Choosing the sex of a transfer if already doing genetic testing

[Anonymous]

I think it is unethical to allow choice. They should automatically use the best looking embryo.

[Anonymous]

Girl embryos are stronger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Timely question. We don’t know the gender, but we have 5 normals that all day 5 and have the same grade. We were all about not choosing, but now it’s a bit weird that someone else will choose and it won’t be based on quality, since they are all the same. We asked the clinic how they would choose and we are waiting to hear back.

Although honestly I don’t really have a gender preference so we will probably just make them pick.

OP here. Same thoughts. (Although I don't have results back so this might be a totally moot issue overall.) I didn't like the idea of choosing but the idea of another human doing the choosing seems off to me. If the clinic responds to your question, I'd be curious to know.


Thanks for the thoughtful responses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mom of a boy #1 and girl #2 here, I would pick a girl if you ever want to feel like having another child. There are some crazy girl babies, but boys will run you ragged 100%.

This is ridiculous and not helpful towards OPs question. Signed, mother of an extremely calm, easy 6 year old boy who slept 12 hours through the night starting at 9 weeks and spends much of the day quietly reading.

You, my friend, are the exception and not the rule! Signed, mother of 2 boys and 1 girl, all IVF

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My embryos were heavily skewed towards one sex, like I had four of one sex and one of the other. For my first transfer I chose the sex that I had the most of, that way, if it did not take, I wouldn’t feel like I lost my only chance for the sex I only had one of. I was worried it being my first transfer I may find some other infertility issue related to implantation during the process that led to failure. Does that make sense? I want more than one and ideally different genders, so that factored into my decision as well.

OH here. Yes, that makes sense! The first transfer could be the riskiest if you uncover an implantation problem. thank you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Timely question. We don’t know the gender, but we have 5 normals that all day 5 and have the same grade. We were all about not choosing, but now it’s a bit weird that someone else will choose and it won’t be based on quality, since they are all the same. We asked the clinic how they would choose and we are waiting to hear back.

Although honestly I don’t really have a gender preference so we will probably just make them pick.

OP here. Same thoughts. (Although I don't have results back so this might be a totally moot issue overall.) I didn't like the idea of choosing but the idea of another human doing the choosing seems off to me. If the clinic responds to your question, I'd be curious to know.


Thanks for the thoughtful responses.

That was my feeling. If a human was choosing and all other things being equal (quality,etc) I felt it should be me. However when push came to shove, there was no choice. Out of 6 blastocysts only 1 was euploid (and 1 indeterminate) so obviously the euploid one was transferred.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mom of a boy #1 and girl #2 here, I would pick a girl if you ever want to feel like having another child. There are some crazy girl babies, but boys will run you ragged 100%.

This is ridiculous and not helpful towards OPs question. Signed, mother of an extremely calm, easy 6 year old boy who slept 12 hours through the night starting at 9 weeks and spends much of the day quietly reading.

Personally, I needed a VERY large gap. Most of my friends with boys were the same. Obviously I don't know you, but not a single friend with a boy had an easy go of it.

Then get new friends.

- mom to three boys

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it is unethical to allow choice. They should automatically use the best looking embryo.

The question assumes there are embryos of identical quality but different sex.

[Anonymous]

I had 3 boys in 3 years.... They are so cute and easy

[Anonymous]

I know it’s anecdotal, but my son is the gentlest and sweetest of the three (two other girls).

[Anonymous]

We decided not to choose. Very happy with the outcome. Good luck, OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm looking for perspectives from people who have done IVF with genetic testing: did you select the sex of your embryos for transfer?

We are doing genetic testing for age reasons and will be able to find out the sex. The sex has never been that important to me. In fact, part of me is tempted to merely ask the doctor to place the best-looking embryo. In the event we are able to have two children, perhaps my ideal would be one of each. But this journey to even getting pregnant has been so difficult I am not going to tempt fate at this point.

Did you choose? Leave it to the embryologist? What went into your decision? Anything that you regretted later? Thanks.

We did full genetic testing, including the sex, and transferred the sex we wanted. If you have PGS results, looks don't come into play.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm looking for perspectives from people who have done IVF with genetic testing: did you select the sex of your embryos for transfer?

We are doing genetic testing for age reasons and will be able to find out the sex. The sex has never been that important to me. In fact, part of me is tempted to merely ask the doctor to place the best-looking embryo. In the event we are able to have two children, perhaps my ideal would be one of each. But this journey to even getting pregnant has been so difficult I am not going to tempt fate at this point.

Did you choose? Leave it to the embryologist? What went into your decision? Anything that you regretted later? Thanks.

We did full genetic testing, including the sex, and transferred the sex we wanted. If you have PGS results, looks don't come into play.

Aren’t they still graded and therefore ranked?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm looking for perspectives from people who have done IVF with genetic testing: did you select the sex of your embryos for transfer?

We are doing genetic testing for age reasons and will be able to find out the sex. The sex has never been that important to me. In fact, part of me is tempted to merely ask the doctor to place the best-looking embryo. In the event we are able to have two children, perhaps my ideal would be one of each. But this journey to even getting pregnant has been so difficult I am not going to tempt fate at this point.

Did you choose? Leave it to the embryologist? What went into your decision? Anything that you regretted later? Thanks.

We did full genetic testing, including the sex, and transferred the sex we wanted. If you have PGS results, looks don't come into play.

Aren’t they still graded and therefore ranked?

In my experience, yes. Maybe PPs were all ranked the same so doctor didn’t mention it? But at least at SGF, PGS embryos are still graded.

[Anonymous]

We let the RE choose the one he thought had the best odds of success, but we did end up opting to find out the gender of that embryo and the other remaining one after he told us his preference. I will admit I was excited the one the RE picked was also in line with my slight gender preference. It was fun knowing from the very beginning of the pregnancy.

That said we are now on the fence on whether to try for a second with the other embryo and it is pretty weird knowing its gender. Envisioning the sibling we may or may not have.

My advice would be it doesn’t matter if you pick or RE does - personal preference. But if you don’t pick, I’d only find out the gender one at a time or as you transfer each embryo.