How do you balance forcing a pre-K kid to learn with not making them hate school?

[Anonymous]

Buy some different brand workbooks, let her pick one and work with them - Dollar Tree, Kumon, Brain Quest are all nice. 15 minutes a day or a few pages.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I appreciate all of the resources, and I agree about the importance of play (and that's most of what my kid does all day).

But she's enrolled in online public preschool and the public preschool program is VERY focused on things like practicing letters, copying sentences, etc. The assigned exercises are all optional, and we've barely done them this year, but as K gets closer, I've been feeling some need to get her ready for what it will be like.

It's interesting to hear on this board how inappropriate academics are for 4 year olds and then to experience the intensely academic focus of public preK. I asked my kid's teacher about this--inquiring as to whether we might use a tiny bit of one class period for the kids to just talk to one another, do a show and tell, etc., and she said that their goal is kindergarten readiness, which means she wants all kids to be able to start to sound out words (or just the first sound in a word), write within lines, write all numbers, complete worksheets on things like sequencing, etc.

It's hard to strike the balance between following my instinct (i.e. learn through play) and knowing that overly academic K will start soon.

[Anonymous]

Take her out of that program, or she’ll just learn to hate academics. Let her be a four year old child for now.

[Anonymous]

The answer to your question is that you don’t. If she can’t be in person, then find a friend she can play with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I appreciate all of the resources, and I agree about the importance of play (and that's most of what my kid does all day).

But she's enrolled in online public preschool and the public preschool program is VERY focused on things like practicing letters, copying sentences, etc. The assigned exercises are all optional, and we've barely done them this year, but as K gets closer, I've been feeling some need to get her ready for what it will be like.

It's interesting to hear on this board how inappropriate academics are for 4 year olds and then to experience the intensely academic focus of public preK. I asked my kid's teacher about this--inquiring as to whether we might use a tiny bit of one class period for the kids to just talk to one another, do a show and tell, etc., and she said that their goal is kindergarten readiness, which means she wants all kids to be able to start to sound out words (or just the first sound in a word), write within lines, write all numbers, complete worksheets on things like sequencing, etc.

It's hard to strike the balance between following my instinct (i.e. learn through play) and knowing that overly academic K will start soon.

K will bit start soon. K will start in 4 months. That’s a long time for a 4 year old. Leave her be. And turn on Sesame Street.

PS - there is kind of no such thing as academic K readiness. Some kids will show up reading, some won’t know their arse from a hole in the ground. Your daughter sounds like she’ll be like most of the kids in K - somewhere in between the two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Drop the rope. She’s super young, it’s a pandemic, she’ll be fine with formal learning in school.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I appreciate all of the resources, and I agree about the importance of play (and that's most of what my kid does all day).

But she's enrolled in online public preschool and the public preschool program is VERY focused on things like practicing letters, copying sentences, etc. The assigned exercises are all optional, and we've barely done them this year, but as K gets closer, I've been feeling some need to get her ready for what it will be like.

It's interesting to hear on this board how inappropriate academics are for 4 year olds and then to experience the intensely academic focus of public preK. I asked my kid's teacher about this--inquiring as to whether we might use a tiny bit of one class period for the kids to just talk to one another, do a show and tell, etc., and she said that their goal is kindergarten readiness, which means she wants all kids to be able to start to sound out words (or just the first sound in a word), write within lines, write all numbers, complete worksheets on things like sequencing, etc.

It's hard to strike the balance between following my instinct (i.e. learn through play) and knowing that overly academic K will start soon.

This is outrageous. Not you, OP -- I understand your bind. Your child is enrolled in public PK, this is what they are offering you. You are trying to comply with what they are offering.

What they are offering is incorrect. This is not how 4 yr olds learn. Period. Your PK teacher almost certainly knows this. No PK teacher with any experience will actually advocate for online academic instruction for 4 yr olds. Sure, maybe an optional hour or two a week if they are interested. But daily academic instruction? No, that is ridiculous. As you are already sensing, it will destroy their interest in learning.

Public PKs are generally more academically rigorous than private PKs because of the intense focus on testing and achievement in public schools, linked directly to school funding. But in an in-person public PK program, that academic rigor is mitigated by the fact that the kids are also getting a lot of what they actually need, which is socio-emotional learning from being in a group setting with same-age kids, led by skilled ECE teachers who hopefully know how to guide them through the process of learning about the world, relating to one another, building vocabulary through ordinary interactions, engaging in free play, hands-on experiences, art, and music. Yes, the teacher might also drill the kids on letters and numbers even though there's no evidence that this actually helps with learning acquisition later. But they'll get all the other good stuff, and some kids actually take to the academic focus, so it winds up being okay in the end.

Online PK strips out all the best things about PK and leaves you just with the "academic rigor", the least important and probably unnecessary part! That's really bad!

Do not make your kid do anymore DL. Don't worry about learning numbers and letters right now. I mean it. Trust your instincts, as they are correct. It is upsetting that your child's school, school district, and teacher (all of whom know better) are subjecting your kid to this. They are doing it because they lack the will or creativity to do what should have been done last summer, and come up with an alternative option for young learners (whether that was in-person school, biweekly play dates, simply sending learning guides home with parents, literally anything other than planting 4 yr olds in front of computer screens for hours a day to "learn their letters" OMG that is the dumbest possible way to handle this).

You won't get in trouble, your child will be fine. Please stop making your kid do DL. Please.

[Anonymous]

OMG you sound horrible. Leave your kid alone.

Guess what your child will spend all of kindergarten learning? Letters and sounding out words. Counting addition/subtraction up to 10. That’s it. There’s so much angst about kindergarten readiness, but the kids are going to be working on this stuff all year. And they’re still going to teach reading in 1st grade because not every kid learns by the end of K. They work on handwriting all through elementary.

Let your kid play.

[Anonymous]

If the exercises are optional, just don't do them. Doesn't seem like anyone is forcing your hand here. Give her some coloring books, glue, kid-sized scissors, paint/crayons and let her go to town. You're stressing both of you out unnecessarily.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I appreciate all of the resources, and I agree about the importance of play (and that's most of what my kid does all day).

But she's enrolled in online public preschool and the public preschool program is VERY focused on things like practicing letters, copying sentences, etc. The assigned exercises are all optional, and we've barely done them this year, but as K gets closer, I've been feeling some need to get her ready for what it will be like.

It's interesting to hear on this board how inappropriate academics are for 4 year olds and then to experience the intensely academic focus of public preK. I asked my kid's teacher about this--inquiring as to whether we might use a tiny bit of one class period for the kids to just talk to one another, do a show and tell, etc., and she said that their goal is kindergarten readiness, which means she wants all kids to be able to start to sound out words (or just the first sound in a word), write within lines, write all numbers, complete worksheets on things like sequencing, etc.

It's hard to strike the balance between following my instinct (i.e. learn through play) and knowing that overly academic K will start soon.

This is outrageous. Not you, OP -- I understand your bind. Your child is enrolled in public PK, this is what they are offering you. You are trying to comply with what they are offering.

What they are offering is incorrect. This is not how 4 yr olds learn. Period. Your PK teacher almost certainly knows this. No PK teacher with any experience will actually advocate for online academic instruction for 4 yr olds. Sure, maybe an optional hour or two a week if they are interested. But daily academic instruction? No, that is ridiculous. As you are already sensing, it will destroy their interest in learning.

Public PKs are generally more academically rigorous than private PKs because of the intense focus on testing and achievement in public schools, linked directly to school funding. But in an in-person public PK program, that academic rigor is mitigated by the fact that the kids are also getting a lot of what they actually need, which is socio-emotional learning from being in a group setting with same-age kids, led by skilled ECE teachers who hopefully know how to guide them through the process of learning about the world, relating to one another, building vocabulary through ordinary interactions, engaging in free play, hands-on experiences, art, and music. Yes, the teacher might also drill the kids on letters and numbers even though there's no evidence that this actually helps with learning acquisition later. But they'll get all the other good stuff, and some kids actually take to the academic focus, so it winds up being okay in the end.

Online PK strips out all the best things about PK and leaves you just with the "academic rigor", the least important and probably unnecessary part! That's really bad!

Do not make your kid do anymore DL. Don't worry about learning numbers and letters right now. I mean it. Trust your instincts, as they are correct. It is upsetting that your child's school, school district, and teacher (all of whom know better) are subjecting your kid to this. They are doing it because they lack the will or creativity to do what should have been done last summer, and come up with an alternative option for young learners (whether that was in-person school, biweekly play dates, simply sending learning guides home with parents, literally anything other than planting 4 yr olds in front of computer screens for hours a day to "learn their letters" OMG that is the dumbest possible way to handle this).

You won't get in trouble, your child will be fine. Please stop making your kid do DL. Please.

+1000000

This is so well said. Couldn’t agree more.

[Anonymous]

Your PreK is absolutely outrageous!

Pull your kid out. Cook together. Play outside. Do art, do puzzles. Read to her for fun. Give her bubble baths and lego baths. Go for a hike. Take a deep breath and enjoy the time together.

(And in case it helps you, my oldest was so resistant to reading skills in prek and we stopped even trying. I don’t think he even knew all the letter sounds going into K. Now in 1st, he is reading well ahead of grade level and can’t put down a book.)

[Anonymous]

Have fun! Sing with her, rhyme with her, talk with her and snuggle up and read for pleasure. Have a variety of blocks and building materials available. Toss in a few old Leap Frog videos on rainy days.

[Anonymous]

I feel for you OP. This sounds like a terrible PreK experience. There are ways to help prepare your daughter for kindergarten without forcing her to sit and do worksheets. And she can learn to focus on activities . .it just doesn't have to be tedious worksheets.

For writing: Have her practice writing on anything but a piece of paper! My daughter loved window markers and we would practice words and letters on our patio doors. Same with numbers. I would put simple equations for her to solve and she would write it on the window. Markers work great on magnatiles. You can have her put letters on the tiles and then she can build words by putting the tiles together. Have her write letters in a white oil pastel and then paint with watercolors to "reveal" them.

Reading: Don't ruin the experience of reading for her. Make sure you reserve time for you to read to her without any expectation of her to "learn." She is learning a lot from just that! Write letters or simple CVC words on post-its and plaster them around the room. Call out a letter or word and have her run around to find it. Write out a bunch of "b" words and "d" words and give her bandaids to sticks over the "b" words.

Numbers: Get pony beads and have her make bracelets or necklaces in patterns. Or get beads with letters and have her make friendship bracelets with friends' names. I taught her how to count by 10 and 5 by writing the numbers on green paper lily pads and had her frog leap to the next number. I drew out 10 window frames and had her stamp 10 spiders in each frame to help practice counting to 100. Put a long piece of painter's tape on the floor and make a pattern on one side with magntatiles. Try and have her make a mirror image on the other side.

All of these things should only take 10-15 min at a time. Just enough to keep her attention (although she may get into it and want to do it for longer).

[Anonymous]

This makes me sad to read. We have some friends involved in a public pre-k and it’s so disheartening what they’re doing to these kids. These teachers are literally going through the motions. OP, I would pull my kid out of something like this, it’s so unnecessary.

[Anonymous]

Here is what worked for my kids:

"Do you want to take a rest in your room by yourself, or do you me to lay down in your bed with you and work on your letter sounds for a little bit first?"