S/o - what should caring white people do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t tolerate hate. Don’t just speak up when you friends say something racist, and then still be their friend when they learn not to say those things in front of you. Alienate them. In the workplace, don’t promote racists, don’t hire racists, and don’t give racists another chance. Let people know when a racist loses a job that it was because they’re racist. In school, don’t tolerate racists or people who did racist things and don’t give them second chances.

Is that too hard? Does that seem too extreme and make you too uncomfortable? My guess is yes, and that’s why racism and hate is still thriving.

Out of curiosity, does this go for Latinos, Asians and other people who say racists things in the workplace? Because I have heard Pakistanis at my workplace say the N word and Latinos refer to an Asian colleague as a c***k. Should I out them?

Asking out of curiosity because thinking white people are the only people who are overtly racist toward blacks in the workplace is foolish narcissism and again making it all about yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t tolerate hate. Don’t just speak up when you friends say something racist, and then still be their friend when they learn not to say those things in front of you. Alienate them. In the workplace, don’t promote racists, don’t hire racists, and don’t give racists another chance. Let people know when a racist loses a job that it was because they’re racist. In school, don’t tolerate racists or people who did racist things and don’t give them second chances.

Is that too hard? Does that seem too extreme and make you too uncomfortable? My guess is yes, and that’s why racism and hate is still thriving.

Nobody would dare say racist things in front of me.

We hear it all the time, but its never a white person. It's almost always one POC talking about another POC of a different race. Corporate america has white people too scared to say anything in the workplace. At the same time sexual harassment training tends to be hilarious because POC blame the victims in the scenarios.

As an Asian person I see a blatant double standard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Suppose she has already done this. Suppose she has already read the literature, the studies. Supposed she owns the implicit bias in herself. And now she wants to do something active. Something to make things better. Besides vote, is there nothing she can do besides sit and feel good that she has educated herself?

Find the non profits that work to help address systemic racism and it’s effects. Volunteer there.

Make racism the point of your calls/emails/letters to representatives. Make it clear you think systemic inequalities are a root cause of trouble in our society and you want work done on it. Support the opinions of the non-profits you now volunteer for and donate to.

Maybe not right now, but make it a point to attend rallies and protests for causes near to the black experience as necessary. View yourself as an assistant to rather than a part of. Like those white protestors in St Louis (I think?) who formed a human shield between the police and the black protestors.

Address this stuff with your kids, friends and parents. Especially your kids. It’s been weird having these conversations with my white kids about police brutality and authoritarianism, but it wouldn’t be fair that their black friends have to live with the reality-based fear of police and my little white sons don’t ever have to wonder if the officer is in their corner.

[Anonymous]

White people love to make this about themselves. I’m a different minority, and I’ve never seen a single white person stand up to the nasty things white and minorities, including blacks, have said in the workplace about my group. White people just love to parade again about how enlightened they are, I really believe you white so-called liberals are embedding power with your white privilege obsession.

[Anonymous]

Apparently we are all still racist 150 years after slavery, and 60 years after Jim Crow. There probably isn't a good solution. People mostly like to be around folks like themselves, and that's been true for all of human history.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Apparently we are all still racist 150 years after slavery, and 60 years after Jim Crow. There probably isn't a good solution. People mostly like to be around folks like themselves, and that's been true for all of human history.

Actually there’s been a ton of progress. Two steps forward, one step back kind of progress. It’s possible to do and be better, you just have to want to do the work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Apparently we are all still racist 150 years after slavery, and 60 years after Jim Crow. There probably isn't a good solution. People mostly like to be around folks like themselves, and that's been true for all of human history.

Actually there’s been a ton of progress. Two steps forward, one step back kind of progress. It’s possible to do and be better, you just have to want to do the work.

+1
And a lot of people either don’t think there’s a problem (Trump voters, for example) or don’t want to put in the work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Suppose she has already done this. Suppose she has already read the literature, the studies. Supposed she owns the implicit bias in herself. And now she wants to do something active. Something to make things better. Besides vote, is there nothing she can do besides sit and feel good that she has educated herself?

Find the non profits that work to help address systemic racism and it’s effects. Volunteer there.

Make racism the point of your calls/emails/letters to representatives. Make it clear you think systemic inequalities are a root cause of trouble in our society and you want work done on it. Support the opinions of the non-profits you now volunteer for and donate to.

Maybe not right now, but make it a point to attend rallies and protests for causes near to the black experience as necessary. View yourself as an assistant to rather than a part of. Like those white protestors in St Louis (I think?) who formed a human shield between the police and the black protestors.

Address this stuff with your kids, friends and parents. Especially your kids. It’s been weird having these conversations with my white kids about police brutality and authoritarianism, but it wouldn’t be fair that their black friends have to live with the reality-based fear of police and my little white sons don’t ever have to wonder if the officer is in their corner.

Ask the hard questions at your PTA meetings or any other places you regularly work with others in your community. Learn about how black history is addressed in your school’s curriculum outside of February.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Apparently we are all still racist 150 years after slavery, and 60 years after Jim Crow. There probably isn't a good solution. People mostly like to be around folks like themselves, and that's been true for all of human history.

Actually there’s been a ton of progress. Two steps forward, one step back kind of progress. It’s possible to do and be better, you just have to want to do the work.

+1
And a lot of people either don’t think there’s a problem (Trump voters, for example) or don’t want to put in the work.

White people fighting racism is like fighting against your own interests. When push come to shove, when it gets uncomfortable or you actually have to give up something instead of just tweeting or liking a comment on FB or reading a book to pass the time people are bound to shrug their shoulders. That’s why were at this point with protests nationwide. It’s not just Trump voters (half of America) as we saw with Sarah Cooper and yes, they don’t want to put in the real work as you said because that work is hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:White people love to make this about themselves. I’m a different minority, and I’ve never seen a single white person stand up to the nasty things white and minorities, including blacks, have said in the workplace about my group. White people just love to parade again about how enlightened they are, I really believe you white so-called liberals are embedding power with your white privilege obsession.

This is probably the most incisive, thoughtful post I’ve ever read on here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t tolerate hate. Don’t just speak up when you friends say something racist, and then still be their friend when they learn not to say those things in front of you. Alienate them. In the workplace, don’t promote racists, don’t hire racists, and don’t give racists another chance. Let people know when a racist loses a job that it was because they’re racist. In school, don’t tolerate racists or people who did racist things and don’t give them second chances.

Is that too hard? Does that seem too extreme and make you too uncomfortable? My guess is yes, and that’s why racism and hate is still thriving.

Out of curiosity, does this go for Latinos, Asians and other people who say racists things in the workplace? Because I have heard Pakistanis at my workplace say the N word and Latinos refer to an Asian colleague as a c***k. Should I out them?

Asking out of curiosity because thinking white people are the only people who are overtly racist toward blacks in the workplace is foolish narcissism and again making it all about yourself.

Lol at other races not being able to be racists. You bend over backwards to try and nuance some literal interpretation of a word when you lose sight of reality.

An Indian/Latino that displays similar racist behavior as some white do is a racist. Besides, you’re conflating race with ethnicity.

[Anonymous]

As a white hispanic, I will continue to put HOPE signs on my front lawn and pray that everyone finds peace. I’ll then crack open and toast some Pinot Grigio while having a social distancing soirée on my driveway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Suppose she has already done this. Suppose she has already read the literature, the studies. Supposed she owns the implicit bias in herself. And now she wants to do something active. Something to make things better. Besides vote, is there nothing she can do besides sit and feel good that she has educated herself?

Find the non profits that work to help address systemic racism and it’s effects. Volunteer there.

Make racism the point of your calls/emails/letters to representatives. Make it clear you think systemic inequalities are a root cause of trouble in our society and you want work done on it. Support the opinions of the non-profits you now volunteer for and donate to.

Maybe not right now, but make it a point to attend rallies and protests for causes near to the black experience as necessary. View yourself as an assistant to rather than a part of. Like those white protestors in St Louis (I think?) who formed a human shield between the police and the black protestors.

Address this stuff with your kids, friends and parents. Especially your kids. It’s been weird having these conversations with my white kids about police brutality and authoritarianism, but it wouldn’t be fair that their black friends have to live with the reality-based fear of police and my little white sons don’t ever have to wonder if the officer is in their corner.

I used to give to the Southern Poverty Law Center, until it was revealed to be a scam. You are right: I need to find a legitimate replacement for that charity in my giving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The first step is to understand that acknowledging white privilege does NOT mean that a white person or their family hasn't had to work in life, like our Irish poster. Let's clear this up:

Larla is white and has had to work hard to get an education, or a job, or pay bills, whatever. Larla thinks that they don't have white privilege because their idea of white privilege is simplistic - they choose to believe that white privilege only refers to white people who are born rich. Larla doesn't notice that she and her family go about their day without extra scrutiny. She taught her children that police officers are always helpers. Their teen daughter got her first job at a cute little boutique and then got a speeding ticket on her way to work but the judge reduced the fine to the minimum - she's glad that the judge noticed that Larlita comes from a good family. Larla is working hard at two jobs and wants her children to have good lives.

Larlo is black and grew up one town away from Larla. He remembers when he was five years old and was carrying a toy around a Walmart while his mom shopped - his mom got really upset when the lady kept showing up in the same aisle as them. She took the toy away and opened a bag of Goldfish for him to munch on instead, but then that older guy commented that he hopes they intend to pay for that bag. Larlo had to go to ten different stores and fast food places before he finally landed his first job. He's got a good job now but is often given the accounts in the nearby city, not the suburb he lives in. His oldest son was recently pulled over by a police officer for a tail light that burned out - he knew what to do because his dad had given him 'the talk.' He kept his hands on the steering wheel the entire time and was polite but was really upset by the extended conversation that seemed to center on a liquor store robbery - Is he sure he didn't come from that area? There's no alcohol in his car? No guns? No drugs? Where was he coming from again? And his boss would verify that he was at work the whole time? Larlo works hard to give his family a good life and is proud of his son's scholarship.

This is white privilege. It doesn't negate hard work by either party. It doesn't mean that white people have everything handed to them or that all white people are living comfortable lives. It just means that there are many little ways that the daily lives of a white person are smoother than the daily lives of a black person.

Not saying these things don't happen, but this is an assumption. For example: I am a white woman. I have received a few tickets in my time--including one for a uturn when I was eight months pregnant and the sign had just been placed there after people had been doing uturns there for years. I was not given a "bye." I have never been given a bye on traffic tickets, although I am a careful driver and have only been given a few. I have a grown white son who received a couple of tickets when he was still at home. He is a polite young man--but, no bye.

As for the goldfish in the store. No one should open a bag in the store--black or white. I don't say anything to others that do that--but, I always wonder if they intend to pay.

I agree that black people do get targeted and that is a crying shame. I also agree with a PP who mentioned that he/she hears more racial slurs from minorities than from whites.
Rioting does not help. But, I'm seeing more white kids out there than black. But, no one should make excuses for this.

When this behavior is excused, it is not going to make things better. All who are throwing things and being destructive should be arrested. Not encouraged. Can't help but think that this "give the people space to be angry" is not helpful.

And, it certainly is not going to change the attitude of anyone who is racist. It is going to make it worse.

[Anonymous]

Elect a non-racist president, it starts at the top.