I guess my question is - why not separate at this point? Sounds like you're unhappy, therapy has been ineffective, and you want to divorce at this point. If that's the case, separate now. And then, I think it's totally reasonable to ask that he not be there (in the room) at the birth, although I think it would be reasonable for him to be in the waiting room so he gets to meet the baby basically immediately after.
Overall, if you still have some hope you can save the marriage, asking him not to be in the delivery room would be hard to come back from. But if you're ready to be out, then get out. I don't see how that gets easier once the baby is here (especially if he's not helpful anyway).
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