Ivy Day. Good luck everyone!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. I’d meet with the advisors who suggested she expand options and see what they think.
2. I honestly think she should go to Harvard. If she/your husband hate it you can always transfer to uva.
3. Their first gen program is excellent.
4. As a Harvard grad, I would say while it is not for everyone, it can be absolutely life changing - expose you to all sorts of interesting people and places and opportunities. It 100 percent changed my life and trajectory for the better.
5. While the name can be intimidating, there are tons of kids just like your daughter there - did great in high school but really nice kids etc etc.
6. She has rest of her life to live near you in VA/go to UVA for med school etc.

I agree with this. I've lived in three different countries now - Boston and Philadelphia are close to you in comparison to what my parents put up with.

I'd be concerned about your daughter's ability to grow if she comes home every weekend vs using this time to do new things and make new connections. If she has lived in your quiet corner of Virginia her whole life, this is a great opportunity to see the wider world. Skype and WhatsApp make the world a whole lot closer.

The grumpiness of earlier postings stems from the bitter realization that many of our kids are not flavor of the month for top universities. Your daughter has been offered opportunities and should grab them.

To be clear, I was not remotely grumpy about it (and I don’t think others were either), just that there had to be some missing information and there was. I think it is absolutely awesome that PPs daughter got into Harvard and I hope she soars.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Congrats to your daughter. She sounds awesome. People are right that these are transitions for everyone. If chooses Harvard and has questions feel free to reach out. I went there and have family there now and happy to chat with her if ever helpful. (I also interview as alum and actually believe it can be very helpful fwiw)

I am the poster. The recent posts have been very encouraging. Yesterday was ecstatic but we are growing a bit more anxious.
Her father wants her to remain near the family. He would rather her go to UVA (1-hour drive from home )
She wants to be a pediatrician and my recent research suggests that UVA would better pre-med option. More and more we
are leaning toward UVA. It just feels like a more comfortable place for her and the family. Any thoughts?

Your daughter has achieved so much. Counselors and teachers believe in her and have lifted her up. You should, too. If you can manage it financially, I think you should let your DD sit with it on her own for a while, and make the decision.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Congrats to your daughter. She sounds awesome. People are right that these are transitions for everyone. If chooses Harvard and has questions feel free to reach out. I went there and have family there now and happy to chat with her if ever helpful. (I also interview as alum and actually believe it can be very helpful fwiw)

I am the poster. The recent posts have been very encouraging. Yesterday was ecstatic but we are growing a bit more anxious.
Her father wants her to remain near the family. He would rather her go to UVA (1-hour drive from home )
She wants to be a pediatrician and my recent research suggests that UVA would better pre-med option. More and more we
are leaning toward UVA. It just feels like a more comfortable place for her and the family. Any thoughts?

What would make you say that? Harvard pre-med acceptance rate to medical school will be notably higher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Brown: Rejected
UPen: accepted
Harvard: accepted
4.6 GPA
11 APs all 5s
1540 SAT
Great EC

URM? Athlete?

I am the poster. I am shocked to see some of these reactions. Here is a little background.
We are in Virginia but not in DVM. She will be indeed the first in the family to attend a 4-year college.
She handled all her college stuff. Father is a blue-collar worker and I work in health care.
At the start of the process, she only applied to two schools: UVA and VCU. But the school called
a meeting and urge us to consider top out-of-state schools. They specifically said that our daughter was
underselling herself. Applying to these schools or even getting accepted was not on our radar until this meeting with the school.
It was at this point, I started doing some research and started reading stuff on this forum.

She also had a good interview. The interviewer specifically said that it was his best interview.

As a 1st family member at college encourage her to reach out to a counselor for questions that parents who went to college usually answer. Don’t be shy about getting help.

There are free tutors especially for writing. Don’t be shy, don’t think she should automatically know how to write at a college level.

Google imposters syndrome… everyone get it , it’s a normal feeling.

Really hard classes like organic Chem… take them in the summer at a Community College and transfer the credit.

Some classes are called weed classes specifically designed hoping students will change majors to something easier like communications.

WHy would you give such random, unsolicited advice? Just because she’s 1st gen doesn’t mean she’ll get imposter syndrome or require tutoring for writing.

That is good advice for every first year...not just first gen

I agree - for everyone. But also agree especially for a first gen from a rural setting. These schools are filled with rich savvy kids who have been in a shark tank HS environment. This will most likely be a very different environment for her.

But any kid should take advantage of anything a school has to offer to help in transition - seek out these opportunities - use them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Congrats to your daughter. She sounds awesome. People are right that these are transitions for everyone. If chooses Harvard and has questions feel free to reach out. I went there and have family there now and happy to chat with her if ever helpful. (I also interview as alum and actually believe it can be very helpful fwiw)

I am the poster. The recent posts have been very encouraging. Yesterday was ecstatic but we are growing a bit more anxious.
Her father wants her to remain near the family. He would rather her go to UVA (1-hour drive from home )
She wants to be a pediatrician and my recent research suggests that UVA would better pre-med option. More and more we
are leaning toward UVA. It just feels like a more comfortable place for her and the family. Any thoughts?

I vote Harvard (unless she hates the idea of cold, longer winters)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My heart sinks at the idea of her dad not letting her go to Harvard and I've never met any of you.
It's kind of like getting Wonka's golden ticket. You go, you don't tear it up or hand it over to someone else. It is literally a once in a lifetime opportunity and not to be missed.
Sorry, I just had to put my 2 cents down.

My sister went to an Ivy and her career has hugely benefitted from it, the people she met and became friends with - both students and professors, have totally changed her life trajectory.

Poster here. Wow! We are truly overwhelmed by all these responses. I made my husband read some of your responses and had tears in his eyes. He is just realizing how big this is. After a long silence, his response was "we raised our daughter with the idea that no mountain is too big to climb. We come from too far... It may be time to fulfill that promise and let her go to Boston."

Thank you for all the responses.

I’m thrilled for her. Seriously, it’s made my day to know about this random kid who has accomplished so much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

NP. I’m openly skeptical of the story of the “ordinary” applicant who got in. There is another hook or the person is a troll.

+1. I know 4 kids at Ivy or Ivy adjacent schools and they're all smart & quirky with pointy ECs.

And those 4 constitute what percentage of total admitted students in the colleges you referred to? You look at a tree and generalize to the forest. Must have a hollow in the left side of your brain.

I’m not the PP but I did used to work in admissions and I agree the story above is likely untrue unless there is another hook not being disclosed. Those stats are simply not enough for the schools listed if the applicant is unhooked.

I believe that you USED to work in admissions.

You do not appear to understand what adcoms are seeking in applicants. Yes, it varies as admissions officers are trying to build a class, but I wonder if you even understand what is most important to the most competitive schools' admissions officers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

NP. I’m openly skeptical of the story of the “ordinary” applicant who got in. There is another hook or the person is a troll.

+1. I know 4 kids at Ivy or Ivy adjacent schools and they're all smart & quirky with pointy ECs.

And those 4 constitute what percentage of total admitted students in the colleges you referred to? You look at a tree and generalize to the forest. Must have a hollow in the left side of your brain.

I’m not the PP but I did used to work in admissions and I agree the story above is likely untrue unless there is another hook not being disclosed. Those stats are simply not enough for the schools listed if the applicant is unhooked.

I believe that you USED to work in admissions.

You do not appear to understand what adcoms are seeking in applicants. Yes, it varies as admissions officers are trying to build a class, but I wonder if you even understand what is most important to the most competitive schools' admissions officers.

But I was precisely correct. There was indeed missing information and she had multiple hooks.

To be clear, I’m thrilled for her — I think she is exactly the kind of person who will do amazing things with her admissions. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being hooked. My point was only that there had to be more hooks, and I was exactly right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My heart sinks at the idea of her dad not letting her go to Harvard and I've never met any of you.
It's kind of like getting Wonka's golden ticket. You go, you don't tear it up or hand it over to someone else. It is literally a once in a lifetime opportunity and not to be missed.
Sorry, I just had to put my 2 cents down.

My sister went to an Ivy and her career has hugely benefitted from it, the people she met and became friends with - both students and professors, have totally changed her life trajectory.

Poster here. Wow! We are truly overwhelmed by all these responses. I made my husband read some of your responses and had tears in his eyes. He is just realizing how big this is. After a long silence, his response was "we raised our daughter with the idea that no mountain is too big to climb. We come from too far... It may be time to fulfill that promise and let her go to Boston."

Thank you for all the responses.

New to the thread and this just made me tear up. Give him extra hugs from all of us. It is hard to send your first get kid into the unknown - something I realized in retrospect about my parents and how hard it was for them to understand my going off to college. And kudos to the kind and generous posters giving sound advice, pointing out resources for first gen students, etc. - this is the best of DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Wow. This is the best post I have ever read on dcurbanmom!
Yay for your husband. Yes! Send her to Boston!

Harvard undergrad wasn’t the easiest thing I ever did - although for sure the hardest part was getting in- but it was life changing!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My heart sinks at the idea of her dad not letting her go to Harvard and I've never met any of you.
It's kind of like getting Wonka's golden ticket. You go, you don't tear it up or hand it over to someone else. It is literally a once in a lifetime opportunity and not to be missed.
Sorry, I just had to put my 2 cents down.

My sister went to an Ivy and her career has hugely benefitted from it, the people she met and became friends with - both students and professors, have totally changed her life trajectory.

Poster here. Wow! We are truly overwhelmed by all these responses. I made my husband read some of your responses and had tears in his eyes. He is just realizing how big this is. After a long silence, his response was "we raised our daughter with the idea that no mountain is too big to climb. We come from too far... It may be time to fulfill that promise and let her go to Boston."

Thank you for all the responses.

I am so happy for your family, and I don't even know you! This is a HUGE opportunity. Don't let it go.

I have a friend from poor circumstances (first gen, single mom, poor and living in the projects), who got into an MD-PhD program, went to Harvard for her residency, and is now working at Stanford as an expert in her field. She met her husband at Harvard too. These schools can be life changing. I'm so glad your family is being open minded. It's probably scary for you, but she'll be okay. Hell, she'll be more than okay.

[Anonymous]

I went to another top Ivy that starts with Y, not H.

Let your daughter go to Harvard!!!

There were a lot of first gen kids back in my day, and that was before "first gen" even had a name. There is so much more support now for this cohort on these elite campuses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Congrats to your daughter. She sounds awesome. People are right that these are transitions for everyone. If chooses Harvard and has questions feel free to reach out. I went there and have family there now and happy to chat with her if ever helpful. (I also interview as alum and actually believe it can be very helpful fwiw)

I am the poster. The recent posts have been very encouraging. Yesterday was ecstatic but we are growing a bit more anxious.
Her father wants her to remain near the family. He would rather her go to UVA (1-hour drive from home )
She wants to be a pediatrician and my recent research suggests that UVA would better pre-med option. More and more we
are leaning toward UVA. It just feels like a more comfortable place for her and the family. Any thoughts?

She has some wonderful choices. Congrats!!!
I wouldn't write off the Ivies. They should have offered you very competitive FA. If that is a factor, contact the FA office and ask about an appeal. We are middle class and pay less than in state UVA tuition. Harvard has a huge endowment and must have offered a hood deal, no?

You can't go wrong with these choices. Go to all the admitted students days/events. Then think about fit and finances and if you need to appeal FA for her top choice.

Congrats!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Acceptance rates - Harvard 3.41%

Yale -4.35%

Both had well north of 50k applicants,

Northeastern had 96k applicants.

Give it a rest. This is an Ivy discussion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I went to another top Ivy that starts with Y, not H.

Let your daughter go to Harvard!!!

There were a lot of first gen kids back in my day, and that was before "first gen" even had a name. There is so much more support now for this cohort on these elite campuses.

+2 from another alum. She has gotten a one in a million chance here. Let her go to Harvard.