My MIL is upset with me—smooth it over or ignore?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't understand why your DH told you about this. I swear most of the problem with in-laws is from husbands communicating to their wives that their parents (usually the mom) is upset about something trivial and communicating to their parents (usually the mom) that the wife is upset about something trivial. Your DH should learn to say, on the spot, that there is nothing wrong with you scheduling time with your parents because he wasn't available and he wants to be there to see his parents too, what day next week works? And then say nothing to you.

So true and comes down to lacking the emotional intelligence/willingness to do emotional labor to evaluate what he should do about it, so passing it off to his wife.

No he was telling his mother so she knew that any day was fine but that day. It shouldn't have been a drama.

[Anonymous]

Ignore, ignore, ignore! Set your boundaries and let it go! Sounds like she is jealous of your Mom.

[Anonymous]

Ignore it. If she brings it up to him, he handles. If she brings it up to you, you direct her to him.

[Anonymous]

Your MIL is a real piece of "has no boundaries." What are you supposed to smoother things for? That she is jealous that your parents saw your kids one night and not her? Even though she sees the grandkids all the time? That she acts like a 6 year old whose frenemy did something with you but she did not? For one night? I know you put in some convoluted story there about bringing the food over, and this night and that night, but that is way too asinine to even fully read or comprehend. Your MIL is jealous that your kids have another set of grandparents and she wants to be the queen bee in their and your lives. She is upset you and the kids had an evening with your parents. That's it, nothing else is needed here. And that is crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your MIL is a real piece of "has no boundaries." What are you supposed to smoother things for? That she is jealous that your parents saw your kids one night and not her? Even though she sees the grandkids all the time? That she acts like a 6 year old whose frenemy did something with you but she did not? For one night? I know you put in some convoluted story there about bringing the food over, and this night and that night, but that is way too asinine to even fully read or comprehend. Your MIL is jealous that your kids have another set of grandparents and she wants to be the queen bee in their and your lives. She is upset you and the kids had an evening with your parents. That's it, nothing else is needed here. And that is crazy.

^^^this right here☝🏾

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your MIL is a real piece of "has no boundaries." What are you supposed to smoother things for? That she is jealous that your parents saw your kids one night and not her? Even though she sees the grandkids all the time? That she acts like a 6 year old whose frenemy did something with you but she did not? For one night? I know you put in some convoluted story there about bringing the food over, and this night and that night, but that is way too asinine to even fully read or comprehend. Your MIL is jealous that your kids have another set of grandparents and she wants to be the queen bee in their and your lives. She is upset you and the kids had an evening with your parents. That's it, nothing else is needed here. And that is crazy.

+1

[Anonymous]

Ignore, ignore, ignore, just like you would any 6-year-old's temper tantrum. She didn't say it to you, so ignore or you will be opening the dragon's mouth.