AITA: Grocery bagging

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you come off as a jerk. While you’re technically correct it was antisocial of you to refuse to help when asked.

It’s not a party, dummy!

Do your damn job.

That’s not what antisocial means, dummy!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had no idea that bagging groceries was so controversial. Or that there were so many DCUMers who think they’re above bagging their own groceries.

You know, virtually all supermarkets have self-checkout and cashier-checkout lanes. If you are willing and able to bag your own groceries, you go to the self-checkout lane. If you want full service, you go to the cashier lanes. It is part of the cashier's job description that they bag groceries.

A cashier can suggest or ask that you bag your groceries, but they should not command it or demand it like the OP's cashier did. Likewise, a customer can accept or decline a polite request. The cashier should have asked like "Are you comfortable bagging your own groceries?" or "Would you mind bagging your own groceries to help save some time?" But OP could have been more polite in declining.

It's not always about being above bagging. Can you tell who has arthritis in their wrists from looking? Can you tell who wants to watch the screen rather than bagging? Can you tell who prefers to stay on the other side of the plastic guard screen instead of coming around it to the end of the lane to bag? Can you tell who just finished a 12 hour shift at their own job and doesn't really want to do yours? There are many reasons why people would decline to bag. It is the cashier's job, so they should be willing to do that part of their job. It's as easy as that. I do even the unsavory and undesirable parts of my job because that's what I'm paid to do. I can ask someone to help with it, but if they decline, I still have to do it.

OP doesn’t have arthritis. She wanted to stare at her phone while someone waited on her. She thinks she’s above bagging her own groceries.

She is paying premium prices at a grocery store that provides customer service. It just becomes increasingly easy for these stores to offload work on to the customer while still enjoying the same high prices. I won't shop anywhere that expects me to do their work without receiving a discount.

You are ridiculous. You aren’t paying a “premium” at freaking Harris teeter and these people aren’t being paid well. I can’t believe how sh*tty humans are to each other these days.

Plus one

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you come off as a jerk. While you’re technically correct it was antisocial of you to refuse to help when asked.

It’s not a party, dummy!

Do your damn job.

That’s not what antisocial means, dummy!

DP

It is not a party but it is everyday life where social values show and mean even more … ridiculous to make requiring some low paid cashier to bag for you yiur hill to die on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mid-morning weekday grocery shopping at Harris Teeter. Naming the time, because this wasn’t Monday night or Saturday morning — store was quiet and uncrowded, with no line behind me and other registers open. Naming the store because I think they try and position themselves with their customer service. I had a small load of groceries — filled three reusable bags. Not a massive shopping trip.

As I wheeled up, the checker announced “We’re going to work as a team. I’m going to scan and you’re going to bag.” I said, “No thanks. I was counting on you to bag my items.” She then frowned and went silent for the duration of the transaction.

I’m physically able to bag my own groceries, and I did it without a second thought during the height of the pandemic when we were worried about contact. I’m happy to do it at Aldi or Lidl, where prices are cheaper because that’s part of the deal. But at a “full-price” regular grocery store, I don’t want to. I’m not getting a discount, and frankly I want to use those few minutes to check my email, send a quick text to someone, update my shopping list, mentally plan the evening scrum of sports/homework/dinner, or just veg out for a few blessed minutes. I don’t refill my own drink at restaurants, I don’t loosen the lug nuts on one wheel while my mechanic rotates the other, and I don’t pre-rake my leaves for the landscapers. I will smile and make small talk and say thank you and gratefully acknowledge their much-appreciated help. But I’m not interested in doing someone else’s job. I’m tired enough just doing my own.

Is bagging your own groceries when asked a thing now? AITA for objecting?

I would have bagged - cashiers make little money and have a boring but important job. What does it hurt to bag your own stuff?

Maybe you should ask them to step aside so you can scan your groceries too? What does it hurt to do that?

.

Does this make you feel self justified about in being a twat?

It is not the same thing at all.

I actually prefer to bag my own groceries as I place things in the way I prefer.
It makes it go faster and is not a big deal.

You can’t answer a question without name calling…maybe you should rethink who the twat is here.

Yeah right that was a snide rhetorical question and obviously not a real question.

It was a false equivalence between overstepping the mark and trying to go cashier’s job for her and merely bagging your own groceries, which I prefer to do anyway .

You’re grasping for the moral high ground here is unconvincing ..

Self awareness isn’t your strong suit, I see.

Social kindness and generosity is clearly not yours …

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mid-morning weekday grocery shopping at Harris Teeter. Naming the time, because this wasn’t Monday night or Saturday morning — store was quiet and uncrowded, with no line behind me and other registers open. Naming the store because I think they try and position themselves with their customer service. I had a small load of groceries — filled three reusable bags. Not a massive shopping trip.

As I wheeled up, the checker announced “We’re going to work as a team. I’m going to scan and you’re going to bag.” I said, “No thanks. I was counting on you to bag my items.” She then frowned and went silent for the duration of the transaction.

I’m physically able to bag my own groceries, and I did it without a second thought during the height of the pandemic when we were worried about contact. I’m happy to do it at Aldi or Lidl, where prices are cheaper because that’s part of the deal. But at a “full-price” regular grocery store, I don’t want to. I’m not getting a discount, and frankly I want to use those few minutes to check my email, send a quick text to someone, update my shopping list, mentally plan the evening scrum of sports/homework/dinner, or just veg out for a few blessed minutes. I don’t refill my own drink at restaurants, I don’t loosen the lug nuts on one wheel while my mechanic rotates the other, and I don’t pre-rake my leaves for the landscapers. I will smile and make small talk and say thank you and gratefully acknowledge their much-appreciated help. But I’m not interested in doing someone else’s job. I’m tired enough just doing my own.

Is bagging your own groceries when asked a thing now? AITA for objecting?

I would have bagged - cashiers make little money and have a boring but important job. What does it hurt to bag your own stuff?

Maybe you should ask them to step aside so you can scan your groceries too? What does it hurt to do that?

.

Does this make you feel self justified about in being a twat?

It is not the same thing at all.

I actually prefer to bag my own groceries as I place things in the way I prefer.
It makes it go faster and is not a big deal.

You can’t answer a question without name calling…maybe you should rethink who the twat is here.

Yeah right that was a snide rhetorical question and obviously not a real question.

It was a false equivalence between overstepping the mark and trying to go cashier’s job for her and merely bagging your own groceries, which I prefer to do anyway .

You’re grasping for the moral high ground here is unconvincing ..

Self awareness isn’t your strong suit, I see.

So making snide rhetorical questions passes for self awareness in your circles does it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I don’t know what the cashier’s earning, and I hope it’s a living wage (naive hope). That said, you weren’t the AH, she was, and as several others have noted, I would know immediately that the person being asked to bag her own purchases would be a woman, likely between 30 and 60. I hate that kind of sh!t and find it disturbingly sexist. If one can bag groceries for a man making valid purchases, that courtesy — that job requirement and duty, let me correct myself — should be granted without pert, obnoxious, manipulative little asides to everyone.

I happen to disagree with the concept that every job out there should be paying a living wage. Minimum wage jobs were never intended to be full support jobs. Minimum wage jobs were originally designed to be supplemental income. These jobs were for people who were in a household that already had one primary wage earner and they needed to supplement. Whether that was a SAH parent who needed extra income, a teen or dependent who wanted personal income, or even a primary earner who needed to earn money, these jobs were intended to augment household income. It was not intended to be one to raise oneself on. The fact that we are turning jobs like supermarket cashiers into full-time, personal or family support jobs is the concern. People should not be looking into these minimal wage, unskilled jobs to be primary support. For one thing, it means that it takes those opportunities away from people who do need the supplemental income and it also puts a higher burden on the employers and customers to support these individuals and possibly their families. If you are an adult that needs to support yourself or your family, a minimum wage job should be a stepping stone to something more rather than a career. Think, it is part of the journey, not the destination.

I think it is wrong to make minimum wage jobs into living wage jobs. I think what we need is free job training for individuals who need to support themselves or their families to advance beyond minimum wage positions.

You are absolutely wrong about that. You clearly know NOTHING about the history of the FLSA, what its provisions are and mean, and why it was passed. Educate yourself before you pretend authority on this. Thanks.

DP, thank you PP for pointing this out.

Grocery checker used to be a unionized job with good pay and benefits. Used to be able to buy a home in Arlington on a giant clerk’s salary. In some states with strong unions, it still is. The grocery stores didn’t want to pay good salaries and benefits so they push self checkout.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mid-morning weekday grocery shopping at Harris Teeter. Naming the time, because this wasn’t Monday night or Saturday morning — store was quiet and uncrowded, with no line behind me and other registers open. Naming the store because I think they try and position themselves with their customer service. I had a small load of groceries — filled three reusable bags. Not a massive shopping trip.

As I wheeled up, the checker announced “We’re going to work as a team. I’m going to scan and you’re going to bag.” I said, “No thanks. I was counting on you to bag my items.” She then frowned and went silent for the duration of the transaction.

I’m physically able to bag my own groceries, and I did it without a second thought during the height of the pandemic when we were worried about contact. I’m happy to do it at Aldi or Lidl, where prices are cheaper because that’s part of the deal. But at a “full-price” regular grocery store, I don’t want to. I’m not getting a discount, and frankly I want to use those few minutes to check my email, send a quick text to someone, update my shopping list, mentally plan the evening scrum of sports/homework/dinner, or just veg out for a few blessed minutes. I don’t refill my own drink at restaurants, I don’t loosen the lug nuts on one wheel while my mechanic rotates the other, and I don’t pre-rake my leaves for the landscapers. I will smile and make small talk and say thank you and gratefully acknowledge their much-appreciated help. But I’m not interested in doing someone else’s job. I’m tired enough just doing my own.

Is bagging your own groceries when asked a thing now? AITA for objecting?

I would have bagged - cashiers make little money and have a boring but important job. What does it hurt to bag your own stuff?

Maybe you should ask them to step aside so you can scan your groceries too? What does it hurt to do that?

.

Does this make you feel self justified about in being a twat?

It is not the same thing at all.

I actually prefer to bag my own groceries as I place things in the way I prefer.
It makes it go faster and is not a big deal.

You can’t answer a question without name calling…maybe you should rethink who the twat is here.

Yeah right that was a snide rhetorical question and obviously not a real question.

It was a false equivalence between overstepping the mark and trying to go cashier’s job for her and merely bagging your own groceries, which I prefer to do anyway .

You’re grasping for the moral high ground here is unconvincing ..

Self awareness isn’t your strong suit, I see.

Social kindness and generosity is clearly not yours …

Really? Because I always bag my own groceries. I would just have a problem if the cashier TOLD me I was going to do it.

But go ahead - make some more baseless assumptions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love bagging my own groceries. I actually am disappointed if a bagger shows up. I group things so it’s easier to put away at home.

And I hate bagging. I move slowly and I get anxious that everyone behind me is impatiently waiting on me. That's why I go to a full service grocery store, so that I can watch the prices, arrange coupons, pull out my credit card, and put the bags back in the cart while someone else bags.

It would be fine to say “sorry, do you mind if I watch the prices instead? I’ll help you bag after” but that’s not what op said. OP was unnecessarily jerkish about the whole thing.

This thread should not be about whether a customer should or shouldn’t bag their groceries. It’s about whether you need to shove it in a service workers face even if they asked you something that was technically wrong of them. It’s always better to be gracious and cooperative.

But the cashier didn't ASK; she ANNOUNCED. And she got a short but polite response from the customer, who was clearly taken aback at being told that she was going to do part of the cashier's job.

I’m aware. You missed the entire point of my post, which is that it doesn’t matter. OP did not respond graciously, and that is why OP ITA. The fact that OP was “taken aback” at being asked to lift a finger is actually the problem….

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mid-morning weekday grocery shopping at Harris Teeter. Naming the time, because this wasn’t Monday night or Saturday morning — store was quiet and uncrowded, with no line behind me and other registers open. Naming the store because I think they try and position themselves with their customer service. I had a small load of groceries — filled three reusable bags. Not a massive shopping trip.

As I wheeled up, the checker announced “We’re going to work as a team. I’m going to scan and you’re going to bag.” I said, “No thanks. I was counting on you to bag my items.” She then frowned and went silent for the duration of the transaction.

I’m physically able to bag my own groceries, and I did it without a second thought during the height of the pandemic when we were worried about contact. I’m happy to do it at Aldi or Lidl, where prices are cheaper because that’s part of the deal. But at a “full-price” regular grocery store, I don’t want to. I’m not getting a discount, and frankly I want to use those few minutes to check my email, send a quick text to someone, update my shopping list, mentally plan the evening scrum of sports/homework/dinner, or just veg out for a few blessed minutes. I don’t refill my own drink at restaurants, I don’t loosen the lug nuts on one wheel while my mechanic rotates the other, and I don’t pre-rake my leaves for the landscapers. I will smile and make small talk and say thank you and gratefully acknowledge their much-appreciated help. But I’m not interested in doing someone else’s job. I’m tired enough just doing my own.

Is bagging your own groceries when asked a thing now? AITA for objecting?

I would have bagged - cashiers make little money and have a boring but important job. What does it hurt to bag your own stuff?

Maybe you should ask them to step aside so you can scan your groceries too? What does it hurt to do that?

.

Does this make you feel self justified about in being a twat?

It is not the same thing at all.

I actually prefer to bag my own groceries as I place things in the way I prefer.
It makes it go faster and is not a big deal.

You can’t answer a question without name calling…maybe you should rethink who the twat is here.

Yeah right that was a snide rhetorical question and obviously not a real question.

It was a false equivalence between overstepping the mark and trying to go cashier’s job for her and merely bagging your own groceries, which I prefer to do anyway .

You’re grasping for the moral high ground here is unconvincing ..

Self awareness isn’t your strong suit, I see.

So making snide rhetorical questions passes for self awareness in your circles does it?

I was talking about the moral high ground comment. Sorry you missed the point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I don’t know what the cashier’s earning, and I hope it’s a living wage (naive hope). That said, you weren’t the AH, she was, and as several others have noted, I would know immediately that the person being asked to bag her own purchases would be a woman, likely between 30 and 60. I hate that kind of sh!t and find it disturbingly sexist. If one can bag groceries for a man making valid purchases, that courtesy — that job requirement and duty, let me correct myself — should be granted without pert, obnoxious, manipulative little asides to everyone.

I happen to disagree with the concept that every job out there should be paying a living wage. Minimum wage jobs were never intended to be full support jobs. Minimum wage jobs were originally designed to be supplemental income. These jobs were for people who were in a household that already had one primary wage earner and they needed to supplement. Whether that was a SAH parent who needed extra income, a teen or dependent who wanted personal income, or even a primary earner who needed to earn money, these jobs were intended to augment household income. It was not intended to be one to raise oneself on. The fact that we are turning jobs like supermarket cashiers into full-time, personal or family support jobs is the concern. People should not be looking into these minimal wage, unskilled jobs to be primary support. For one thing, it means that it takes those opportunities away from people who do need the supplemental income and it also puts a higher burden on the employers and customers to support these individuals and possibly their families. If you are an adult that needs to support yourself or your family, a minimum wage job should be a stepping stone to something more rather than a career. Think, it is part of the journey, not the destination.

I think it is wrong to make minimum wage jobs into living wage jobs. I think what we need is free job training for individuals who need to support themselves or their families to advance beyond minimum wage positions.

You are absolutely wrong about that. You clearly know NOTHING about the history of the FLSA, what its provisions are and mean, and why it was passed. Educate yourself before you pretend authority on this. Thanks.

DP, thank you PP for pointing this out.

Grocery checker used to be a unionized job with good pay and benefits. Used to be able to buy a home in Arlington on a giant clerk’s salary. In some states with strong unions, it still is. The grocery stores didn’t want to pay good salaries and benefits so they push self checkout.

I am more than happy to have a robot do this work. This job can be eliminated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love bagging my own groceries. I actually am disappointed if a bagger shows up. I group things so it’s easier to put away at home.

And I hate bagging. I move slowly and I get anxious that everyone behind me is impatiently waiting on me. That's why I go to a full service grocery store, so that I can watch the prices, arrange coupons, pull out my credit card, and put the bags back in the cart while someone else bags.

It would be fine to say “sorry, do you mind if I watch the prices instead? I’ll help you bag after” but that’s not what op said. OP was unnecessarily jerkish about the whole thing.

This thread should not be about whether a customer should or shouldn’t bag their groceries. It’s about whether you need to shove it in a service workers face even if they asked you something that was technically wrong of them. It’s always better to be gracious and cooperative.

But the cashier didn't ASK; she ANNOUNCED. And she got a short but polite response from the customer, who was clearly taken aback at being told that she was going to do part of the cashier's job.

I’m aware. You missed the entire point of my post, which is that it doesn’t matter. OP did not respond graciously, and that is why OP ITA. The fact that OP was “taken aback” at being asked to lift a finger is actually the problem….

So you’re saying it was totally ok for the cashier to be rude and literally tell OP she was going to bag - that the cashier is in no way an a$$hole?
Just want to make sure I’m reading this correctly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love bagging my own groceries. I actually am disappointed if a bagger shows up. I group things so it’s easier to put away at home.

And I hate bagging. I move slowly and I get anxious that everyone behind me is impatiently waiting on me. That's why I go to a full service grocery store, so that I can watch the prices, arrange coupons, pull out my credit card, and put the bags back in the cart while someone else bags.

It would be fine to say “sorry, do you mind if I watch the prices instead? I’ll help you bag after” but that’s not what op said. OP was unnecessarily jerkish about the whole thing.

This thread should not be about whether a customer should or shouldn’t bag their groceries. It’s about whether you need to shove it in a service workers face even if they asked you something that was technically wrong of them. It’s always better to be gracious and cooperative.

But the cashier didn't ASK; she ANNOUNCED. And she got a short but polite response from the customer, who was clearly taken aback at being told that she was going to do part of the cashier's job.

I’m aware. You missed the entire point of my post, which is that it doesn’t matter. OP did not respond graciously, and that is why OP ITA. The fact that OP was “taken aback” at being asked to lift a finger is actually the problem….

So you’re saying it was totally ok for the cashier to be rude and literally tell OP she was going to bag - that the cashier is in no way an a$$hole?
Just want to make sure I’m reading this correctly.

I’m saying OP’s job is not to stick it to a cashier for being rude. That’s exactly what my first post says. Beyond that, I’m not particularly interested in issuing a verdict on whether the cashier was actually rude or not, since that’s not relevant, and the advice in both cases is the same.

[Anonymous]

I don't mind bagging and always do it so I can get out of there faster if there is no bagger. But recently the guy behind me in line who started checking out as I was paying and leaving was annoyed I wasn't going to stay and bag his groceries. I had to tell him I didn't actually work there and he was on his own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love bagging my own groceries. I actually am disappointed if a bagger shows up. I group things so it’s easier to put away at home.

And I hate bagging. I move slowly and I get anxious that everyone behind me is impatiently waiting on me. That's why I go to a full service grocery store, so that I can watch the prices, arrange coupons, pull out my credit card, and put the bags back in the cart while someone else bags.

It would be fine to say “sorry, do you mind if I watch the prices instead? I’ll help you bag after” but that’s not what op said. OP was unnecessarily jerkish about the whole thing.

This thread should not be about whether a customer should or shouldn’t bag their groceries. It’s about whether you need to shove it in a service workers face even if they asked you something that was technically wrong of them. It’s always better to be gracious and cooperative.

But the cashier didn't ASK; she ANNOUNCED. And she got a short but polite response from the customer, who was clearly taken aback at being told that she was going to do part of the cashier's job.

I’m aware. You missed the entire point of my post, which is that it doesn’t matter. OP did not respond graciously, and that is why OP ITA. The fact that OP was “taken aback” at being asked to lift a finger is actually the problem….

So you’re saying it was totally ok for the cashier to be rude and literally tell OP she was going to bag - that the cashier is in no way an a$$hole?
Just want to make sure I’m reading this correctly.

Is your life so small that you cannot tolerate any impolite behavior? You're no different that those women who freak out because they were 'disrespected'. I've found that my life is happier when I just assume they are having a day and get on with my life but it you prefer to carry individual encounters at the grocery all day, more power to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't mind bagging and always do it so I can get out of there faster if there is no bagger. But recently the guy behind me in line who started checking out as I was paying and leaving was annoyed I wasn't going to stay and bag his groceries. I had to tell him I didn't actually work there and he was on his own.

How do you know he was annoyed you weren’t bagging his groceries?