no extended family. A few friends from college know, but my two best friends that I grew up with don't. They made a few comments over the years that made me feel like they would judge me/not understand, so I decided not to share.


I used DE too and the only people who know about it are 2 siblings and my kids.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:DH has no idea I identified as bisexual when we married and now identify as a lesbian married to a man. He doesn’t even know I’m attracted to women. If we divorce (which we very well might because we don’t get along for reasons having nothing to do with my sexuality), I’ll never date another man again.


Why do you think it is okay to lie to him about who he married?

I didn’t lie. He never asked about my sexuality, kinks, sexual history, or anything. He’s a very self-absorbed, uncurious person. When I asked him about his sexuality, history etc, his answers were plain and it was clear he had very little sexual experience and was ashamed of that. It made what should’ve been fun conversations feel awkward and needless.

When we were engaged and then soon got married, his lack of questions seemed like he was willing to accept me for whomever I am and just wanted to love me. I knew I wasn’t going to cheat, so bringing up my bisexuality to someone who really didn’t care to have the convo seemed needless. It took time for me to realize his lack of interest in basic details about others is actually a deep narcissism. By the time I realized that, I had too much contempt for him to confide. The rift has widened over time.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I am secretly ready for my father to die. He is mostly independent and not mean in any way but I am tired having to be responsible for him in general


Have the same feelings for my mother.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:DH has no idea I identified as bisexual when we married and now identify as a lesbian married to a man. He doesn’t even know I’m attracted to women. If we divorce (which we very well might because we don’t get along for reasons having nothing to do with my sexuality), I’ll never date another man again.


Um, ok... lol. Don't believe that for a second. You aren't being your true self, so you can't be authentic with him. Of course that causes issues and resentment on both sides over time.

Funnily, we have so many other issues that my sexuality doesn’t even rank in the top 10. He lied about/hid so much to get me to marry him. I’m talking his own untreated mental illness (that he refuses to treat), his sister’s raging drug addiction, his mom’s severe mental illness, his family’s racism. My secret is small potatoes in this hot mess.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:We are much more financially successful than my family or most of my friends know. I know that one family member who is also very rich has realized it based on various obscure things that he picked up on, but no one else has, and we like it that way.


+1. We’re friends with lots of other professional couples (lawyers, PE, physicians, tech sales from top schools) our age. I would guess average income is $400-600k and net worth of $500-1000k. We all talk about the same vacations, schools, clothing, hobbies so it would seem that we have a similar financial backgrounds as early 40 something professionals.

In reality, our net worth is about $10m.

A few of the folks closest to us have started to put together that our position has greatly changed. What I find more fascinating is the folks that don’t know. Some treat us very well, and we hold them close - those are our true friends. Some are competitive and I almost wish I could tell them because it’s hurting our friendships. Still others make it clear they look down their noses at us/don’t think we’re worth their time. We’re moving to a nicer neighborhood soon and that’ll make things more obvious. I won’t be forgetting who treated us poorly.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
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Anonymous wrote:I don’t have a bachelors degree. I’m not that many credits short and I do have an AA degree, but at this point in my life (at 43) I am not going back to $chool.

I lied on my resume from about 2002 - 2008 and got my career off the ground. If an employer had me fill out an official application, I would only list the AA degree. Never got caught because the resume got me the interview and I guess I always passed the bg check because I didn’t lie on the official paperwork.

Now I completely leave off education and go on my two decades of experience. And never had any student loan debt.



What do you do? And what baxheors degree did you list


I work in IT management…started out as a developer though. Pretty easy field to get away with something like this as opposed to say, nursing!

My major was computer science so that’s what I would list, but the AA that I got was just my generals.


This is bonkers, my friend same age did the same. Finance degree.


A lot of online applications require all your transcripts now. I guess it was easy to not require that 20 years ago, when you’d have to wait weeks for the college to reply & mail them out. Now, you can order an official transcript & have it sent in minutes.


What? I got a new job last year and filled out tons of online applications. I never once was asked to supply a transcript. If some place did that, I’d NOPE outta there. Who’s got time for that?


They ask after an offer and when a background check is run, they can also request transcripts. They don’t do it for every applicant. -another HR person
Anonymous
I have tons of facial hair (am a woman) that I pluck by hand nightly.
Anonymous
Im married and I talk to a man online. We have a very strong sexual chemistry. He lives in another state so we will never meet but our lusty conversations are fun. DH has zero drive and won’t do anything about it. I went on HRT to make things better but he’s content and not meeting my needs. I’ve tried for years. now I have an outlet.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I don’t have a bachelors degree. I’m not that many credits short and I do have an AA degree, but at this point in my life (at 43) I am not going back to $chool.

I lied on my resume from about 2002 - 2008 and got my career off the ground. If an employer had me fill out an official application, I would only list the AA degree. Never got caught because the resume got me the interview and I guess I always passed the bg check because I didn’t lie on the official paperwork.

Now I completely leave off education and go on my two decades of experience. And never had any student loan debt.



What do you do? And what baxheors degree did you list


I work in IT management…started out as a developer though. Pretty easy field to get away with something like this as opposed to say, nursing!

My major was computer science so that’s what I would list, but the AA that I got was just my generals.


This is bonkers, my friend same age did the same. Finance degree.


A lot of online applications require all your transcripts now. I guess it was easy to not require that 20 years ago, when you’d have to wait weeks for the college to reply & mail them out. Now, you can order an official transcript & have it sent in minutes.


What? I got a new job last year and filled out tons of online applications. I never once was asked to supply a transcript. If some place did that, I’d NOPE outta there. Who’s got time for that?


They ask after an offer and when a background check is run, they can also request transcripts. They don’t do it for every applicant. -another HR person


My most recent job didn’t do a background check but did ask for proof of education (easy for me to supply digitally — I just requested a digitally signed letter from my university’s registrar that they provided free of charge). It’s not terribly uncommon.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I go to nudist resorts very often in the summertime, yet don’t practice nudism in my own home/life.


I go to a nudist beach a few times a year. I have a home in Fl and there is one about 40 mins away. Haven’t ventured to a resort yet because I feel like they are very social and I’m introverted. Do you go locally? The one I that I think about going to is on the west coast of Fl.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I have tons of facial hair (am a woman) that I pluck by hand nightly.


Laser? Or do you have to let it grow in first which would be a problem.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We are much more financially successful than my family or most of my friends know. I know that one family member who is also very rich has realized it based on various obscure things that he picked up on, but no one else has, and we like it that way.


+1. We’re friends with lots of other professional couples (lawyers, PE, physicians, tech sales from top schools) our age. I would guess average income is $400-600k and net worth of $500-1000k. We all talk about the same vacations, schools, clothing, hobbies so it would seem that we have a similar financial backgrounds as early 40 something professionals.

In reality, our net worth is about $10m.

A few of the folks closest to us have started to put together that our position has greatly changed. What I find more fascinating is the folks that don’t know. Some treat us very well, and we hold them close - those are our true friends. Some are competitive and I almost wish I could tell them because it’s hurting our friendships. Still others make it clear they look down their noses at us/don’t think we’re worth their time. We’re moving to a nicer neighborhood soon and that’ll make things more obvious. I won’t be forgetting who treated us poorly.


You sound insane.
Anonymous
I spend my time wasting hours with scammers who call from India.
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