Free-range parents cited but not charged

[Anonymous]

^^^PP here, grew up in a close-in Boston suburb.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It amazes me how uptight parents can be. Social media and 24hr hyped-up news really have done their jobs of making you all paranoid. I walked 2 blocks to a school bus stop by myself until I met up with others starting in K. There was never a mom at a bus stop after the first day. Ever! It was no big deal because we all played outside on our own already. Today every mom/nanny is at the bus stop and many even drive to the bus stops. Now if I let my 7yr old walk home the 8 houses alone, I look like a negligent mom.

Another thing that has changed is parents working longer hours and many people not knowing and not having friendly relationships with their neighbors. It's different when you don't know the people 2 doors down -- which you usually did when I was coming up and I am 48.

We know everyone in our neighborhood, as do our kids. They know where to go if they need help.

Silver Spring 20910

That is lovely -- I live in SS too and know a lot of our neighbors but I know a lot of people around the DMV that do not know a lot their neighbors. Geez Christmas -- not everyone's experience is the same. And, yes, a lot of things about how people relate to their neighbors, how many kids you see running around outside after school, yes they have changed since 1974. I was just denoting that things have changed a lot, was not saying at what age kids should be allowed to be unsupervised.
sheesh

I'm the Silver Spring 20910 PP. DH and I work full-time but we know our neighbors from school; church; the swim club/pool; soccer teams; moms' group (a long time ago now); the annual neighborhood block party; the listserv. The list goes on and on. I don't know every last neighbor for blocks around, but I could walk the neighborhood for an hour and give you information about (and stop and chat with) people on every street, easily. When my mom died a few years ago, many neighbors brought food and sent condolence notes. And I am not from this area!

Not everyone's suburban 2015 experience is the same.

Isn't that what I said? Isn't that what I told you, that while some people know all their neighbors , some folks do not?
Wasn't that my point? Some people do not live in neighborhoods where they know a lot of families and are comfortable with their kid walking too far from their house. I know a social worker that lives in a small town where everyone knows just about everyone else. And guess what, a lot of those families are plagues with child sexual abuse. It's crazy!!! And it is not the paranoid media at fault. That is a real problem, not the law saying your kid cannot supervise your 6 yr old.

How is this relevant? Most children who are sexually abused are abused inside, not outside in broad daylight while walking to the park.

it was in response to the knowing your neighbor

OK, so I guess you should never trust anyone, no matter how well you know them, & never let your kids leave you side?

Listen, I was sexually abused as a kid so I'm all for taking reasonable precautions that will significantly lesson the chances of kids being abused. But not allowing a 6-year-old to walk to the park with her 10-year-old siblings isn't going to significantly lesson the chance of her being sexually abused.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read all 8 pages of this thread, but I will tell you a few things that were completely normal back in my day:

--Drano under the sink; no safety locks
--me riding public transportation alone, in an urban area, at 8 years old
--several kids piled in the "way back" of the station wagon; no seatbelts, of course
--as many kids as could fit in the backseat; sitting on laps was the norm. Again, no seatbelts
--smoking everywhere, including doctors' offices
--my grandmother giving me booze for a toothache
--and my personal favorite: when I was an infant, my mother used to visit my grandmother, who lived in a different neighborhood in our urban area. She would leave me sleeping in the stroller outside so I could "get some fresh air" while she visited. Totally not uncommon in those days.

Should those kids have walked alone? I don't know. But the excuse "it used to be OK" doesn't fly on its own merits.

If traffic has gotten so much worse than maybe nobody should ever walk anywhere? Because children who have shown themselves to be responsible enough to stay on the sidewalk, wait to cross when & where appropriate, etc. are no more likely to be injured or killed by a car when walking with a sibling than with an adult. If a driver is being reckless enough to hi a pedestrian on the sidewalk or one who is crossing at an intersection at an appropriate time, he or she will likely do so regardless of who that pedestrian is walking with.



Thank you!!!! I can tell you what else has changed since the 70's. Traffic has gotten a lot worse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read all 8 pages of this thread, but I will tell you a few things that were completely normal back in my day:

--Drano under the sink; no safety locks
--me riding public transportation alone, in an urban area, at 8 years old
--several kids piled in the "way back" of the station wagon; no seatbelts, of course
--as many kids as could fit in the backseat; sitting on laps was the norm. Again, no seatbelts
--smoking everywhere, including doctors' offices
--my grandmother giving me booze for a toothache
--and my personal favorite: when I was an infant, my mother used to visit my grandmother, who lived in a different neighborhood in our urban area. She would leave me sleeping in the stroller outside so I could "get some fresh air" while she visited. Totally not uncommon in those days.

Should those kids have walked alone? I don't know. But the excuse "it used to be OK" doesn't fly on its own merits.

If traffic has gotten so much worse than maybe nobody should ever walk anywhere? Because children who have shown themselves to be responsible enough to stay on the sidewalk, wait to cross when & where appropriate, etc. are no more likely to be injured or killed by a car when walking with a sibling than with an adult. If a driver is being reckless enough to hi a pedestrian on the sidewalk or one who is crossing at an intersection at an appropriate time, he or she will likely do so regardless of who that pedestrian is walking with.



Thank you!!!! I can tell you what else has changed since the 70's. Traffic has gotten a lot worse.

I grew up in an urban area & now live in the suburbs. There was a lot more traffic en route to the park I walked to as a kid than there is on the streets kids in my current neighborhood would have to walk on to get to the park. So why were all of my childhood neighbors were allowed to walk to the park without an adult in elementary school when few of the kids in my current neighborhood are allowed to?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am genuinely curious where people who say that they were crossing streets and leaving the boundaries of their block alone at age 6 grew up. I grew up in a more suburban part of Brooklyn, and this definitely didn't happen. DH grew up in suburban Chicago, and he says kids didn't do that at 6 in his neighborhood either.

I walked home from the K bus by myself or with another K friend. It was only half day then. Just because you didn't do something, doesn't mean most didn't also.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read all 8 pages of this thread, but I will tell you a few things that were completely normal back in my day:

--Drano under the sink; no safety locks
--me riding public transportation alone, in an urban area, at 8 years old
--several kids piled in the "way back" of the station wagon; no seatbelts, of course
--as many kids as could fit in the backseat; sitting on laps was the norm. Again, no seatbelts
--smoking everywhere, including doctors' offices
--my grandmother giving me booze for a toothache
--and my personal favorite: when I was an infant, my mother used to visit my grandmother, who lived in a different neighborhood in our urban area. She would leave me sleeping in the stroller outside so I could "get some fresh air" while she visited. Totally not uncommon in those days.

Should those kids have walked alone? I don't know. But the excuse "it used to be OK" doesn't fly on its own merits.

If traffic has gotten so much worse than maybe nobody should ever walk anywhere? Because children who have shown themselves to be responsible enough
to stay on the sidewalk, wait to cross when & where appropriate, etc. are no more likely to be injured or killed by a car when walking with a sibling than with an adult. If a driver is being reckless enough to hi a pedestrian on the sidewalk or one who is crossing at an intersection at an appropriate time, he or she will likely do so regardless of who that pedestrian is walking with.



Thank you!!!! I can tell you what else has changed since the 70's. Traffic has gotten a lot worse.

I grew up in an urban area & now live in the suburbs. There was a lot more traffic en route to the park I walked to as a kid than there is on the streets kids in my current neighborhood would have to walk on to get to the park. So why were all of my childhood neighbors were allowed to walk to the park without an adult in elementary school when few of the kids in my current neighborhood are allowed to?

So why were all the 70's kids allowed to roll around unrestrained and surrounded by glass in the back of the station wagon when it would be considered shockingly irresponsible now? Were cars safer back then? Of course not. Parents were a lot more reckless then, that's why. Society generally progresses over time, and personally I think having higher safety standards for our children is a sign of advancement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

So why were all the 70's kids allowed to roll around unrestrained and surrounded by glass in the back of the station wagon when it would be considered shockingly irresponsible now? Were cars safer back then? Of course not. Parents were a lot more reckless then, that's why. Society generally progresses over time, and personally I think having higher safety standards for our children is a sign of advancement.

Since the 1970s, the number of child deaths in car wrecks has fallen significantly, due to carseats, seatbelts, and safer cars.

Since the 1970s, the number of child abductions by strangers has...well, actually it hasn't changed. But the lives of children sure are a lot more restricted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I agree. I'm 42 and I played outside at 6 but couldn't go further than half a block away. I don't remember kindergarteners walking to school alone either, maybe with an older sibling but not completely unaccompanied. Some of these stories sound a lot like our grandparents stories of walking 10 miles to school, all uphill

If you're 42, you are right on the edge, then.

Honestly, this makes me feel like I'm insisting that the sun did too used to rise and set when I was a child. Kindergarteners used to routinely walk to school alone. You may not believe it, but they did. I am not making this up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

So why were all the 70's kids allowed to roll around unrestrained and surrounded by glass in the back of the station wagon when it would be considered shockingly irresponsible now? Were cars safer back then? Of course not. Parents were a lot more reckless then, that's why. Society generally progresses over time, and personally I think having higher safety standards for our children is a sign of advancement.

Since the 1970s, the number of child deaths in car wrecks has fallen significantly, due to carseats, seatbelts, and safer cars.

Since the 1970s, the number of child abductions by strangers has...well, actually it hasn't changed. But the lives of children sure are a lot more restricted.

I'm not sure that the lives of children are more restricted simply due to the mistaken belief that they are more likely to be abducted now, although that certainly plays a part. I suspect a lot of parents just feel less willingly to let their children be in risky situations that parents in the past brushed off. When I was a kid I was allowed to ride my bike along busy streets that I would never let my kids bike along now. I know I will be attacked for this, but I think parents in the past were too lax, and today's parents have just wised up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I agree. I'm 42 and I played outside at 6 but couldn't go further than half a block away. I don't remember kindergarteners walking to school alone either, maybe with an older sibling but not completely unaccompanied. Some of these stories sound a lot like our grandparents stories of walking 10 miles to school, all uphill

If you're 42, you are right on the edge, then.

Honestly, this makes me feel like I'm insisting that the sun did too used to rise and set when I was a child. Kindergarteners used to routinely walk to school alone. You may not believe it, but they did. I am not making this up.

Did these Kindergarteners live across the street from the school? Without knowing the distance your speaking of this doesn't mean much. I don't recall it being the norm for 5 year olds to walk long distances unaccompanied. Would some moms have been cool with it? Sure. There were irresponsible parents in the 70's just like there are now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I agree. I'm 42 and I played outside at 6 but couldn't go further than half a block away. I don't remember kindergarteners walking to school alone either, maybe with an older sibling but not completely unaccompanied. Some of these stories sound a lot like our grandparents stories of walking 10 miles to school, all uphill

If you're 42, you are right on the edge, then.

Honestly, this makes me feel like I'm insisting that the sun did too used to rise and set when I was a child. Kindergarteners used to routinely walk to school alone. You may not believe it, but they did. I am not making this up.

Did these Kindergarteners live across the street from the school? Without knowing the distance your speaking of this doesn't mean much. I don't recall it being the norm for 5 year olds to walk long distances unaccompanied. Would some moms have been cool with it? Sure. There were irresponsible parents in the 70's just like there are now.

No, the kindergarteners lived up to a mile from the school. And evidently all of the mothers (and fathers) in the 1970s were irresponsible, because this was normal life. How old are you?

[Anonymous]

42 and no this was not normal for everyone.

[Anonymous]

PP here. I remember running up and down the block at the age of 6 and being all over the neighborhood at 8. I also remember when my younger sister was 4 she had a friend who lived down the street and they would walk back and forth to each other's houses alone, but one of the moms would always stand outside and watch until the other got home. These behaviors would be considered permissive now, but are a far cry from what some of the other posters are portraying as typical in the 70s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:42 and no this was not normal for everyone.

That's because you are 42. Ask somebody who is 52.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:42 and no this was not normal for everyone.

That's because you are 42. Ask somebody who is 52.

^^^or 62, 72, 82, 92...