Teen wants to cook, but...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope. Cooks don’t need to clean. Everybody that consumes cleans. It’s not a secret the cook is cooking, swing in early and do some so it’s not a lot at the end.

It's fair for the cook to stack some pots and bowls in the sink to be cleaned by the consumers after the meal, but not fair to leave the kitchen like a tornado hit it.

[Anonymous]

Hang out and cook with her! Chat and wash as you go and you can bond at the same time.

When we started having our kids help put away the clean dishes from the dishwasher we had some collateral damage, with chipped bowls and plates, but we still let them do it, they became more careful, and we replaced them eventually, but now they do a great job and it’s all good.

Worth putting forth the effort and the cleanup reminders etc

[Anonymous]

Ever since they were in preschool, they're taught to clean up toys, tables, etc. I don't know why some PPs encouraged the teen to just leave the mess behind. In every culinary school, students are taught to keep the working area and kitchen clean.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cook with her and help her clean.

The cook is not supposed to clean.

Uh no. You’re not getting what’s happening. In reality adult cooks clean up as they go so there aren’t dirty cutting boards and counter spills all over the kitchen. This saying applies to AFTER meal clean-up. This means the cook doesn’t clean up the plates and store leftovers. Everyone cleans up as they go and yes, it’s a learned skill. That means the teens need to practice and actually learn how to cook.

Nope. Cooks don’t need to clean. Everybody that consumes cleans. It’s not a secret the cook is cooking, swing in early and do some so it’s not a lot at the end.

Ha! In that case I never ever want to eat what the cook is making. And it sounds like OP doesn’t either…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cook with her and help her clean.

The cook is not supposed to clean.

Uh no. You’re not getting what’s happening. In reality adult cooks clean up as they go so there aren’t dirty cutting boards and counter spills all over the kitchen. This saying applies to AFTER meal clean-up. This means the cook doesn’t clean up the plates and store leftovers. Everyone cleans up as they go and yes, it’s a learned skill. That means the teens need to practice and actually learn how to cook.

Nope. Cooks don’t need to clean. Everybody that consumes cleans. It’s not a secret the cook is cooking, swing in early and do some so it’s not a lot at the end.

Ha! In that case I never ever want to eat what the cook is making. And it sounds like OP doesn’t either…

You sound like a super selfish controlling family member.

Our family is a team. So yea, we eat what the cook is making snd we clean up. You are acting like a toddler eating your own food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teach her tools to clean as you go. It’s - in my opinion - the only way to cook, and you’d be giving her an important skill she’ll value when it’s her kitchen.

Yep. Otherwise you are just setting her up for failure.

"Hon, the meat you diced the raw chicken with goes directly into the dishwasher. Don't put it in the sink". "Let's pour the brownie mix into a disposable aluminum pan. Makes cleanup so much easier and we can use a sharp enough against it too as opposed to the Teflon pan".

You get the picture.

[Anonymous]

I assume her cooking is like my cooking when I’m trying to get dinner on the table but the baby also needs me — eggshells and cilantro stems and garlic paper and dirty measuring spoons on the counter and spice jars left open. That’s totally not acceptable (unless she’s also dealing with a baby, in which case why). That’s not the kind of “everyone else cleans up” that goes along with cooking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cook with her and help her clean.

The cook is not supposed to clean.

Uh no. You’re not getting what’s happening. In reality adult cooks clean up as they go so there aren’t dirty cutting boards and counter spills all over the kitchen. This saying applies to AFTER meal clean-up. This means the cook doesn’t clean up the plates and store leftovers. Everyone cleans up as they go and yes, it’s a learned skill. That means the teens need to practice and actually learn how to cook.

Nope. Cooks don’t need to clean. Everybody that consumes cleans. It’s not a secret the cook is cooking, swing in early and do some so it’s not a lot at the end.

Ha! In that case I never ever want to eat what the cook is making. And it sounds like OP doesn’t either…

You sound like a super selfish controlling family member.

Our family is a team. So yea, we eat what the cook is making snd we clean up. You are acting like a toddler eating your own food.

Families are teams but team members shouldn’t expect others to clean up their pet projects.

[Anonymous]

My teen son does this...he does clean up but usually it's not done very well (still flour in the bowl he thinks he washed; stuff on the stove that he did not notice; etc.) As long as he makes a good effort at cleaning I decided I am ok even if I have to do another round sometimes. He has not broken stuff yet...

[Anonymous]

What about getting her into a cooking class? Or watching TV/YouTube cooking shows with her?

[Anonymous]

She needs to clean as she cooks. And she's needs to be gentler with the items she's using so they don't break. If it was once - well, accidents happen. But if it happens each time she cooks then that's going to come out of her money to replace.

[Anonymous]

My kids love to cook. They know my kitchen better be immaculate when they finish.

[Anonymous]

Collaborate problem solving.

"I love it when you cook and I want to encourage you to cook for us! But I have a problem. I don't want to have to clean a really messy kitchen when you are done.

Can you tell me how you are feeling when you are cooking and how you feel about cleaning up after?"

Whatever she says -- LISTEN to her. Don't argue with her.

Empathize with whatever she says. Try to see it from her point of view. Maybe she is exhausted after the end of cooking. Maybe she just doesn't notice the mess at all.

"Is there any way we both get what we want? You can cook without interruption but I'm not left with a dirty kitchen before bed?"

Brainstorm solutions.

- a large soapy dishpan to dump stuff
- measure all ingredients over the six; mix in a bowl in the sink so spills are contained.
- a large paper towel under cutting board to contain scraps
- offer to clean the kitchen first if necessary so she has room to work
- measure ingredients using the same cups and tablespoons do reduce the cleaning load
- reuse mixing bowls if possible
- use wax paper on top of cutting boards to keep boards clean
- make use of two minute waits to clean as you go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teach her tools to clean as you go. It’s - in my opinion - the only way to cook, and you’d be giving her an important skill she’ll value when it’s her kitchen.

This! It's how I cook, and what I taught my teens. Put things away (spices, the flour, the sugars, etc.) as you move through the recipe and don't need them anymore. Keep any spices you need together on the countertop out of the way so you can wipe down the open counter space as you go. Stop a few times as you go to put dirties in the dishwasher. You'll end with a much less intimidating cleanup.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cook with her and help her clean.

The cook is not supposed to clean.

Uh no. You’re not getting what’s happening. In reality adult cooks clean up as they go so there aren’t dirty cutting boards and counter spills all over the kitchen. This saying applies to AFTER meal clean-up. This means the cook doesn’t clean up the plates and store leftovers. Everyone cleans up as they go and yes, it’s a learned skill. That means the teens need to practice and actually learn how to cook.

Nope. Cooks don’t need to clean. Everybody that consumes cleans. It’s not a secret the cook is cooking, swing in early and do some so it’s not a lot at the end.

Ha! In that case I never ever want to eat what the cook is making. And it sounds like OP doesn’t either…

You sound like a super selfish controlling family member.

Our family is a team. So yea, we eat what the cook is making snd we clean up. You are acting like a toddler eating your own food.

Families are teams but team members shouldn’t expect others to clean up their pet projects.

Making food for others is not a pet project.