What do you do when you can’t trust your spouse with your kids (safety)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:you stay until the little one is around 10 year old.

Nope. 5 is plenty. They’re not going to starve or need serious supervision at that age. Especially with an older sibling. Make sure they have a phone and can call you.

[Anonymous]

Different cause (DH is on the spectrum) but I never leave the kids with him. He’s too easily distracted.

[Anonymous]

The kids will get older so some hazards will not be as important (like stairs). By then you may resent him less because you can breath again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Document his drinking and talk to a lawyer. You may be able to get 100% custody, or at the very least he'll be required to have supervised custody.

It’s hard to document - he adamantly says he wasn’t drinking and the charges are just like general 7-11 charge. I’d guess it’s once every 2 weeks he has 3-4 drinks which doesn’t sound like much but for with the mental health meds he’s on (including a benzo) it puts him in like a manic mode and he just has no judgement with the kids (or himself, he’s hurt himself also). He tries really hard to hide it so every time he’s even happy / perky I suspect he’s been drinking. But I’m not sure how or what I could prove to a judge

You don't always need hard evidence. This isn't a conviction, you just need enough to show a judge he's unfit to parent.

Get a notebook you can hide and write it all down.

Your statement, written or not will not be enough to deny custody or visitation to their other parent.

Exactly. This is all well and good for people to be writing, but the truth is that she is in a situation that is not black and white. If she leaves the dad May very well get unsupervised time.

Maybe. Either way, it’s a smart idea to see a lawyer and document everything. I did, and it benefitted me.