Nanny family has stopped social dostancing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Personally I would quit. I intend to continue strict social distancing for my sake as well as my charge. If my employers weren’t I would absolutely quit.

Covid 19 can be mild but it can be agonizingly painful with a long recovery for young people as well.

Op here- I just feel like it’s really disrespectful. They don’t care about my health and keeping me safe, but they expect me to stay home and pay extra for groceries to be delivered to keep them safe? I was happy to stay home until 2021, but if they can’t give me the same courtesy I’m really done. I don’t understand these parents. I need my job so I’ll be quiet about my lack of social distancing, but hope other employers see this as a cautionary tale.

Quit and find a family that values you.

[Anonymous]

We have a written agreement with our nanny that we update with each phase of reopening. And it's an agreement where both of our households agree to live by the same rules.

I can't imagine disrespecting my nanny like this and not living by the same expectations I'm asking of her. This has to be mutual - and even better in writing.

I'm sorry OP. Can you ask for a written agreement when the next phase starts?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Personally I would quit. I intend to continue strict social distancing for my sake as well as my charge. If my employers weren’t I would absolutely quit.

Covid 19 can be mild but it can be agonizingly painful with a long recovery for young people as well.

Op here- I just feel like it’s really disrespectful. They don’t care about my health and keeping me safe, but they expect me to stay home and pay extra for groceries to be delivered to keep them safe? I was happy to stay home until 2021, but if they can’t give me the same courtesy I’m really done. I don’t understand these parents. I need my job so I’ll be quiet about my lack of social distancing, but hope other employers see this as a cautionary tale.

You need a job, OP, not this job. Start looking for a new position with people who respect you. You won’t have any trouble finding a new job now.

+1. Where do you live OP? Literally every day there are posts on our listserv asking for nannies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Personally I would quit. I intend to continue strict social distancing for my sake as well as my charge. If my employers weren’t I would absolutely quit.

Covid 19 can be mild but it can be agonizingly painful with a long recovery for young people as well.

Op here- I just feel like it’s really disrespectful. They don’t care about my health and keeping me safe, but they expect me to stay home and pay extra for groceries to be delivered to keep them safe? I was happy to stay home until 2021, but if they can’t give me the same courtesy I’m really done. I don’t understand these parents. I need my job so I’ll be quiet about my lack of social distancing, but hope other employers see this as a cautionary tale.

They think less of you and don’t think you as smart enough to do sd safely.

[Anonymous]

This almost seems like a troll post. I can't imagine a family being so obtuse as to go out and about yet be upset about you going grocery shopping???

I'm a nanny myself by the way. I work for multiple families as an independent contractor providing private care and let them know that while I don't go to restaurants/salons/meet friends, I do go see my sisters and help out with child care 1-2x a week. I am up front about this and it's each family's choice as to hire me or not. I understand the risks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This almost seems like a troll post. I can't imagine a family being so obtuse as to go out and about yet be upset about you going grocery shopping???

I'm a nanny myself by the way. I work for multiple families as an independent contractor providing private care and let them know that while I don't go to restaurants/salons/meet friends, I do go see my sisters and help out with child care 1-2x a week. I am up front about this and it's each family's choice as to hire me or not. I understand the risks.

I don’t know, maybe but I know a family who is looking for a nanny and they have some weird expectations. I think the dad is still working from home right now but not forever and the mom is a teacher. Oldest is in ES. Their youngest previously attended daycare but has had some respiratory issues so they’re planning to keep him out until a vaccine is available. They are looking for nanny to start when the new school year begins, and want a nanny who has been and is willing to continue a “super-right lockdown” like they are. Except they fully acknowledge that dad will be back at the office and mom/older DC may be at schools in person if F2F learning resumes. They see nothing wrong with this request.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This almost seems like a troll post. I can't imagine a family being so obtuse as to go out and about yet be upset about you going grocery shopping???

I'm a nanny myself by the way. I work for multiple families as an independent contractor providing private care and let them know that while I don't go to restaurants/salons/meet friends, I do go see my sisters and help out with child care 1-2x a week. I am up front about this and it's each family's choice as to hire me or not. I understand the risks.

I don’t know, maybe but I know a family who is looking for a nanny and they have some weird expectations. I think the dad is still working from home right now but not forever and the mom is a teacher. Oldest is in ES. Their youngest previously attended daycare but has had some respiratory issues so they’re planning to keep him out until a vaccine is available. They are looking for nanny to start when the new school year begins, and want a nanny who has been and is willing to continue a “super-right lockdown” like they are. Except they fully acknowledge that dad will be back at the office and mom/older DC may be at schools in person if F2F learning resumes. They see nothing wrong with this request.

They need an au pair, because to demand strict social distancing from a nanny when you cannot do it yourselves is kind of F-ed up. And do they not realize the kid will be exposed to all of the germs they bring home anyway?

[Anonymous]

As things open up near us, we're doing more - outdoor playdates, curbside shopping, etc. Our nanny is doing the same and it's not my business what she does on her off time. We never discussed it specifically but we communicate regularly and I trust her judgment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This almost seems like a troll post. I can't imagine a family being so obtuse as to go out and about yet be upset about you going grocery shopping???

I'm a nanny myself by the way. I work for multiple families as an independent contractor providing private care and let them know that while I don't go to restaurants/salons/meet friends, I do go see my sisters and help out with child care 1-2x a week. I am up front about this and it's each family's choice as to hire me or not. I understand the risks.

I don’t know, maybe but I know a family who is looking for a nanny and they have some weird expectations. I think the dad is still working from home right now but not forever and the mom is a teacher. Oldest is in ES. Their youngest previously attended daycare but has had some respiratory issues so they’re planning to keep him out until a vaccine is available. They are looking for nanny to start when the new school year begins, and want a nanny who has been and is willing to continue a “super-right lockdown” like they are. Except they fully acknowledge that dad will be back at the office and mom/older DC may be at schools in person if F2F learning resumes. They see nothing wrong with this request.

They need an au pair, because to demand strict social distancing from a nanny when you cannot do it yourselves is kind of F-ed up. And do they not realize the kid will be exposed to all of the germs they bring home anyway?

Ha! An au pair would rematch in a heartbeat if asked to dis tan earlier more than the family, especially with the ban on new APs for (at least) 6 months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Personally I would quit. I intend to continue strict social distancing for my sake as well as my charge. If my employers weren’t I would absolutely quit.

Covid 19 can be mild but it can be agonizingly painful with a long recovery for young people as well.

Op here- I just feel like it’s really disrespectful. They don’t care about my health and keeping me safe, but they expect me to stay home and pay extra for groceries to be delivered to keep them safe? I was happy to stay home until 2021, but if they can’t give me the same courtesy I’m really done. I don’t understand these parents. I need my job so I’ll be quiet about my lack of social distancing, but hope other employers see this as a cautionary tale.

1. Do you have an "act of God/force majeure" clause in your contract with the nanny/other family? If so, you might be able to use it to get out of the share with them (I think the law is pretty unsettled on whether a pandemic counts as an act of God, but are they really going to pony up lawyer bucks to take you to court? No.).
2. Does the nanny know what the other family is up to? If not, tell him/her. They might also find it irresponsible and break the contract themselves, in which case, you ask the nanny to stay on with your family and find someone new to join your share.
3. Is the other family open to adding an addendum to the agreement that updates conditions/expectations regarding the pandemic and health guidelines? I doubt they'll want to constrain themselves so much, based on what you've described, but worth the ask--especially if the nanny also feels uneasy about their behavior.

[Anonymous]

OP, we're looking for a nanny with good social distancing/covid safety and will promise to also be socially distant/safe, too! Please reach out if you want a change let me know and we'll find a way to get in touch!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Personally I would quit. I intend to continue strict social distancing for my sake as well as my charge. If my employers weren’t I would absolutely quit.

Covid 19 can be mild but it can be agonizingly painful with a long recovery for young people as well.

Op here- I just feel like it’s really disrespectful. They don’t care about my health and keeping me safe, but they expect me to stay home and pay extra for groceries to be delivered to keep them safe? I was happy to stay home until 2021, but if they can’t give me the same courtesy I’m really done. I don’t understand these parents. I need my job so I’ll be quiet about my lack of social distancing, but hope other employers see this as a cautionary tale.

I would look around for another position, while quietly living your life. I'm sure some family out there who is social distancing still might want a socially distanced nanny, maybe even at a higher salary.

[Anonymous]

Find a new job. Nannies willing to socially distance are in high demand.

[Anonymous]

I think there is a difference between having some outside playdates and a nanny going out to bars with her 20-something friends. That age group is on the rise in terms of cases. So, I guess it depends on what exactly is going on, on both sides.

[Anonymous]

The world has stopped social distancing. That's why everything is back open. soccer started, basketball has started, retail stores are open, restaurants are open for sit downs.