Obsession with survivalism?

[Anonymous]

She's 20. It's her choice. And yes, we backpacked in college and barely told our parents where we were, and that was in far flung remote (not always safe) places not just the US.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She's 20. It's her choice. And yes, we backpacked in college and barely told our parents where we were, and that was in far flung remote (not always safe) places not just the US.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She’s vaccinated and COVID safe. But we’re not lenient.

Oh you need to let go.

[Anonymous]

When I was 20 I did a study abroad year in England. This was before cell phones. It was extremely freeing to know that so long as I had a little money on me, I could just go places and figure it out.

You can't forbid this, because she's an adult. You can refuse to fund it but I think that's unwise. Be her partner in picking a place and time, and give her a budget if you can afford to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. It’s my daughter, and she won’t tell me/doesn’t know where.

She probably doesn't WANT to tell you where because she's scared you'll follow her in a trench coat and sunglasses as if you're Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen in a spy video.

[Anonymous]

When I was traveling abroad at that age, I agreed to call my parents every week from wherever I was (using a pay phone in those days). Maybe work on establishing something like that if she won't tell you her plans or where she is going (she might not even know).

[Anonymous]

We need a parent of adults board. Your child isn't a tween or a teen!

[Anonymous]

When I was 20 I travelled around Europe by myself, and also went on solo backpacking trips in the wilderness by myself. She will be fine.

[Anonymous]

It's totally fine, and this is not what I'd describe as survivalism. I think the real issue is that she doesn't want to tell you where she's going.

Do you have a strained relationship with her?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I was traveling abroad at that age, I agreed to call my parents every week from wherever I was (using a pay phone in those days). Maybe work on establishing something like that if she won't tell you her plans or where she is going (she might not even know).

Me too. (I'll add that 25 years later I STILL call my parents once a week from wherever I am; the habit stuck.)

[Anonymous]

Lol. I thought this thread was about in the woods/living off the grid survivalism. My tween, while I wouldn’t say he is obsessed, he is very interested in this and we support this interest.

A 20 year old traveling on their own to a city? Did it all the time in my early 20s. Not the same as digging a hole to poop in the woods.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I was traveling abroad at that age, I agreed to call my parents every week from wherever I was (using a pay phone in those days). Maybe work on establishing something like that if she won't tell you her plans or where she is going (she might not even know).

Me too. (I'll add that 25 years later I STILL call my parents once a week from wherever I am; the habit stuck.)

ight

Me three! Sunday nights from a pay phone in Europe, now Sunday nights from my couch.

[Anonymous]

Pretty sure a 20-year-old adult doesn’t need you to “allow” anything.

[Anonymous]

Wow. OP. You're a horrible parent

[Anonymous]

Oh dumb little OP. In a few years you'll be wondering why your mid 20s kid wants nothing to do with her control freak parent. Or you'll have failed her so much as a parent that she will be living with you because she has no idea how to survive on her own. Either way, you messed up as a parent.