Should I change driving instructors again?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am always touched when DCUM-ers take the opportunity to be kind and generous, but this is not such a thread. My goodness.

OP, good for you for overcoming your fears and getting back out there. I know it can be daunting. I think you just have to communicate very openly about what kind of guidance you need from your instructor before your lesson. I would make it clear that I have no experience, despite my age, and apologize in advance for asking lots of questions. You’ll have to be proactive.

If a driving instructor is harsh or sarcastic, I would request another. But the fact that your most recent person didn’t teach you how to hold the wheel doesn’t mean you need a new instructor; imagine if you had asked them, they would have showed you. The most important quality fir your driving instructor is patience.

I just completed driving lessons this summer while in my 40s and agree with all of the above. I think you need to consider what your current driving instructor might be thinking. They might be waiting to see what you CAN do. They might not want to overwhelm you with minutia while you are trying to figure things out. Ask if you have questions, but don't let your stress make you think badly of them, and it is super stressful. I was miserable taking lessons and then miserable as a new driver. Now I've been driving for about 6 months and it really is okay. You can do this!

[Anonymous]

OP,

Do you have a disability? You sound like you do. That’s fine. You could tell the instructor so that they adjust their teaching accordingly. My son has multiple disabilities and I will make sure to warn the driving school in advance. He will need many more lessons than the average person.

As others have said, paying for a service doesn’t mean you wait for it to fall into your lap. The instructor can’t guess what you want if you don’t ask. Different instructors will teach differently. Some may be a better fit for you but it doesn’t mean the others are bad. This one probably wanted to see how you did without stressing you out. If you need anything, just ask!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You should contact I Drive Smart and sign up for their course as well as any extra behind the wheel hours you need. Be sure to tell the in car instructor(s) you are a complete beginner and a little confused about proper technique. No driving instructor should be impatient or critical. You pay them not to be. The ones I had to learn special techniques always reviewed the fundamentals, including seat positioning and proper hand position and turning techniques for the steering wheel.

+1 My kids took both the classroom and behind the wheel classes with I Drive Smart. I highly recommend them. https://www.idrivesmart.com/

[Anonymous]

Have you asked these questions? Why wouldn't you just ask right as you are getting in the car before you even turn it on, "is my seat in the right spot? How far from the wheel do I want to be?" While you're at it, ask about all your mirrors.

[Anonymous]

I don’t agree with most on here. OP, you are not being unreasonable with wanting an instructor to help you figure out how to position your seat. That is ver very impressed. It goes along with how far you should be from the steering wheel and pedals and airbags and how your mirrors should be adjusted. That is a safety issue. As far as turning the wheel, that is also reasonable. Try I Drive Smart. But tell them you need the absolute basics, like how to turn the wheel. They have very good instructors.

[Anonymous]

The common denominator is you.
The instructors are fine, your expectations are out of line.
Tell the instructors you have anxiety and need basic instruments EVERYTHING from turning the wheel to adjusting your seat.
Good luck, deal with you anxiety.

[Anonymous]

Most instructors don't teach people how to drive. Most of driving is common sense. The instructors are there to get you time behind the wheel and to, hopefully, keep you from doing something really stupid while you are getting that time

[Anonymous]

How does one teach turning the steering wheel?!
You should not drive. There is something wrong you if you don't know how to turn the wheel.
Perhaps some perception disability?

[Anonymous]

OP I think you need to just hire a driver or live in a place where you never need to drive anywhere ever.

Agree with others - this is a you issue. Some people are just not cut out to drive.

[Anonymous]

How the hell did OP get an anxiety diagnosis just because of what she wrote? No one likes a mean and sarcastic instructor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Technically, you should use "shuffle" steering. However, as a starting driver turning the wheel with the"approved" method way down on the list of priorities. The "approved" hand position is 9 and 3 o'clock. Most use 10 and 2. Again, this is the level of detail you don't need to know when learning to drive. Focus on staying in your lane, controlling your speed, watching for problems ahead. Identify, Predict, Decide, Execute. Stop worrying about trivia.

Stop so you can just still see the other cars wheels. Some like more. Some like less. You can always step out with a tape measure, but if you are that OCD, you shouldn't be driving.

Shuffle steering is considered outmoded by advanced driving instructors.

But I like and use it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is a Scandinavian expression about how if everywhere you go smells of crap, it is time to look under your own shoe.

A normal instructor would not expect to have to tell you where to put your seat or how to hold the wheel. You should relax and enjoy the lessons. Alternatively, ask yourself if driving is really for you. Many people never learn and havd cery hsppy lives. It isn’t for everyone.

This is not true. Good instructors assume nothing and always begin with the fundamentals. They may not dwell on them, but they begin with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most instructors don't teach people how to drive. Most of driving is common sense. The instructors are there to get you time behind the wheel and to, hopefully, keep you from doing something really stupid while you are getting that time

You are misinformed. There is a vast difference between somehow muddling through and becoming a skillful driver.

[Anonymous]

OP if you are in VA there are a ton of terrible driving teachers. You don't need much of anything to get started as a teacher and there's no oversight. Some instructors just have the kids drive around and run errands for them while the instructors talk on their cell phones -- easy money for the instructor. My DC's teacher was one of these and I had no idea that it could be such a nightmare. I thought they were all probably about the same and I could just pick the first one I found! You are totally correct to be anxious; my DC hated driving for a while after that experience. With my second DC I definitely asked around and did some research -- much better experience.

Find one that has good reviews. The ones that are former police officers, or Moms behind the wheel, or something like that, they tend to be better than the ones that are just one person with their own car. Maybe go to the Teen Forum on this site and ask there for ones near where you live. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most instructors don't teach people how to drive. Most of driving is common sense. The instructors are there to get you time behind the wheel and to, hopefully, keep you from doing something really stupid while you are getting that time

You are misinformed. There is a vast difference between somehow muddling through and becoming a skillful driver.

Unless you’re taking a defensive driving class or a track class, experience is the way most people learn.