I hate hosting sleepovers

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:10 yo son has his best friend have sleepovers regularly. She lives across the street from us and they alternate each week between ours and her house. They're always well behaved and it's a delight to have her over. They usually just play together in the backyard till sundown, then change into their PJs and spend the rest of the night playing just dance, wrestling and having burp contests. They can get a little noisy put never to the point of it being an annoyance. By 11 pm they're usually asleep in the den watching a movie. Our son and Larla's sleepovers have never had any issue and we're more than happy to let them continue

On the flip side of this though, once when I was taking care of my niece (2 years younger than our son) while my brother and his wife were on a business trip, we let her have a friend over for a sleepover and it was a nightmare. The girls were rude and obnoxious, bickering and fighting, throwing things around, making mess and they even broke one of our vases. So we've never allowed her to have a friend to sleepover since. So we've had both the best and the worst of sleepovers.

*And his best friend, also forgot to mention some of the quieter things they like to do such playing pretend games, reading together and telling each other scary stories.

[Anonymous]

I hate them, but I deal because other parents reciprocate and my child really, really wants to have the sleepover.

Good memories for the kids, but agghhhh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:10 yo son has his best friend have sleepovers regularly. She lives across the street from us and they alternate each week between ours and her house. They're always well behaved and it's a delight to have her over. They usually just play together in the backyard till sundown, then change into their PJs and spend the rest of the night playing just dance, wrestling and having burp contests. They can get a little noisy put never to the point of it being an annoyance. By 11 pm they're usually asleep in the den watching a movie. Our son and Larla's sleepovers have never had any issue and we're more than happy to let them continue

On the flip side of this though, once when I was taking care of my niece (2 years younger than our son) while my brother and his wife were on a business trip, we let her have a friend over for a sleepover and it was a nightmare. The girls were rude and obnoxious, bickering and fighting, throwing things around, making mess and they even broke one of our vases. So we've never allowed her to have a friend to sleepover since. So we've had both the best and the worst of sleepovers.

This is so sweet. And so ideal. Love this.

[Anonymous]

I hate sleepovers, and have so far avoided having too many, but if ever I relented and agreed to having a friend of my 11 year old come over, I sure as heck wouldn't whine about it, and not on DCUM!

OP, no one put a gun to your head, it's just one night, just try to survive without the whining, OK? You'd rather be here hosting this party than trying to get out of Afghanistan, I'm sure.

[Anonymous]

It was the best thing about Covid, no sleepovers. I forgot how much I hated them too until we let DD and DS each have one on different weekends. They kept us up when when they tried to be considerate and were a mess the next day. DD has gone to a few others and the girls never go to bed. They stay up the entire night and it affects the next two days. I loved doing this as a kid and am trying to remember that.

[Anonymous]

Glad to know I'm not alone. My 6 year old has been begging for sleepovers and I know she's too young and I just don't want to deal with the headache when she's a little older

[Anonymous]

Maybe I am naive having younger kids, but I don't understand why sleepover = no bedtime. I'd rather host 3 sleepovers with a 10pm bedtime than one with a 1am bedtime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I am naive having younger kids, but I don't understand why sleepover = no bedtime. I'd rather host 3 sleepovers with a 10pm bedtime than one with a 1am bedtime.

Yeah the problem is getting them to respect a stated 10pm bedtime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I am naive having younger kids, but I don't understand why sleepover = no bedtime. I'd rather host 3 sleepovers with a 10pm bedtime than one with a 1am bedtime.

Wait til they're 11-12 years and older. Forget 10pm, sometimes they won't fall asleep til 3 or 4 a.m. I have found groups of 2 are more likely to go to be at a semi-reasonable hour, but any more than 3 kids and forget about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I am naive having younger kids, but I don't understand why sleepover = no bedtime. I'd rather host 3 sleepovers with a 10pm bedtime than one with a 1am bedtime.

Yeah the problem is getting them to respect a stated 10pm bedtime.

My 10 yo goes to bed at 10 on school nights and between 11 and midnight on a regular weekend, without a sleepover, as do most of her friends.

[Anonymous]

^She is the youngest with teen siblings. My oldest probably went to bed earlier at that age. But it is what it is and she’s hanging out with us. Her friends also seem to have multiple siblings and similar situations.

[Anonymous]

I don't mind sleepovers but I also don't let my kids (and their friends) be "wild and obnoxious, running all around the house, making such a mess and trying to sneak junk food (after all the junk food I already allowed them to have). They have informed me they won’t be sleeping tonight."

My kids know they are absolutely NOT allowed to be obnoxious and I will give one warning before I send their friend home and punish them for it. They are not allowed to run around the house being wild, they are not allowed to leave a mess (if they make a mess with crafts, they clean it up). There's no sneaking food. They do not get to decide that they aren't sleeping. It's a SLEEPover. I would tell the friend "If you're not going to sleep, you will need to go home, because MY kids are absolutely going to sleep tonight."

You're the adult in charge. You need to take control.

[Anonymous]

I have tween boys and HATE hosting too. I feel like a Scrooge for admitting this. I have a low tolerance for chaos and they’re so chaotic. When you get a group together, the kids are always on their worst behavior. There’s no way to enforce any bedtime. They’re loud, destructive and don’t seem to follow any rules. After our last one, I told my kids were only having one friend over at a time from now on. I’m sure I’ll give in and host again at some point, but I really hate it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I hate sleepovers, and have so far avoided having too many, but if ever I relented and agreed to having a friend of my 11 year old come over, I sure as heck wouldn't whine about it, and not on DCUM!

OP, no one put a gun to your head, it's just one night, just try to survive without the whining, OK? You'd rather be here hosting this party than trying to get out of Afghanistan, I'm sure.

Oh, FFS. Seriously? If your kid is prone to exaggerations and drama, don't wonder why.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe I am naive having younger kids, but I don't understand why sleepover = no bedtime. I'd rather host 3 sleepovers with a 10pm bedtime than one with a 1am bedtime.

Wait til they're 11-12 years and older. Forget 10pm, sometimes they won't fall asleep til 3 or 4 a.m. I have found groups of 2 are more likely to go to be at a semi-reasonable hour, but any more than 3 kids and forget about it.

My kids are older teens now. I've never had a problem with this. They do fall asleep--or at least they are in the room/basement with lights off and being quiet. Just set the expectation, then tell them you will enforce and in what way. That's what most people want. What's the rule, what's the punishment for breaking it, will it be enforced. Easy.