They why was there no prenup? And why wouldn't that protection include not every marrying in the first place? Not a lot of smart decision making in this hasty marriage where OPs daughter didn't even understand his debt situation. |
Well obviously they are not rich as has debt |
That is why pro nups are available. |
Pretty sure that you misunderstood the post. |
Very odd conversation to me. I had an expensive MBA with 150k in debt, and graduated just before we were married. I’m not sure how a married couple/family can treat debt as belonging to only one person. It impacts the entire family and of course the spouse must help pay it off. Unless you want to live totally separate financial lives which is weird. |
OP wouldn’t even ask the question but if the roles were reversed. Men would have no problems paying the wives’ student debt. They do this all the time. The wives even stay home and men support them and pay for everything.
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Buy your own groceries and eat your own food. Even better buy each you own house and live separately. |
Exactly. Remember that the “we’re a team” line that PPs are pushing ends when either party decides to leave.There are no guarantees that she benefits from his income at anytime. |
What specialty is your son-in-law in? If oncologist or gynecologist, he will make money in no time. Those specialties are never going to die and those specialists are always going to be wealthy.
If your daughter married him knowing he had student debts and if you were fine then, you should be fine now. If he kept her in the dark before marriage and if his debts surfaced only now, I would be cautious. In general, a married couple should be solving problems together, financial and other. |
If she pays his debt, they should get a post-nup or revise existing pre-nup to protect her in case of a divorce.
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This 100%. I agree with the posters saying that you marry a person, debt and all. What I don't like is that the title says he is "pressuring her." Maybe this is OP being overdramatic. Maybe he has been nagging OP's daughter non-stop since they got married. But either way there needs to be a respectful conversation and not one-sided pressure. OP, I don't know how long they've been married, but if she's having misgivings about the situation, she needs to have a frank conversation with her husband about why she is feeling hesitant to do this. There is probably more to the story than just the debt. And if she can't have a conversation with him without him being defensive or yelling or pressuring with guilt, then that is an answer too. |
You think the person that concerned about all this would now think to draw one up? I think OP is a meddling mother and her daughter isn’t that bothered. |
This. Ask me how I know. |
Also remember the people that are always screaming “we are a team” are usually bringing a lot less to the relationship. |
Is he asking her to pay it all in a lump sum, or to help pay it off over the term of the loan? I agree paying in a lump sum is a big ask and probably not smart, but as a couple they should contribute to the payoff over time, and as his income increases he will contribute a lot. |