Why are some people so bothered by unmedicated birth?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had two pitocin inductions (preeclampsia both times) and so definitely needed an epidural both times as well. Almost impossible to do pitocin without epi. The epidural led to fluid intake both times for my kids that led to not meeting weight gain goals in first 24 hrs, extra hospital time, breastfeeding issues. Also I’ve since read that pitocin is a significant predictor of ADHD which my kids are at risk for already. So I see really valid reasons to attempt unmedicated and say more power to those who do. I am not sure people understand these factors when they say unmedicated people are just being sanctimonious.

Do you not understand what pitocin is?

I definitely do. However, I don’t think it’s common knowledge that pitocin at birth has such a strong connection to adhd diagnoses later. This is not usually discussed. If others were told this by their OB then feel free to share that.

My first result on Google is a meta analysis from 2 years ago and says there is no association between the two, looking at multiple studies. So I’m not sure what outdated research you saw but, no.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8426101/

Did you read what you linked to, beyond just the abstract line? It says multiple high quality studies have found a correlation and that more research is needed. It also explains how oxytocin is linked to neurodevelopmental disorders. I think it is reasonable to have as a data point in a larger decision. Plenty of people would still choose it and that’s fine. My point was more so that people think it’s all about being sanctimonious and crunchy when women decline interventions. They may be unaware that people are concerned about known and/or unknown side effects.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was induced with Cervadil but poorly monitored during my birth. I asked for an epidural but was denied (without checking me) even though I asked to be checked and was told to "give it time" and "it's going to get much worse." Apparently, I wasn't loud enough or agitated enough or something for anyone to take me seriously. I threw up all over myself and had broken capillaries all around my eyes, but my baby was born 20 minutes later. What was most traumatizing was that no one believed me or listened to me. I don't talk about this ever, but remember that not everyone chooses this when you're casually calling people self-involved or self-righteous or whatever.

But here you are, talking about it, unprompted. So there’s that.

On a thread about unmedicated births? Hardly "unprompted."

Well the thread is about “why are people so irritated to hear about a woman having a natural birth?” and many responses said it’s not the natural birth it’s the fact that certain women talk about it unprompted and like they talk unprompted about running a marathon, or going to Harvard. And your response was to tell us your unmediated birth story. Don’t get me wrong, your birth experience sounds horrific and I’m sorry that no one listened to you at the hospital. But it’s a perfect, accidental example of someone sharing their unmediated birth story when nobody asked “tell me your birth story!” . This thread was definitely NOT “tell us how you gave birth”.

Multiple women have shared their birth stories "unprompted" in this thread, yet this is the only person you've attacked. Why is that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was induced with Cervadil but poorly monitored during my birth. I asked for an epidural but was denied (without checking me) even though I asked to be checked and was told to "give it time" and "it's going to get much worse." Apparently, I wasn't loud enough or agitated enough or something for anyone to take me seriously. I threw up all over myself and had broken capillaries all around my eyes, but my baby was born 20 minutes later. What was most traumatizing was that no one believed me or listened to me. I don't talk about this ever, but remember that not everyone chooses this when you're casually calling people self-involved or self-righteous or whatever.

But here you are, talking about it, unprompted. So there’s that.

On a thread about unmedicated births? Hardly "unprompted."

Well the thread is about “why are people so irritated to hear about a woman having a natural birth?” and many responses said it’s not the natural birth it’s the fact that certain women talk about it unprompted and like they talk unprompted about running a marathon, or going to Harvard. And your response was to tell us your unmediated birth story. Don’t get me wrong, your birth experience sounds horrific and I’m sorry that no one listened to you at the hospital. But it’s a perfect, accidental example of someone sharing their unmediated birth story when nobody asked “tell me your birth story!” . This thread was definitely NOT “tell us how you gave birth”.

Multiple women have shared their birth stories "unprompted" in this thread, yet this is the only person you've attacked. Why is that?

It's the only one I read. I can point out the others too if you want. But it sounds like you already saw them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was induced with Cervadil but poorly monitored during my birth. I asked for an epidural but was denied (without checking me) even though I asked to be checked and was told to "give it time" and "it's going to get much worse." Apparently, I wasn't loud enough or agitated enough or something for anyone to take me seriously. I threw up all over myself and had broken capillaries all around my eyes, but my baby was born 20 minutes later. What was most traumatizing was that no one believed me or listened to me. I don't talk about this ever, but remember that not everyone chooses this when you're casually calling people self-involved or self-righteous or whatever.

But here you are, talking about it, unprompted. So there’s that.

On a thread about unmedicated births? Hardly "unprompted."

Well the thread is about “why are people so irritated to hear about a woman having a natural birth?” and many responses said it’s not the natural birth it’s the fact that certain women talk about it unprompted and like they talk unprompted about running a marathon, or going to Harvard. And your response was to tell us your unmediated birth story. Don’t get me wrong, your birth experience sounds horrific and I’m sorry that no one listened to you at the hospital. But it’s a perfect, accidental example of someone sharing their unmediated birth story when nobody asked “tell me your birth story!” . This thread was definitely NOT “tell us how you gave birth”.

Multiple women have shared their birth stories "unprompted" in this thread, yet this is the only person you've attacked. Why is that?

It's the only one I read. I can point out the others too if you want. But it sounds like you already saw them.

Oh- I re read the post- also, probably because the poster gave a lengthy description of her birth experience followed by stating "I don't talk about this, ever". That probably was why it was the most perfect example. "I never talk about this thing that I'm going to describe to you in great detail."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had two pitocin inductions (preeclampsia both times) and so definitely needed an epidural both times as well. Almost impossible to do pitocin without epi. The epidural led to fluid intake both times for my kids that led to not meeting weight gain goals in first 24 hrs, extra hospital time, breastfeeding issues. Also I’ve since read that pitocin is a significant predictor of ADHD which my kids are at risk for already. So I see really valid reasons to attempt unmedicated and say more power to those who do. I am not sure people understand these factors when they say unmedicated people are just being sanctimonious.

Do you not understand what pitocin is?

I definitely do. However, I don’t think it’s common knowledge that pitocin at birth has such a strong connection to adhd diagnoses later. This is not usually discussed. If others were told this by their OB then feel free to share that.

My first result on Google is a meta analysis from 2 years ago and says there is no association between the two, looking at multiple studies. So I’m not sure what outdated research you saw but, no.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8426101/

Did you read what you linked to, beyond just the abstract line? It says multiple high quality studies have found a correlation and that more research is needed. It also explains how oxytocin is linked to neurodevelopmental disorders. I think it is reasonable to have as a data point in a larger decision. Plenty of people would still choose it and that’s fine. My point was more so that people think it’s all about being sanctimonious and crunchy when women decline interventions. They may be unaware that people are concerned about known and/or unknown side effects.

"Results
All observational studies were reviewed, including 4 cohort studies including 2,885,743 participants and 3 case-control studies including 51,135 participants (10,961 with ADHD and 40,174 in control groups) with a sample size of 2,936,878 participants. The pooled estimates of OR and RR did not indicate a significant association between labor induction and ADHD among children (OR, 1.13; 95% CI, 0.90–1.35) and (RR, 1.10; 95% CI, 0.96–1.24).

Conclusions
The findings showed that labor induction is not associated with an increased risk of ADHD among children. However, more studies are needed to investigate the relationship between labor induction and ADHD."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was induced with Cervadil but poorly monitored during my birth. I asked for an epidural but was denied (without checking me) even though I asked to be checked and was told to "give it time" and "it's going to get much worse." Apparently, I wasn't loud enough or agitated enough or something for anyone to take me seriously. I threw up all over myself and had broken capillaries all around my eyes, but my baby was born 20 minutes later. What was most traumatizing was that no one believed me or listened to me. I don't talk about this ever, but remember that not everyone chooses this when you're casually calling people self-involved or self-righteous or whatever.

But here you are, talking about it, unprompted. So there’s that.

On a thread about unmedicated births? Hardly "unprompted."

Well the thread is about “why are people so irritated to hear about a woman having a natural birth?” and many responses said it’s not the natural birth it’s the fact that certain women talk about it unprompted and like they talk unprompted about running a marathon, or going to Harvard. And your response was to tell us your unmediated birth story. Don’t get me wrong, your birth experience sounds horrific and I’m sorry that no one listened to you at the hospital. But it’s a perfect, accidental example of someone sharing their unmediated birth story when nobody asked “tell me your birth story!” . This thread was definitely NOT “tell us how you gave birth”.

Multiple women have shared their birth stories "unprompted" in this thread, yet this is the only person you've attacked. Why is that?

It's the only one I read. I can point out the others too if you want. But it sounds like you already saw them.

Oh- I re read the post- also, probably because the poster gave a lengthy description of her birth experience followed by stating "I don't talk about this, ever". That probably was why it was the most perfect example. "I never talk about this thing that I'm going to describe to you in great detail."

So you’re doing a great job demonstrating how people are actively looking for reasons to attack other people on this topic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was induced with Cervadil but poorly monitored during my birth. I asked for an epidural but was denied (without checking me) even though I asked to be checked and was told to "give it time" and "it's going to get much worse." Apparently, I wasn't loud enough or agitated enough or something for anyone to take me seriously. I threw up all over myself and had broken capillaries all around my eyes, but my baby was born 20 minutes later. What was most traumatizing was that no one believed me or listened to me. I don't talk about this ever, but remember that not everyone chooses this when you're casually calling people self-involved or self-righteous or whatever.

But here you are, talking about it, unprompted. So there’s that.

On a thread about unmedicated births? Hardly "unprompted."

Well the thread is about “why are people so irritated to hear about a woman having a natural birth?” and many responses said it’s not the natural birth it’s the fact that certain women talk about it unprompted and like they talk unprompted about running a marathon, or going to Harvard. And your response was to tell us your unmediated birth story. Don’t get me wrong, your birth experience sounds horrific and I’m sorry that no one listened to you at the hospital. But it’s a perfect, accidental example of someone sharing their unmediated birth story when nobody asked “tell me your birth story!” . This thread was definitely NOT “tell us how you gave birth”.

Multiple women have shared their birth stories "unprompted" in this thread, yet this is the only person you've attacked. Why is that?

It's the only one I read. I can point out the others too if you want. But it sounds like you already saw them.

Oh- I re read the post- also, probably because the poster gave a lengthy description of her birth experience followed by stating "I don't talk about this, ever". That probably was why it was the most perfect example. "I never talk about this thing that I'm going to describe to you in great detail."

So you’re doing a great job demonstrating how people are actively looking for reasons to attack other people on this topic.

I think it's amazing that women can give birth pretty much any way they want to in our country. I also don't really want to hear about it, because it's boring. I've had 4 kids. I know about childbirth. I am not interested in hearing about someone's childbirth. I can't imagine how much LESS interested I'd be if I hadn't given birth before. So again, it's not about if someone chose to have an epidural or not, or chose an elective C section vs a home birth. It's just that I don't care. And I don't encounter many women who want to regale me with stories of their planned c- sections because they understand it's boring to hear about. But I DO encounter many women who want to let me know, some how some way, that they had a natural birth, even if there is no opening in which to easily insert it into the conversation. And that, in my personal opinion, is why some might have the perception that others "bristle" when they talk about their natural births. Similar to how people think others roll their eyes when they talk about running a marathon. The reason, my friends, is because nobody cares and nobody wants to hear about this thing that you did that many, many others have also done and that is not interesting to anyone except for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God intended birth to be painful. He wants women to suffer. My fear is going against God could be seen as a sin. I’d rather suffer for 72 hours rather then all eternity.

How does it feel to be complicit in your own subjugation? You really think any truly loving divine being would want you to suffer and experience unnecessary pain?

Yes I do. I don’t believe in prolonging life in anyway. If I get cancer, have a heart attack or hit by a bus. Let me die .

[Anonymous]

It would have been unpleasant for me because I had a c-section.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God intended birth to be painful. He wants women to suffer. My fear is going against God could be seen as a sin. I’d rather suffer for 72 hours rather then all eternity.

How does it feel to be complicit in your own subjugation? You really think any truly loving divine being would want you to suffer and experience unnecessary pain?

Yes I do. I don’t believe in prolonging life in anyway. If I get cancer, have a heart attack or hit by a bus. Let me die .

God wants women to suffer. Why? Because of Eve? Lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was induced with Cervadil but poorly monitored during my birth. I asked for an epidural but was denied (without checking me) even though I asked to be checked and was told to "give it time" and "it's going to get much worse." Apparently, I wasn't loud enough or agitated enough or something for anyone to take me seriously. I threw up all over myself and had broken capillaries all around my eyes, but my baby was born 20 minutes later. What was most traumatizing was that no one believed me or listened to me. I don't talk about this ever, but remember that not everyone chooses this when you're casually calling people self-involved or self-righteous or whatever.

But here you are, talking about it, unprompted. So there’s that.

On a thread about unmedicated births? Hardly "unprompted."

Well the thread is about “why are people so irritated to hear about a woman having a natural birth?” and many responses said it’s not the natural birth it’s the fact that certain women talk about it unprompted and like they talk unprompted about running a marathon, or going to Harvard. And your response was to tell us your unmediated birth story. Don’t get me wrong, your birth experience sounds horrific and I’m sorry that no one listened to you at the hospital. But it’s a perfect, accidental example of someone sharing their unmediated birth story when nobody asked “tell me your birth story!” . This thread was definitely NOT “tell us how you gave birth”.

Multiple women have shared their birth stories "unprompted" in this thread, yet this is the only person you've attacked. Why is that?

It's the only one I read. I can point out the others too if you want. But it sounds like you already saw them.

Oh- I re read the post- also, probably because the poster gave a lengthy description of her birth experience followed by stating "I don't talk about this, ever". That probably was why it was the most perfect example. "I never talk about this thing that I'm going to describe to you in great detail."

So you’re doing a great job demonstrating how people are actively looking for reasons to attack other people on this topic.

I think it's amazing that women can give birth pretty much any way they want to in our country. I also don't really want to hear about it, because it's boring. I've had 4 kids. I know about childbirth. I am not interested in hearing about someone's childbirth. I can't imagine how much LESS interested I'd be if I hadn't given birth before. So again, it's not about if someone chose to have an epidural or not, or chose an elective C section vs a home birth. It's just that I don't care. And I don't encounter many women who want to regale me with stories of their planned c- sections because they understand it's boring to hear about. But I DO encounter many women who want to let me know, some how some way, that they had a natural birth, even if there is no opening in which to easily insert it into the conversation. And that, in my personal opinion, is why some might have the perception that others "bristle" when they talk about their natural births. Similar to how people think others roll their eyes when they talk about running a marathon. The reason, my friends, is because nobody cares and nobody wants to hear about this thing that you did that many, many others have also done and that is not interesting to anyone except for you.

4 kids later, you can probably save yourself from a lot of boredom and misery by moving on from the expectant/postpartum moms forum.

[Anonymous]

Nobody gives a rats a$$ about your birth story except for other new mothers. So it’s not that you sound naive, it’s that you ARE naive. We also don’t want to hear about your co-sleeping, breastfeeding, baby-led weaning, homemade baby food or your play-based outdoor preschool.

So much work and pressure on women to martyr themselves at the altar of motherhood. Be a mother however you want.

-mom of 2 teens

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was induced with Cervadil but poorly monitored during my birth. I asked for an epidural but was denied (without checking me) even though I asked to be checked and was told to "give it time" and "it's going to get much worse." Apparently, I wasn't loud enough or agitated enough or something for anyone to take me seriously. I threw up all over myself and had broken capillaries all around my eyes, but my baby was born 20 minutes later. What was most traumatizing was that no one believed me or listened to me. I don't talk about this ever, but remember that not everyone chooses this when you're casually calling people self-involved or self-righteous or whatever.

But here you are, talking about it, unprompted. So there’s that.

On a thread about unmedicated births? Hardly "unprompted."

Well the thread is about “why are people so irritated to hear about a woman having a natural birth?” and many responses said it’s not the natural birth it’s the fact that certain women talk about it unprompted and like they talk unprompted about running a marathon, or going to Harvard. And your response was to tell us your unmediated birth story. Don’t get me wrong, your birth experience sounds horrific and I’m sorry that no one listened to you at the hospital. But it’s a perfect, accidental example of someone sharing their unmediated birth story when nobody asked “tell me your birth story!” . This thread was definitely NOT “tell us how you gave birth”.

Multiple women have shared their birth stories "unprompted" in this thread, yet this is the only person you've attacked. Why is that?

It's the only one I read. I can point out the others too if you want. But it sounds like you already saw them.

Oh- I re read the post- also, probably because the poster gave a lengthy description of her birth experience followed by stating "I don't talk about this, ever". That probably was why it was the most perfect example. "I never talk about this thing that I'm going to describe to you in great detail."

So you’re doing a great job demonstrating how people are actively looking for reasons to attack other people on this topic.

I think it's amazing that women can give birth pretty much any way they want to in our country. I also don't really want to hear about it, because it's boring. I've had 4 kids. I know about childbirth. I am not interested in hearing about someone's childbirth. I can't imagine how much LESS interested I'd be if I hadn't given birth before. So again, it's not about if someone chose to have an epidural or not, or chose an elective C section vs a home birth. It's just that I don't care. And I don't encounter many women who want to regale me with stories of their planned c- sections because they understand it's boring to hear about. But I DO encounter many women who want to let me know, some how some way, that they had a natural birth, even if there is no opening in which to easily insert it into the conversation. And that, in my personal opinion, is why some might have the perception that others "bristle" when they talk about their natural births. Similar to how people think others roll their eyes when they talk about running a marathon. The reason, my friends, is because nobody cares and nobody wants to hear about this thing that you did that many, many others have also done and that is not interesting to anyone except for you.

4 kids later, you can probably save yourself from a lot of boredom and misery by moving on from the expectant/postpartum moms forum.

Fair enough! I tend to just scroll the recent topics. But if OP wants to know why some people seem annoyed at stories of unmedicated birth- perhaps she should stop sharing stories of her unmedicated birth unless explicitly asked "did you have an epidural when you gave birth?" and then- and ONLY then- if after answering "no" the person goes on to ask about the birth experience or the reasonings, can OP feel that it would be welcomed for her to elaborate further. Because "did you have an epidural?" is actually just a yes or no question.

[Anonymous]

What irks me the most is when new fathers brag about their wife/gf/partner's unmedicated birth like she's some unsung hero.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nobody gives a rats a$$ about your birth story except for other new mothers. So it’s not that you sound naive, it’s that you ARE naive. We also don’t want to hear about your co-sleeping, breastfeeding, baby-led weaning, homemade baby food or your play-based outdoor preschool.

So much work and pressure on women to martyr themselves at the altar of motherhood. Be a mother however you want.

-mom of 2 teens

This. But just be a martyr quietly.