Any moms who took a step back from big job?

[Anonymous]

Trying to decide whether to go from big law to government and following this thread. With the recent pay hikes in big law, feels foolish to leave $350K-400K a year on the table for a government job that would give me a few extra hours a day.

[Anonymous]

I ultimately left work entirely. I knew my job (stressful and unpredictable as it was) was easier than being with my kids full time, and especially after this pandemic year that has definitely been my experience. I feel like I went in with my eyes open, so while it has been hard I knew it would be hard. It has been rewarding too. I've had a lot of those sweet moments I hated that I was missing. We've also had some behavior and health issues with one of my kids that we had small inklings about while I was working, but boy have we realized they are MUCH more significant than we had dreamed. I can't imagine how much longer it would have taken us to get where we are now if we were relying on second hand info from care givers. Frankly, I don't think our care giver was 100% forthcoming with some things. I think she wanted us to feel like she had things more under control than she did. I empathize with you OP, I really do. You have a choice (which means you're very lucky). It feels like it is a one way decision (though plenty of women go back to work at some point). It feels like you carry the weight of the world on your shoulders in making this decision (and it will impact your family). But your family is impacted whichever way you choose and nobody knows exactly what the future holds. Looking at the information you have now, try to make the decision that will leave you with the fewest regrets and the most potential for a wonderful life. If you're earning over $200K and that is 40% of your HHI, you clearly have enough to live on just one income. Choosing to work is a completely valid choice, but don't let yourself get wrapped up in the DCUM bubble of thinking you have to have millions saved to be a responsible parent.

[Anonymous]

You need to go do marketing for a large or small government contractor. My DH is a lawyer and had worked for several of these - at none of them does anyone work more than 40 hours and in reality it’s more like 35 (barring some unusual circumstance.)