Friendship issue that is taking a toll on my mental health. I need advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can anyone hazard a guess as to why people do this? This seems like...slightly pathological behavior.

Did you read the post above? Women often do this when the men they are partnered with are jealous and controlling. That's the guess.

[Anonymous]

But why not at least acknowledge the disappearance in the work emails, which presumably controlling bf won’t see??

[Anonymous]

I have a close friend who has not 100 percent cut me off but close. I do think some women get weirdly controlling around their relationships. In this case I think she wanted to project the idea of perfection and that does not allow for any close friendships.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the PP who suggested the fiancee could be incredibly controlling. One of the things people like that do is alienate their new girlfriend/boyfriend from all other friends and family. Have other friends also been ghosted? Have you talked to any of her family members? That may be a non-confrontational way to get a better handle on the situation.

If it turns out that she has been cutting many people out since the fiancee showed up, consider that the business transaction may be one of her last lines to the outside world because it hasn't been identified as something her fiancee needed to break. Absolutely move on for your own health and well being, but leave the door open in case your friend ever realizes that she needs to leave and needs somewhere to go.

[Anonymous]

I see it differently. I don't think it's the boyfriend, I think the other person thinks the OP hurt or slighted them in some way and instead of letting her know, they froze her out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I see it differently. I don't think it's the boyfriend, I think the other person thinks the OP hurt or slighted them in some way and instead of letting her know, they froze her out.

if that were the case they'd not ask OP to do work, surely they'd take it elsewhere.

that's what's really weird about this situation for me - she's moved OP from friend zone to business zone and if you were dismissing a friend for insulting you or hurting you, this wouldn't be the normal route at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I see it differently. I don't think it's the boyfriend, I think the other person thinks the OP hurt or slighted them in some way and instead of letting her know, they froze her out.

But then why pursue them for work? That does not make sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see it differently. I don't think it's the boyfriend, I think the other person thinks the OP hurt or slighted them in some way and instead of letting her know, they froze her out.

But then why pursue them for work? That does not make sense.

Maybe just until the person found a replacement.

[Anonymous]

I have ghosted a friend before. It was a very painful time in my life and I just couldn't be in the friendship anymore because she couldn't see it. That being said, I would not be able to maintain a business relationship either. That is highly odd.

Interesingly, another friend ghosted me about a year ago, and I reached out to her for purely professional reasons and it was fine.

Humans are strange.

[Anonymous]

She sees you as a threat to her personal life. Maybe her bf found you attractive and has mentioned it to her. Most probably you've done nothing wrong.