"How to talk so your children will listen" - reviews please!

[Anonymous]

The book is not worth getting. The principles of talking to your kids is simple:

Keep them well rested.
Pick your "battles"
Speak slowly and calmly when the time is right.
Remember, they are kids. Let them be kids.

[Anonymous]

I haven't read the book - never found child rearing books gave me much, and have watched them be misused by relatives... so ignore me if you wish.

Regarding raising your voice: it isn't volume one needs to worry about, but tone. If the kids are exuberant, raise the voice with a happy tone so they actually hear you. Use the happy tone to get them to look your way and calm down. Then you are fine.

[Anonymous]

I read this book while also taking some classes at PEP and it really helped me change my language AND thinking. Better house today, but I would say the classes were more effective in really drilling home what I needed.

[Anonymous]

I think "How to talk...", "Siblings Without Rivalry" and other Faber Mazlish books are great. Read Hiam Ginott's "Between Parent and Child," on which the Ferber Mazlish books are based. There are so many wonderful ideas in Ginott's book that I use every single day, and have since my children were infants. I've based much of my parenting on these books, and my children are so, so much better for it. I can't praise the books highly enough.

The reason we yell is because our children have learned to ignore us until we raise our voices. The way to stop yelling is to make immediate consequences if your child does not respond the first time. Walk into the room and turn off the TV if your child doesn't do it the first time you ask. Wash his hands if he doesn't do it when you ask, put on his coat, shoes, etc., if he doesn't do it the first time you ask. It's so much easier to yell, but that compounds the problem.