Tell me about your weird co-worker(s)...

[Anonymous]

oh! once someone was let go from a project and asked to return their temp badge id. she peed all over it and cut it up into little pieces, and put it in a plastic bag before handing it over to the supervisor.

she was a temp/contract worker, it wasn't a big 'you're fired' deal. she just didn't do so great and was told she didn't need to come back after the next week or something like that. obviously she took it verrry personally!

[Anonymous]

My first job out of law school, I worked for this attorney who would get into daily, irate, long sreaming matches with his ex-wife over their son and other matters. It was the most awkward thing. He would pace around on his cell phone around my desk so there was no escape for me. He also made me and a legal assistant stay after work one day to watch his 9 year old son's "one man show". We had to arrange our chairs around the "stage" and sit there for an hour.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had a woman in another department who was on sick leave for a bit. She is a hoarder and if her cube is any indication of her house god help her. Well the office was moving and her thigns had to be packed up during her leave and a dead mouse was found in her cube.

Another co-worker brings her bag/ fanny pack everywhere and then leaves it ont he bottom of the bathroom floor when she uses the bathroom? Nasty!

OMG!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is excellent.

Small law firm, hired an office manager who came highly recommended by prominent law professor. She was a flamboyant pre-op transwoman with a truly bad look (stringy hair with 2" roots, drag-queen makeup several shades off her skin tone, morbidly obese in revealing clothes and ill-fitting fuck-me pumps). Weird baby voice. She spent several months mortifying young associates with surprise "work-related" trips to porn shops and sexually harassing the clerical staff, bringing in her young jock boyfriends and spending all day doing their college papers, generally not doing her job. She got me fired - threw away the instructions I had left for filings, etc. when I went on vacation, which screwed our clients, then told the partners I hadn't prepped her at all. It really stung, given my good record, but they were really that impressed with her resume.

They figured it out within a couple of months, but by that time she was embezzling and committing other fraud. The resume was fabricated, with friends pretending to be HR, and the great recommendation was a result of blackmail. This was pre-Google, so checking someone out was nowhere near as easy as it is now.

It turned out that all of her work experience was as a prostitute/sugar baby. A friend tracked her down recently and she is still getting it on with young blond jocks, apparently, and is an eminence grise in the San Francisco trans and sex worker advocacy communities.

Really? For real?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My first job out of law school, I worked for this attorney who would get into daily, irate, long sreaming matches with his ex-wife over their son and other matters. It was the most awkward thing. He would pace around on his cell phone around my desk so there was no escape for me. He also made me and a legal assistant stay after work one day to watch his 9 year old son's "one man show". We had to arrange our chairs around the "stage" and sit there for an hour.

What kind of show was it?

[Anonymous]

The strangest or most obnoxious coworkers I have had..

1. Worked for a professor in college on a research study. Whenever she was about the submit a grant she wore the same clothes everyday for at least a week and it looked like she never washed them. She was also prone to temper tantrums when she worked with grad students. I was glad to be low on the totem poll.

2. Little Miss perfect supervisor who liked to brag about all her accomplishments chased after a guy younger than her, who was in an artsy low pay field and she married him. Nicest guy you could meet. She complained incessantly about his lack of motivation and how she was trying to get him to take ritalin so he could work harder. She used to yell at him constantly in person and on the phone. I was happy for him when I heard he finally had enough, moved on and found someone who appreciated him.

3. Obese coworker who at first seems like such a sweet person who talks frequently about trying to lose weight. I respect that part. Well any time anyone in the office lost weight and it was noticeable, she baked and would deliver treats for that person. Passive aggressive much?

4. The farter...maybe he needed to go off dairy..maybe beans were his issue, whatever was causing it, it was awful.

[Anonymous]

I was at a work-training for several weeks with a bunch of strangers. The classroom stunk so badly that we all kept saying that someone must have left rotten food in the trashcan all weekend. Eventually, we realized that one of our classmates had incredible BO. I've never experienced such strong BO in my life. She would leave a trail of it where she walked. As it turns out, she's from Nigeria, and her "scent" is considered very attractive in her culture. To see her, she looked perfectly clean and maintained. Then, someone got up the courage to gently confront her about it. The next day the odor was gone. I'm glad for her, because she otherwise was a great person. I'm sure she must be successful whatever she's doing now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was at a work-training for several weeks with a bunch of strangers. The classroom stunk so badly that we all kept saying that someone must have left rotten food in the trashcan all weekend. Eventually, we realized that one of our classmates had incredible BO. I've never experienced such strong BO in my life. She would leave a trail of it where she walked. As it turns out, she's from Nigeria, and her "scent" is considered very attractive in her culture. To see her, she looked perfectly clean and maintained. Then, someone got up the courage to gently confront her about it. The next day the odor was gone. I'm glad for her, because she otherwise was a great person. I'm sure she must be successful whatever she's doing now.

You're stupid. That little bit about Nigeria is not true at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My first job out of law school, I worked for this attorney who would get into daily, irate, long sreaming matches with his ex-wife over their son and other matters. It was the most awkward thing. He would pace around on his cell phone around my desk so there was no escape for me. He also made me and a legal assistant stay after work one day to watch his 9 year old son's "one man show". We had to arrange our chairs around the "stage" and sit there for an hour.

What kind of show was it?

I honestly don't even remember. He was playing "putting on a show". I was fidgeting and looking at the clock the whole time. I think part of it was showing his martial arts moves.

[Anonymous]

Had a co-worker who would bring her whole family to every in-house happy hour and her kids would proceed to hord plates full of food. The company had to send out an email telling "people" not to take extra food.

[Anonymous]

The center director at my office has a Ph.D. and is incredibly revered in her field. She eats with her hands and it is common knowledge around the office to get to the food that has been put out before her. Last week she was sharing cupcakes that someone had brought in for her as a gift. She ran her fingers around the edge of EVERY cupcake between the paper to sample the frosting and then licking her fingers and going back for more, as she was giving them to people. By the time she got to the last one, there was a huge ring of frosting missing- the unlucky co-worker took it with a look of complete terror on their face, and then through it away when she wasn't looking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Had a co-worker who would bring her whole family to every in-house happy hour and her kids would proceed to hord plates full of food. The company had to send out an email telling "people" not to take extra food.

Haha. I had a coworker who brought tupperware to every work function that had food. People told her to stop several times before she did.

[Anonymous]

Someone (no one knew who) would leave their toenails in the freezer and microwave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Someone (no one knew who) would leave their toenails in the freezer and microwave.

winner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is excellent.

Small law firm, hired an office manager who came highly recommended by prominent law professor. She was a flamboyant pre-op transwoman with a truly bad look (stringy hair with 2" roots, drag-queen makeup several shades off her skin tone, morbidly obese in revealing clothes and ill-fitting fuck-me pumps). Weird baby voice. She spent several months mortifying young associates with surprise "work-related" trips to porn shops and sexually harassing the clerical staff, bringing in her young jock boyfriends and spending all day doing their college papers, generally not doing her job. She got me fired - threw away the instructions I had left for filings, etc. when I went on vacation, which screwed our clients, then told the partners I hadn't prepped her at all. It really stung, given my good record, but they were really that impressed with her resume.

They figured it out within a couple of months, but by that time she was embezzling and committing other fraud. The resume was fabricated, with friends pretending to be HR, and the great recommendation was a result of blackmail. This was pre-Google, so checking someone out was nowhere near as easy as it is now.

It turned out that all of her work experience was as a prostitute/sugar baby. A friend tracked her down recently and she is still getting it on with young blond jocks, apparently, and is an eminence grise in the San Francisco trans and sex worker advocacy communities.

Really? For real?

100%. She's on Facebook and Youtube.