Difficult choices to send whom to private

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is op. Grandparents are elderly, and they do not drive or speak English. They often have TV turned on, and they don’t engage much with the younger one because the younger one is energized. And, they stay home most of the time. Good things about grandparents care are they cook a lot of yummy food for younger one to eat, and they cuddle a lot and so laid back.

Grandparents cannot take the older one to do DL because the older one is too handful (chatterbox, extrovert & energized) and they cannot communicate with each other because of language barrier.

For 2021-2022, I really want to send the younger one to private daycare in person because that was the original plan. But, I am not sure if I can handle DL with my older kid for a full year, and I can imagine me yelling all the time. For older kid, if I decide to go private for 2021-2022, I have 2 options. One is to keep him at current daycare with certified k program in person (I may pick this option since both kids can be picked up/dropped off together, and I know that they will be opened in person) OR find a new private school with k in person (need to do research on this one). We will hope for public school to be opened in person in 2022-2023.

Older kid daycare is currently opened in limited capacity but it is 100% full. We need to lock spots if I decide to go private for 1 or both kids when priority enrollment window is opened at late December for us. We are thinking 2 months ahead, not a full year ahead for 2021-2022.

[Anonymous]

Can you hire one person for the cost of private to get both kids stimulation and individual engagement. exposure to reading aloud, trips to local parks? No private school for either and consider homeschool or public for K child. Of course, would need to do a good job of choosing childcare person who was careful about exposure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is op. Grandparents are elderly, and they do not drive or speak English. They often have TV turned on, and they don’t engage much with the younger one because the younger one is energized. And, they stay home most of the time. Good things about grandparents care are they cook a lot of yummy food for younger one to eat, and they cuddle a lot and so laid back.

Grandparents cannot take the older one to do DL because the older one is too handful (chatterbox, extrovert & energized) and they cannot communicate with each other because of language barrier.

For 2021-2022, I really want to send the younger one to private daycare in person because that was the original plan. But, I am not sure if I can handle DL with my older kid for a full year, and I can imagine me yelling all the time. For older kid, if I decide to go private for 2021-2022, I have 2 options. One is to keep him at current daycare with certified k program in person (I may pick this option since both kids can be picked up/dropped off together, and I know that they will be opened in person) OR find a new private school with k in person (need to do research on this one). We will hope for public school to be opened in person in 2022-2023.

Junk food, cuddles, and minimal engagement will be a disaster for a 2 5yr old.

Grandma is good as a backup babysitter, not as fulltime childcare provider. You're doing a real disservice to everyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is op. Grandparents are elderly, and they do not drive or speak English. They often have TV turned on, and they don’t engage much with the younger one because the younger one is energized. And, they stay home most of the time. Good things about grandparents care are they cook a lot of yummy food for younger one to eat, and they cuddle a lot and so laid back.

Grandparents cannot take the older one to do DL because the older one is too handful (chatterbox, extrovert & energized) and they cannot communicate with each other because of language barrier.

For 2021-2022, I really want to send the younger one to private daycare in person because that was the original plan. But, I am not sure if I can handle DL with my older kid for a full year, and I can imagine me yelling all the time. For older kid, if I decide to go private for 2021-2022, I have 2 options. One is to keep him at current daycare with certified k program in person (I may pick this option since both kids can be picked up/dropped off together, and I know that they will be opened in person) OR find a new private school with k in person (need to do research on this one). We will hope for public school to be opened in person in 2022-2023.

Junk food, cuddles, and minimal engagement will be a disaster for a 2 5yr old.

Grandma is good as a backup babysitter, not as fulltime childcare provider. You're doing a real disservice to everyone.

Where does it say junk food? Cooking yummy food does not mean cooking junk food.

[Anonymous]

Wait, grandparents can provide language immersion? Isn’t that worth a lot, in addition to all the cuddles? Sounds delightful!

[Anonymous]

Op, are you even remotely considering your parents’ health? Hopefully we will have a vaccine by then and things will be much better. But if not, and you have one kid going in person to kindergarten or daycare, your parents should not be caring for the other kid. That’s a covid risk for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Keep the 2.5 half year old home with grandparents and send the K to private in-person school. Next year will NOT be normal. At best, it may be hybrid. Virtual learning for K is terrible.

So you want grandma to be exposed to the kindergartners classmates Covid exposures? If it It’s not safe for the public schools to be open, but it’s not safe for grandma to take care of sibling of the kid who’s going to school in person.

[Anonymous]

I would send older one to private if public school is not in person. 2.5 can stay with grandparents.

[Anonymous]

I would pick option 3 - get a really good nanny and have them handle the distance learning while you work. Should be less than 2 private school tuitions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wait, grandparents can provide language immersion? Isn’t that worth a lot, in addition to all the cuddles? Sounds delightful!

This!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait, grandparents can provide language immersion? Isn’t that worth a lot, in addition to all the cuddles? Sounds delightful!

This!

But there are too many trade-offs and cons. The grandparents are elderly, OP admits they don't engage, the TV is on the whole time, and the list goes on. The 2.5yr old will be wound-up and full of energy. OP will post back on DCUM that she can't figure out why her kid is a mess, won't nap, and isn't tired at bedtime (um b/c the kid is forced to sit around elderly grandparents' house all day long).
The grandparents scolding him (b/c he's climbing up the walls) in native tongue and smothering him with hugs when all he wants to do is run around outside or go to the local play ground and otherwise burn off typical 2.5 yr old energy .

I mean if you want your kid to learn your native language then start speaking to him yourself, no?

[Anonymous]

Option 1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Keep the 2.5 half year old home with grandparents and send the K to private in-person school. Next year will NOT be normal. At best, it may be hybrid. Virtual learning for K is terrible.

I can second this. A 2.5-year old doesn't need to go to daycare, assuming you have other reliable childcare for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is op. Grandparents are elderly, and they do not drive or speak English. They often have TV turned on, and they don’t engage much with the younger one because the younger one is energized. And, they stay home most of the time. Good things about grandparents care are they cook a lot of yummy food for younger one to eat, and they cuddle a lot and so laid back.

Grandparents cannot take the older one to do DL because the older one is too handful (chatterbox, extrovert & energized) and they cannot communicate with each other because of language barrier.

For 2021-2022, I really want to send the younger one to private daycare in person because that was the original plan. But, I am not sure if I can handle DL with my older kid for a full year, and I can imagine me yelling all the time. For older kid, if I decide to go private for 2021-2022, I have 2 options. One is to keep him at current daycare with certified k program in person (I may pick this option since both kids can be picked up/dropped off together, and I know that they will be opened in person) OR find a new private school with k in person (need to do research on this one). We will hope for public school to be opened in person in 2022-2023.

I would choose this option in a heartbeat. Why bother trying to find a new private for K? Just keep him where he's at and don't drop your two kids off at two different locations. Simplify, simplify, simplify.

Also, I voted for Option 1 before I read the above - in that case I'd probably send them both.

[Anonymous]

Option 4. Get a nanny
Or option 5. Go with a less expensive preschool/daycare. At 2.5 it doesn’t need to be the best.