There is no reason to be this obtuse. One can have family and parents and siblings and still need help. Not all parents are able to help. When I went through my divorce, my family was located oversees. It did me no good here with an abusive spouse and small kids and no money. Do you see how that works??????? |
| She needs to stop laying around on your couch and go find a job. It will be tough, but she has to show diligence to the courts. |
This probably just happened to the woman. Can she breathe for a minute? This is a traumatic event. First priority is to get the legal process going and get a temporary support order. |
+1, at this point the race has become a marathon not a sprint to finish, through new terrain and an unknown finish line. |
| Tell her to go home. It’s her house too (even if in his name). |
I didn’t mean to sound callous, just meant that he cannot kick her out without going through a legal process and she should make him do that. |
Maybe it is too disruptive for the kids...her being there. Maybe it will cause fights and drama that if she need something horrible--he can't tolerate being in the same room with her. If they value their kids (which at least one of them didn't or they wouldn't be in this current situation), they need to find a solution of stability and not have a 'War of the Roses' pissing m*tch about home rights. It is usual for the one that committed the offense to be the one to leave... |
NP here. You are making assumptions and you have no idea if anyone “did something” because the didn’t value the kids. And the wife does have a legal right not to be kicked out of the home or be separated from marital assets without due process. |
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Why isn’t the husband filing for divorce? He’s the one that kicked her out and drained the accounts.
Has he told your friend he is going to file? |
| I like the way your friend's ex rolls. He gets a lot of respect from me. Rather than play hard-ball with my immigrant ex I tried to be a nice guy. She played dirty in the divorce and stole a lot of money. |
Maybe getting his ducks in a row? |
| Is this the same woman where the husband changed the locks in the real estate forum? She had to have been doing some nasty stuff. |
Are the kids on your couch too or are they living with the husband? Is he working and watching them or are they older? Are they asking where she is? Does she go back to the house to visit them or do they get dropped off at your house? Those are all of the ?s I think of when I read the first post. I'm trying to think of a situation where a mother is thrown out of the house, cut off financially and separated from her kids...this is very serious. She definitely needs legal assistance pronto. |
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OP here. Not same as real estate forum. I won’t provide further details in case a mutual friend reads this.
I appreciate the idea of legal services. I passed it along to my friend and I hope she does what she needs to do. I am just being a supportive friend, but one also telling what she needs to do. I just hope she listens to me. Signing off. |
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I was curious about the legal amplifications of kicking a spouse out and there is precedent for kicking a spouse out of the home---legally under a 'kick out clause' or under 'divorce from bed and board'. Did OP's husband get legal enforcement to throw her out---or did she leave voluntarily? Would her presence be disruptive to the children?
An example would be accusing a spouse of constructively abandoning the marriage by leaving the marital bedroom and refusing to engage in intimacy when in fact you demanded the spouse leave the bedroom and repeatedly brought members of the opposite sex into the bedroom with you when your spouse was away from home. HOW TO OBTAIN A DWELLING EXCLUSION ORDER If you need to kick your spouse out of your residence for your family’s personal safety during a divorce or otherwise, hire a lawyer to submit an ex parte application to the courts. Since your spouse will not have the opportunity to present his or her side of the argument, the courts will typically only grant an application if it finds you are in a true emergency. Good causes for why the courts should grant your order may include: The other party has assaulted or threatened to assault you or someone under your care, custody, and control. Objective evidence points to serious risk of harm. You may have a video, texts, letters, or sworn witness statement that proves you, your child, or someone else in your care is in serious risk of harm from your spouse. You would suffer physical or emotional harm if the court did not grant the order. Under Family Code Section 6340, there is a lower standard of proof that means it’s not necessary to prove an emergency. In a non-emergency, however, you must prove that without the order there is a high risk of harm. You must also prove the party that will remain in the dwelling has a legal right to possession of the premises. If you meet these minimum requirements, the courts will grant your order, typically effective immediately. An attorney or third party will serve your spouse the order on your behalf to protect your personal safety. |