Best school for gifted kid? Looking for differentiation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And if you question me: she went to the Juilliard pre-college program for double bass. She was taught by bassists from the Met Opera orchestra and the NY Philharmonic. These included Homer Mensch. She went to Tanglewood over the summers.

Hopefully that’s enough detail to convince you I know what I’m talking about.

You are the ridiculous one. How would you know what her music abilities were. Just because you have a sister who was a music prodigy and you weren’t, doesn’t mean this poster wasn’t a prodigious music talent either.

For someone who claims to have a IQ in the 140s, you sound amazingly closed minded.

I just find it offensive that PP would claim to know his/her musical talent was extraordinary when he/she never put it to the test. I know what her musical abilities were because she achieved great things with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We started our private school journey thinking that social skills and emotional maturity were more important than a focus on intellectual achievement. We’re at a Big 3 elementary finishing up 3rd grade.

I’m starting to rethink our choices and wondering whether we made the wrong decisions, or at least should consider different choices.

Sadly, we’ve learned that our school doesn’t deal well with the emotional needs of gifted children. Our DC has the classic gifted kid emotional profile: emotional intensity, perfectionism, combined with a sensitivity that is consistently misinterpreted as “immaturity” and “overreacting.”

DC learns faster than peers, and is several years ahead of grade level in reading, math, and science. He is allowed some freedom to pursue advanced reading.However, in math and science, subjects DC loves, there is no opportunity for differentiation or advanced learning. Aside from reading, there’s no differentiation period. DC has complained for some time (since the start of 1st grade) about being bored and going over things that are too easy over and over again.

I’m wondering if it would better for DC to be in a school that allows for more differentiation in the elementary grades. Are Feynman and Nysmith the only private schools that allow gifted kids to go at their own pace? I worry about these schools lacking an overall balance. On the other hand, I remember what torture it was to be forced lockstep into a pace that didn’t fit.

It seems that schools like Sidwell, GDS, and STA don’t allow differentiation until 9th. I can see DC getting turned off from school and learning if forced to wait another six years before being allowed to pursue things at a pace that fits him.

I’m also wondering if a school that knows how to work with gifted kids’ emotional needs might be better. I worry that DC is being labeled as oversensitive, even as some teachers praise his empathy and compassion for other kids.

I know there are a lot of gifted kids at the Big 3s. I also know not all gifted kids have the emotional profile that includes intensity, perfectionism, and sensitivity. I’d appreciate if parents who have kids similar to mine could speak to their experience in the upper elementary and middle schools of the Big 3? Or, if you left for a school that specializes in gifted education, could you speak to that experience?

Nysmith parent here and very happy with the school. Have you looked into Ideaventions Academy in Reston? They have PG kids too and DYS students. I recommend you touring the schools, take in account your intuition, you'll know. After touring many private and experiencing public school, I knew Nysmith was the right fit for our child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

PP, OP here again. We are eager to learn more about Nysmith.

Can you share what the social life is like? I imagine the schools has many commuter kids. How often do kids get together for play dates after school? Is there a close-knit parent community? Are kids who live farther away less apt to be part of the social life of the school?

We will have a significant commute.

OP, PP from overseas. While I guess most families live nearby, I met families commuting from Bethesda, Arlington, Alexandria and DC proper. DS had his first playdate three weeks after the school starts. He got quickly involved in activities with school mates (boys and girls) for which they had to meet regularly during weekends - so our schedule was packed. We also had quite a commute but were willing to do the extra mile (literally) to facilitate DS's social life. I guess we were not different from the other parents as some also drove a handful number of times to our place for playdates. The PTA is pretty active - but I was not involved at all due to time constraints.

[Anonymous]

PP who could have gone to Juilliard, here.

I'm not going to go through my qualifications in detail, but I had significant childhood accomplishments. I had the choice between top-notch conservatories and universities and chose the university path.

I was already good enough as a teenager to play professionally, and did. I've been able to continue to do so, and have during years when I've held jobs that haven't required a ton of hours. (Many major cities have multiple professional orchestras that are part-time, and there's always pick-up orchestra work too.)

By the way, your sister that went to Juilliard pre-college did not "go to Juilliard". No one in the professional world countenances that phrasing for pre-college students. The standard for the pre-college program is nowhere near the standard for the conservatory, and anyone who says they "went to Juilliard" when they were just at the pre-college program is seriously misrepresenting themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP who could have gone to Juilliard, here.

I'm not going to go through my qualifications in detail, but I had significant childhood accomplishments. I had the choice between top-notch conservatories and universities and chose the university path.

I was already good enough as a teenager to play professionally, and did. I've been able to continue to do so, and have during years when I've held jobs that haven't required a ton of hours. (Many major cities have multiple professional orchestras that are part-time, and there's always pick-up orchestra work too.)

By the way, your sister that went to Juilliard pre-college did not "go to Juilliard". No one in the professional world countenances that phrasing for pre-college students. The standard for the pre-college program is nowhere near the standard for the conservatory, and anyone who says they "went to Juilliard" when they were just at the pre-college program is seriously misrepresenting themselves.

Fine. She went to Juilliard pre-college program. Happy?

She was encouraged by Homer Mensch and others in the double bass community (Jeremy McCoy in particular, who became her main teacher after Homer died) to apply to Juilliard and other conservatories. She chose to apply to universities instead because she wanted a college degree and didn't want to play professionally.

[Anonymous]

How is she different than the OP then? They both could have gone to Juilliard and chose a different path instead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How is she different than the OP then? They both could have gone to Juilliard and chose a different path instead.

1. Juilliard wannabe isn’t OP.

2. Juilliard wannabe hasn’t given any concrete information about any prestigious audition he/she actually passed. You can play professionally at a community orchestra; it doesn’t mean you could get into Juilliard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

PP, OP here again. We are eager to learn more about Nysmith.

Can you share what the social life is like? I imagine the schools has many commuter kids. How often do kids get together for play dates after school? Is there a close-knit parent community? Are kids who live farther away less apt to be part of the social life of the school?

We will have a significant commute.

OP, PP from overseas. While I guess most families live nearby, I met families commuting from Bethesda, Arlington, Alexandria and DC proper. DS had his first playdate three weeks after the school starts. He got quickly involved in activities with school mates (boys and girls) for which they had to meet regularly during weekends - so our schedule was packed. We also had quite a commute but were willing to do the extra mile (literally) to facilitate DS's social life. I guess we were not different from the other parents as some also drove a handful number of times to our place for playdates. The PTA is pretty active - but I was not involved at all due to time constraints.

Thanks for this information, PP. — OP

[Anonymous]

Musical PP here. (I'm carefully avoiding all identifying information. The professional music community here isn't all that large.)

You cannot "play professionally in a community orchestra", because a community orchestra is made up of unpaid volunteers. The only exceptions are those community orchestras that pay some/all principal players, and competition for those spots can be fairly fierce -- certainly as competitive as any other professional audition in this area.

Many Juilliard pre-college graduates can't pass a professional orchestra audition, by the way. And a significant number of them won't pass major conservatory auditions either, and will go to second-tier schools (or they'll choose non-musical careers).

In any event, this is all off-topic, I have no need to prove anything to anyone, and I'm not sure why Doubter PP is so intent on trying to put down the various other posters in this thread.

My intent, in mentioning some musical background, was to point out that sometimes it's useful for PG kids to be able to channel their abilities in multiple directions, rather than putting it all into academics. The real goal is to produce functional adults who have happy lives. That doesn't mean maximizing potential, but rather producing an adult who can lead a life that makes them happy and gives them the intellectual and creative stimulation they need.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems that schools like Sidwell, GDS, and STA don’t allow differentiation until 9th.

I have a hard time believing that this statement is 100 percent true.

It is for a case of true gifted child, not high achieving. Highly gifted learners think differently and learn at a much faster rate.

[Anonymous]

It's your contention that the Big 3 schools, over the years, haven't ever accommodated any of their "highly gifted" students with some kind of differentiation prior to 9th grade?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's your contention that the Big 3 schools, over the years, haven't ever accommodated any of their "highly gifted" students with some kind of differentiation prior to 9th grade?

What makes you think they admit highly gifted kids seeking differentiation before 9th?

[Anonymous]

You're telling me that, currently, there are literally no highly gifted or profoundly gifted children attending Big 3 schools prior to 9th grade?

[Anonymous]

Did OP ever give the IQ are we talking 130 or >139?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did OP ever give the IQ are we talking 130 or >139?

Nope. Despite repeated requests, OP refused and just wanted us to believe her kid is “profoundly gifted.”