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Parents of children with super high IQ scores - where are your children in school?
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Anonymous
fair enough - perhaps I was too facile with the equivalence - but parents who pay attention to high-iq needs are being responsible and trying to find appropriate educational environments can be just as challenging (and unaffordable) as trying to find the appropriate environments for the kids with disabilities - even if the needs and nature of risk that the kids face may be different |
Anonymous
Why can't a parent try to meet the needs of a child that is on the very top end of the spectrum w/o being acused of bravado? It amazes me how many people get their feathers ruffled over this topic and how many do not understand that there ARE issues of a child is not being challenged in school! I have no interest in divulging scores but will say that it was our child's TEACHER that hounded us to do something for our child other than public school (and we have a great one in our neighborhood). We dragged our feet as long as we could - figuring it would all work out and we could try the public school out first - but eventually we followed her advice and sought professional advice and it was very much the best decision for our child. Fine if you think there are people here just bragging - but there are valid cases out there - so let these families get the information they need to do well by their child. Meanwhile - Why do you bother reading these posts if they offend you so much? Why waste your time? And those of people who genuinely want help? |
Anonymous
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Truth, 149 and currently rocking straight Cs at one of the Big Three. Bored to death. Doesn't study a lick; not intellectually motivated. Drives teachers crazy. Fails the small tests and then passes the hard tests. Laughs at students who get straight As. Thinks they're dull. Where did this come from? Afraid to tell DC that I did the same thing.
It will be an interesting ride. Truth be told I might have DC take GED in two years and go to college. However, DC is not emotionally ready for college and I doubt college is emotionally ready for DC. Thinks Facebook is stupid. |
Anonymous
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[quote=Anonymous]Truth, 149 and currently rocking straight Cs at one of the Big Three. Bored to death. Doesn't study a lick; not intellectually motivated. Drives teachers crazy. Fails the small tests and then passes the hard tests. Laughs at students who get straight As. Thinks they're dull. Where did this come from? Afraid to tell DC that I did the same thing.
It will be an interesting ride. Truth be told I might have DC take GED in two years and go to college. However, DC is not emotionally ready for college and I doubt college is emotionally ready for DC. Thinks Facebook is stupid. [/quote] Yes, I'd say that's a kid who is not being challenged.Have you ever read about how Einstein felt in school? He hated it.... |
Anonymous
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Truth, 149 and currently rocking straight Cs at one of the Big Three. Bored to death. Doesn't study a lick; not intellectually motivated. Drives teachers crazy. Fails the small tests and then passes the hard tests. Laughs at students who get straight As. Thinks they're dull. Where did this come from? Afraid to tell DC that I did the same thing.
It will be an interesting ride. Truth be told I might have DC take GED in two years and go to college. However, DC is not emotionally ready for college and I doubt college is emotionally ready for DC. Thinks Facebook is stupid. [/quote] Yes, I'd say that's a kid who is not being challenged.Have you ever read about how Einstein felt in school? He hated it....[/quote] Or, he's just not that motivated, which is a totally different issue. |
Anonymous
This doesn't sound like boredom to me. Have you had him tested for ADHD? He could be a super genius but be unable to connect the dots and instead of just pushing him along to the next level (when he really isn't mastering this one -- pulling his grades up to C on the major tests is hardly success) maybe you should make sure there isn't an underlying issue here that should be addressed. PLus, I'm sorry to say this because it will sound harsh, but your DC sounds like a bit of a jerk. He's feeling superior to the kids with As and he's pulling Cs? Rather than tag the genius label on him maybe you should step back and assess whats going on. He may be a genius but he's struggling with something. |
Anonymous
ITA. This describes my kid a bit. DC has the test scores to prove smartness, and is at a challenging MoCo magnet (after having been bored at private), with inspiring teachers. DC can't say enough about the teachers, loved having to solve the rubik's cube in under five minutes for math class, loves learning computer programming languages to the point that DC does it in spare time. But DC would almost rather get B's than A's, for various silly reasons like the "nerdy" kids get A's, lots of the kids in the magnet have parents pushing them and even doing the work for them and, anyway, doesn't a "B" mean "good?" Not good reasons, I know, and we've had long talks with DC about all this. |
Anonymous
| Motivation is an ongoing problem in our family, despite fantastic test scores. I'd be interested to hear other parents' thoughts on it. |
Anonymous
| A little bit of depression, maybe? Does DC have things s/he loves and can't get enough of? |
Anonymous
This is the problem with labeling some kids as genius, smart, whatever you want to call it. My brother was labeled as a genius, super high IQ as a child (150+) as many parents have posted about their children. He went to private school (elementary) then magnet high school. He was recruited by Harvard and other Ivy schools in the beginning of his junior year but stopped performing well in school so his grades slipped the last two years of high school. He ended up taking forever to finish college in Michigan. He works in finance and does okay for himself, but still not that ambitious. My mom is still trying to figure out what she did wrong. I or the other hand was just considered smart and hardworking. I went to private school (parochial), earned top grades and got accepted into an Ivy. I finished college on time and now I am finishing my PhD. I share this because I am trying to learn from my parents mistakes with my own DS (who tested super high). I remember my mom going on in on about how smart my brother was as a child. I also remember that he knew how smart he was. I have read several articles and have done some research on child development and education that argue that telling kids how smart they are and labeling them as super high IQ can actually negatively influence educational performance over the long term. I truly believe that is what happened to my brother. Like PPs he got C's in school instead of A's, complained about being bored and didn't put forth any effort. He was in one of the most challenging high schools in the northeast and he was bored? And no, he didn't have ADHD. Just a person who thought he was smart and therefore he didn't need to show any motivation/initiative. We want my DS to love learning, as we do. We want our son to realize that achievement also equals effort. I think he will do fine at one of the private or public schools in the area. I'm sorry, but I know too many people that were labeled gifted as a child that are a) complete slackers or b) living ordinary lives, i.e. no significant contributions to society. They have little to show for their 140+ IQs. Please read this article (http://nymag.com/news/features/27840/). |
Anonymous
Disagree strongly--I also have one of each, and I think it is almost exactly the same. In fact, if anything, it has been MUCH easier to get appropriate educational services for our LD child than for our 99.9% child. |
Anonymous
PP again. Obviously disabilities fall on a range but I have a child with an ASD and another who is NT (both, actually, have high IQs) and there is no way I would compare the two. You are fortunate that your child's needs can be met by the school system but for those of us whose children have more profound disabilities, it is a 24/7 effort. Schools can do a great deal but it is never enough. I retract nothing about what I wrote. |
Anonymous
| In my experience, as a teacher, motivation and IQ are uncorrelated. And, honestly, motivation is the more important, even in technical subjects like physics and differential equations. People tend to confused boredom with lack of motivation. Boredom, however, is actually easy to cure. There are lots and lots of fun, interesting projects out there. There are internships at local universities, Goddard, etc. There are all kinds of cool independent study projects. Lack of motivation and lack of drive, however, are hard to overcome. I've had lots of success helping students with boredom. I've had lots of success helping students with subjects that are a bit too difficult for them. The unmotivated student, however, is hard to change. I don't know why. These students break your heart. |
Anonymous
Point taken. But what happens when the kid gets into a magnet that accepts 1/7 kids, and the kids' friends don't get in - then he/she knows they're smart, without a parent telling them. I'm not disagreeing with you, but I also think that motivation is an issue, and that there is more than one factor going on here. We have one of each type of kid - a kid who is a self-driven perfectionist, and a kid who is a B student despite smarts - and I don't believe we've treated them differently. Could there be something innate? Or is it all down to parenting? |
Anonymous
I see your point--I don't like when people blame parents for all their kids problems--so I shouldn't blame my mom for my brother's lack of motivation. I think there is something innate and environmental factors (parenting/culture/etc.) that contributes to behavior. I am worried that my DS won't meet his full potential and so I think about these issues a lot. My parents don't think they treated my brother and I any different and maybe they didn't--maybe it was my own insecurities about my intelligence and comparing myself to my brother that distorted my memories of childhood). |