Worried about kids' adjustment back to normal times

[Anonymous]

It’s not really different than when you are on maternity leave with an older sibling at home. Actually, the period will be much shorter.

[Anonymous]

As my uncle says, “don’t trouble trouble until trouble troubles you”.

Like your kids, I’m living my best life right now. I’m a huge introvert and love working from home full time. I am a lawyer and normally have lots of conflict in my professional life and it’s so nice to be able to deal with that on the phone instead of in person. The transition back to the office will probably be jarring but for now, I’m enjoying my life at home and not worrying about what may come later. Kids are resilient, so I’d be glad that they are happy now and deal with the transition when it comes.

My kids (5 and 2) are extroverts but have adapted pretty well to the new normal. I think it’s a survival skill—as long as they are safe and loved, many are fine in whatever situation they find themselves. If yours fall into that category, maybe you can take it as a sign that the transition back will be relatively fine too.
Best of luck as we all navigate this!

[Anonymous]

I'm also worried about this. My 3YO has always struggled with some sort of anxiety (noises, crowds, other kids, etc) and was JUST starting to actually enjoy friends, play places, "school", etc. He's been taken care of his whole life by either a nanny or my MIL so he's never been to preschool or daycare. In January, my MIL had started taking him to preschool (a parent/tot class twice a week at our rec center) and he was finally starting to enjoy it and explore on his own away from her and then this all happened.

To top it off, we're moving at the end of April and getting a new nanny starting this summer. I had high hopes and signed my 3YO up for part time preschool starting in the fall so as soon as this is all over I feel like it will be hard to make-up for lost time with his socialization and anxiety. I was also hoping to sign him up for some summer camps but I'm pretty sure that's a lost cause now.

My 5YO was in half day preschool and it was a really easy "out" transition for him. He doesn't miss his friends which is surprising to me and I'm also worried he's not going to want to do summer camps (if it's even going to be a possibility anyway) or to start K in the fall!

[Anonymous]

My kid would be thrilled to go back to normal and be able to go play on the playground, go to preschool and play with her friends. she has already made elaborate plans for her birthday which is in June and I am praying that we are going to be able to celebrate her birthday with friends.

[Anonymous]

There will be an adjustment but no good comes from worrying about it now. Its not like you're going to not spend time with your kids now so they won't be disappointed when you go back to work.

[Anonymous]

I think it will be a rough adjustment back. My 2 year old loves not going to playschool in the morning and loves that dh and i are home all day (working but still home) so he doesn't have to worry about where i am and when i'm coming back.

the baby was clingy to start with but being with only 3 adults for so long and only in an extremely familiar setting is going to make it even worse

[Anonymous]

My middle schooler is loving not having to get up at 6 am every weekday. Actually, come to think of it, so am I. That part will be a rough transition when school starts back up. We are all looking forward to seeing friends and grandparents again, though.

[Anonymous]

It's okay for kids to learn that sometimes life is not normal, that sometimes you have to change it up and do what you need to do to get by. Life will probably not completely return to the "normal" we knew. Life has bumps in the road, and this is one of them. My kids know exactly what's going on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. I worry about how this is affecting my 3 year old right now, and the accumulated trauma if it goes on for months. Yesterday he had a meltdown because he wants to go to the park, go ice skating, go to gymnastics, go to school, go ANYWHERE. He's become more prone to outbursts, hitting, and defiance. At the same time, he's clingy in was he wasn't before.

None of us are living our best lives right now. Maybe the transition back to normal will be rough for a week or two, but normal is better than this. This is HARD. This is miserable.

This is not “trauma” for a three year old. A three year old needs her parents and a loving and stable home. He can go to a park, climb trees, play ball with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's okay for kids to learn that sometimes life is not normal, that sometimes you have to change it up and do what you need to do to get by. Life will probably not completely return to the "normal" we knew. Life has bumps in the road, and this is one of them. My kids know exactly what's going on.

+ 1.

[Anonymous]

I'm worried my 3 yr old won't ever change out of pajamas again. Or wear underwear.

[Anonymous]

Don’t borrow trouble. Kids are resilient and will be just fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. And I’d be worried about my 6 year old if they felt that way TBH. People are social. They get cabin fever. This isn’t little house on the prairie times. When this is over, get her in some more structured social activities

Worst advice ever. Kids can be social with their parents and siblings. They are not chipped liver. OP’s 6yo sounds a lot better than most DCUMers 6yos who get carted from structured activity to structured activity and on screens the rest of the time so they barely know their own families.

[Anonymous]

I think you have quite a long time before you need to worry about this.

[Anonymous]

OP, yes, I think it will be like starting "school" all over again for my 5 y.o. complete with crying at drop off etc. My 1 year old is already getting hysterical when I leave the room since we are spending so much time together (including on my work conference calls... :/)

We are like you - I travel for work about 2-3 weeks per quarter and DH works outside the home with less travel. I'm dreading the return to that pace for the kids, but also, I am really loving the 100% remote work. I may have to look for another job that allows it...