Fiance past behavior . Did she cheat?

[Anonymous]

You don’t trust the woman you’re going to marry. You think she is capable of lying to you and violating your trust.Not sure if that’s more about you, or her. But it’s the biggest issue in your relationship and you both should be concerned..

[Anonymous]

I think you trust your gut here .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your gut feeling is all that counts. Whether she is actually cheating or not does not even matter.

+1 You're not even married yet. If you don't have this level of trust now, you're not going to last and it's a million times easier to end an engagement than a marriage.

[Anonymous]

How did you find out any of this? If you are taking the word of a Starbucks barista over your fiancée, it sounds like you are already suspicious. That is a bad sign.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Last year my now fiance, then girlfriend complained about a coworker that she hated. She hated the co-worker because according to my fiance the girl liked a male co-worker and was jealous of their friendship.
My fiance swore at the time they were just friends, the girl was crazy, and the guy was not at all what she was interested in. My fiance is just a super friendly and outgoing person.
I believed her because the girl did some weird stuff.
Recently it was brought to my attention that my fiance may not have been totally innocent in this. Example leaving messages on his Facebook and going to lunch together daily, Starbucks cashier thought they were dating.
I know it sounds stupid. She doesn't see any of these people anymore.
I just have this weird gut feeling.

You sound like you have been stalking or investigating. How do you know what the barista thought?

BTW, people don’t have sex at Starbucks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You don’t trust the woman you’re going to marry. You think she is capable of lying to you and violating your trust.Not sure if that’s more about you, or her. But it’s the biggest issue in your relationship and you both should be concerned..

+1

[Anonymous]

I used to go to lunch with female colleagues all the time in my 20’s - 40’s. I only cheated with a couple if them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last year my now fiance, then girlfriend complained about a coworker that she hated. She hated the co-worker because according to my fiance the girl liked a male co-worker and was jealous of their friendship.
My fiance swore at the time they were just friends, the girl was crazy, and the guy was not at all what she was interested in. My fiance is just a super friendly and outgoing person.
I believed her because the girl did some weird stuff.
Recently it was brought to my attention that my fiance may not have been totally innocent in this. Example leaving messages on his Facebook and going to lunch together daily, Starbucks cashier thought they were dating.
I know it sounds stupid. She doesn't see any of these people anymore.
I just have this weird gut feeling.

You sound like you have been stalking or investigating. How do you know what the barista thought?

BTW, people don’t have sex at Starbucks.

a) you would never say this if OP were a female - you'd be cheering the woman for doing the right thing (i.e., investigating her gut feeling)

b) you clearly don't have an exciting sex life. A quickie in the bathroom at Starbucks or a restaurant is hot and awesome - adding the right amount of spice/danger that anyone could hear you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How exactly were these FB messages brought to your attention?

I saw some of the messages back when they were originally posted and one of the people I saw recently referenced them.


At the time the message that was most off was him posting a meme referencing work boyfriend's and forgetting about the actual boyfriend. Stupid. And she said she told him that that kind of thing wasn't ok, and I didn't think anything of it at the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last year my now fiance, then girlfriend complained about a coworker that she hated. She hated the co-worker because according to my fiance the girl liked a male co-worker and was jealous of their friendship.
My fiance swore at the time they were just friends, the girl was crazy, and the guy was not at all what she was interested in. My fiance is just a super friendly and outgoing person.
I believed her because the girl did some weird stuff.
Recently it was brought to my attention that my fiance may not have been totally innocent in this. Example leaving messages on his Facebook and going to lunch together daily, Starbucks cashier thought they were dating.
I know it sounds stupid. She doesn't see any of these people anymore.
I just have this weird gut feeling.

You sound like you have been stalking or investigating. How do you know what the barista thought?

BTW, people don’t have sex at Starbucks.

a) you would never say this if OP were a female - you'd be cheering the woman for doing the right thing (i.e., investigating her gut feeling)

b) you clearly don't have an exciting sex life. A quickie in the bathroom at Starbucks or a restaurant is hot and awesome - adding the right amount of spice/danger that anyone could hear you.

a) No, I would not. I would chastise her just the same. Did you create this whole thread to try to make an argument about double standards? So this is a straw man troll post?

b) I know you think that’s funny. *Blank look..*