47.2 is the most miserable age

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is it because of teenagers? I'm younger, but I had my kids young. Teenagers are wearing me down. Way down.

Hopefully they launch. Please god let them launch.

Oh honey, have you had the lovely experience of adding a parent with angry, hostile, mean, agitated dementia to that? Nothing like getting venom from both sides. It's a special taste of H&ll when elderly parents act like hostile teenagers, but you know it will only get worse and at least teenagers get better.

[Anonymous]

I’m 60 and in spite of my husband having cancer, I am happy as a person. My kids are married and successful. Hang in there guys!

[Anonymous]

If you dig in a little further on the research:

In the U.S., there was a slightly larger gap between peak male unhappiness and that of their female counterparts. Happiness among American males reaches a minimum in their early 50s, whereas women experience peak unhappiness in their late 30s.

[Anonymous]

My peak of unhappiness was definitely late 20s. My mom died after a short illness, my first husband died unexpectedly, my first child was fighting a life-changing illness. I put one foot in front of the other for a couple of years until life feel real again. I'm 47.5 now and life is really, really good. I'm hoping I just got my low point out of the way early.

[Anonymous]

When our memories outweigh our dreams, it is then that we become old.

Bill Clinton

[Anonymous]

48-52 have been a low point for me. Depression, menopause, joint pain, moves for dh's career, loss of all remaining parents, out of control anxiety. Feel like I am just now coming out of it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For most people, 47.2 is probably the average sandwich age--working hard with kids to support, and with parents who are aging.

It was when my dad recovered from chemo and was cleared of cancer. Very happy, life was good until 47.8 the worst of my life—cancer came back aggressively, he was in and out of hospital. I watched him disappear before my eyes, hospice at home and died when I was 47.11. We were incredibly close.

Pretty much sucks at 49.11 now.

[Anonymous]

47 was a busy, good year for me. I was exercising, my kids were older elementary and middle school - involved in lots of activities, easy kids.

48 was probably my most stressful year. We had to contend with a sudden job relocation move and that meant a month of intense, back breaking labor - getting the house decluttered/pared down, moving stuff to storage, getting the yard trimmed/spiffed up, painting, deep cleaning and then moving out of the house while the house was shown/under contract/sold. Also it meant moving our rising Hs and MS kids to brand new school systems, in a different state when our new home was still under construction. We lived in hotels at first and then a temp apartment and had to commute to their schools every day.

Pile on overseeing the construction of our house...it was just a lot all at once. Then when the house was completed, moving, yet again, from our rental to the house. It was a crazy, back breaking year. Thank God I went into it in fairly decent shape.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:47 was a busy, good year for me. I was exercising, my kids were older elementary and middle school - involved in lots of activities, easy kids.

48 was probably my most stressful year. We had to contend with a sudden job relocation move and that meant a month of intense, back breaking labor - getting the house decluttered/pared down, moving stuff to storage, getting the yard trimmed/spiffed up, painting, deep cleaning and then moving out of the house while the house was shown/under contract/sold. Also it meant moving our rising Hs and MS kids to brand new school systems, in a different state when our new home was still under construction. We lived in hotels at first and then a temp apartment and had to commute to their schools every day.

Pile on overseeing the construction of our house...it was just a lot all at once. Then when the house was completed, moving, yet again, from our rental to the house. It was a crazy, back breaking year. Thank God I went into it in fairly decent shape.

48 was my low point as well. My mom died of cancer and Trump was elected shortly thereafter. We all still miss her every day. I hate that we never got to hear her commentary on the current political situation. She was a Republican for most of her voting life and loved to talk politics.

[Anonymous]

56 low point for me

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:47 was a busy, good year for me. I was exercising, my kids were older elementary and middle school - involved in lots of activities, easy kids.

48 was probably my most stressful year. We had to contend with a sudden job relocation move and that meant a month of intense, back breaking labor - getting the house decluttered/pared down, moving stuff to storage, getting the yard trimmed/spiffed up, painting, deep cleaning and then moving out of the house while the house was shown/under contract/sold. Also it meant moving our rising Hs and MS kids to brand new school systems, in a different state when our new home was still under construction. We lived in hotels at first and then a temp apartment and had to commute to their schools every day.

Pile on overseeing the construction of our house...it was just a lot all at once. Then when the house was completed, moving, yet again, from our rental to the house. It was a crazy, back breaking year. Thank God I went into it in fairly decent shape.

48 was my low point as well. My mom died of cancer and Trump was elected shortly thereafter. We all still miss her every day. I hate that we never got to hear her commentary on the current political situation. She was a Republican for most of her voting life and loved to talk politics.

We also had a death in the family shortly after we moved into our new house. 48 had it's highs and lows no doubt about it. It was the year that our lives were upended in more ways than one. It was a very intense year of never ending stress. 49 was easier, thank goodness. I don't know that I would have survived another 48, lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:56 low point for me

I'm turning 54 soon, dh will be 56 soon. What did you find difficult about 56?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is it because of teenagers? I'm younger, but I had my kids young. Teenagers are wearing me down. Way down.

Hopefully they launch. Please god let them launch.

Oh honey, have you had the lovely experience of adding a parent with angry, hostile, mean, agitated dementia to that? Nothing like getting venom from both sides. It's a special taste of H&ll when elderly parents act like hostile teenagers, but you know it will only get worse and at least teenagers get better.

PP here, I'm lucky that my teens and my elderly mom are not necessarily difficult people. But just dealing with the kids' stuff and then the phone rings and having to switch gears and help an elderly parent with some random, out of left field (time consuming) thing...it is sort of draining.

When our parents were our age their kids were launched already so we really don't have a memory of our parents juggling both teens/tweens and elderly parents at the same time. It's hard and feels sort of thankless at times. It makes me feel like I'm half azzing everything because there is always something.

[Anonymous]

For me it started shortly after my 49th. birthday. I’m now 51, still waiting for it to get better!
I may be doing a little better, not as anxious.

[Anonymous]

I just...don't believe this. Things are pretty a-ok over here. I mean, we have had our struggles to be sure, but DAMN, people.