Neighbor with guns

Anonymous
I live in NH and a lot of people have guns. You never see them though, they are all responsible gun owners. Plus , kids know basic gun safety like a pp mentioned. There is no reason that you cannot politely ask where/how they store their guns
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Our neighbor has guns. There are constant offers for my DC to come over there but I'm not comfortable with that. Do I tell my tween DC why they can't go over to play or just keep saying no? My concern is that they'll start saying, "No, my mom doesn't want me to come over because you have guns." Or do I just tell the parent why I don't want my DC over there?


Talk to the parents. If they are responsible, they will understand, and will talk about how they keep them in some type of a safe.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If they’re military they shouldn’t mind a frank discussion about safety and Storage.


+1 Military and former military aren’t the gun nuts who lose their sh!t if you ask about gun safety.

Retired military. We have guns. All locked up in a safe. Except one that is in a display case on a wall in my husband’s office and demilitarized (as in it cannot fire - the firing pin has been removed). Honestly people close to us assume/know we have guns, but acquaintances don’t know. It’s not like we take them out when kids have play dates. They are only out when my husband is taking them to/from the range or to/from hunting (and yes we eat the venison when he kills a deer, but usually he doesn't kill anything, he just likes to sit in the woods in the peace and quiet).
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Our neighbor has guns.


Better stay on their good side.
Anonymous
Chances are very good many of your kid’s friends are living in homes where a gun is located. As they age, many of their friends will own guns to shoot and hunt. It is absolutely fine to discuss gun ownership and storage with anyone. No parent will object. Yes, even still, it is important to talk to your kids about gun safety starting young (5 or 6). At that age, if you do not have a gun in your house, conversations with people they know while you are present, is a good start.

As kids get older conversations need to continue. The emphasis is that guns are a fact of American life, but they are never cool. They are always dangerous tools that must be handled correctly always. Continued conversations with older folks they know are good. My two youngest were Boy Scouts and gun safety was part of their camping experience for years. That was good. But there are other ways to get similar training. The key is that you want your kids to treat every gun as potentially dangerous. There is no safe gun for a 6 year old. For a 20 year old they should know how to treat a gun and always assume it is loaded.

I have a friend who tells the story of being at a friend of his home and looking at a rifle hung on a wall in the family room as decoration. It was very old and belonged to a long deceased family member. This was in an area where everyone hunted and fished, and not the only gun in this house. With permission he took it down from the wall, and by his own long standing training he checked to see if it was loaded. It was.

His experience would not be unique. Every gun. Every time must be assumed to be loaded until you know for sure it is not. Even decorator pieces hanging on a wall.

A word for Scouts as an aside. My 17 year old son went deer hunting for the first time with his cousins and uncle. They have a couple blinds set up near wood lots on the family farm. We have a 22 that the kids shoot in the summer at targets, and he has done shooting with Scouts over the years. The cousins and uncle had him shoot one of grandpas old deer rifles at a target they use for practice. At 100 yds he was 5 for 5 in the bullseye (which they all could do too) They said he would be fine. That really would all be due to his experience with Scouts over the years.

The next day hunting the morning session had no shot opportunities. The late afternoon session had more deer but nothing worth getting until about 5 when a 8 point came out. Not big enough generally for them as they have gotten picky in order to build the buck population but it was his first time so his cousins said to get it if he could. He said he finally got a good shot opportunity at 150 yards and dropped it where it stood with a shot through the heart. He is now “Bullseye” as even his uncles said they have always had to track a deer for some distance after shooting one. They rarely drop where they are shot.







Anonymous
Speak to the parents. Overall, do not allow your child to go to any house if you are not comfortable and trust your gut.

We used to have guns locked in a hidden safe in our bedroom. I guarantee our neighbors did not know. We would only take them to the shooting range. I would have had an open and honest conversation with anyone who asked.
Anonymous
According to Gallup, 43 percent of US households have a gun. You should always assume there is a gun in your neighbor's house, because the odds are pretty good. Whether they are stored safely, with ammo locked and separate from the weapon, is a different story. Teach your kids about gun safety, about not touching, leaving the room, telling an adult.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:According to Gallup, 43 percent of US households have a gun. You should always assume there is a gun in your neighbor's house, because the odds are pretty good. Whether they are stored safely, with ammo locked and separate from the weapon, is a different story. Teach your kids about gun safety, about not touching, leaving the room, telling an adult.


ITA. We have a gun and I doubt anyone would guess. It is secure. I would be happy to describe how, if asked by a fellow parent or neighbor. I have never been.

We also have a pool and it is FAR more dangerous to potential young visitors than our locked up gun. Our youngest child just turned 9.

Ask the neighbors if you want to- I doubt they will mind.

I do wonder- do you trust your child? It is not fail proof but you seem to leave him/her out of the equation. Have that conversation.

Anonymous
I’d definitely feel free to ask the neighbor about gun safety- we have a gun and I’d be happy to discuss this with anyone who asked.

Will the parents be home when your DC visits? My tweens are not allowed to visit homes where parents are not home, and are not allowed to have friends over if we are not home- barring brief times with kids/parents that we know well and have discussed beforehand. This helps.

I will say that if your child is a tween this is only the beginning- many homes will have “forbidden” items and/or friends will encourage them to do things that are unsafe or against family rules. This is on your own child as an individual and he/she needs to learn that now. If he isn’t trustworthy then unfortunately I would not allow him at most friends’ homes TBH. With tweens, the supervision tends to be hands off.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If they’re military they shouldn’t mind a frank discussion about safety and Storage.


+1 Military and former military aren’t the gun nuts who lose their sh!t if you ask about gun safety.



+2. Former military and now law enforcement husband. DH encourages and reminds other parents to ask about firearms in our house.

OP - ask. Always ask and talk about it with the parents. Always. No responsible gun owner would ever have an issue with this discussion. Anyone who does get an attitude about it, thats information for you too and don’t let your child play there.
Anonymous
+3 former military and a mom. Military people tend to strictly adhere to gun safety as it is an engrained part of that culture. Even gun "mistakes" like failing to clear a weapon are harshly punished. Our guns are in safes within safes and the ammo is in a different safe. Also, they wouldn't mind at all if you ask about storage- it's a reasonable question.
Anonymous
Just for the record, since some people here seem to not realize this. In DC, very, very few law abiding people keep firearms in their homes. This is because it's against the law, big time, in DC to have firearms or even ammo in your possession. It's extremely difficult to get a permit to keep one if your job doesn't require it. In MD people can keep long guns (basic rifles and shotguns) easily but pistols require licensing. In VA it's practically anything goes.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Just for the record, since some people here seem to not realize this. In DC, very, very few law abiding people keep firearms in their homes. This is because it's against the law, big time, in DC to have firearms or even ammo in your possession. It's extremely difficult to get a permit to keep one if your job doesn't require it. In MD people can keep long guns (basic rifles and shotguns) easily but pistols require licensing. In VA it's practically anything goes.


You haven't got the slightest idea what you are talking about. Have you ever heard of the Supreme Court's Heller decision? Or the Wrenn decision?

In DC, law abiding adults can own handguns and long guns. They must be registered, but DC's longstanding prohibition on registering new handguns was struck down in Heller. There is a list of handguns that are approved and a list of long guns banned for scary features, but nothing too extensive. DC's longstanding refusal to issue handgun carry permits was struck down in Wrenn and DC is now shall issue for such permits. DC requires safe storage, but its requirement that guns be unloaded and unusable was struck down in Heller.

Maryland has no "licensing" requirement to keep either long guns or handguns. Handguns and some long guns have been registered for some years and post-2013 a qualification license has been required for new handgun sales.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If they’re military they shouldn’t mind a frank discussion about safety and Storage.


+1 Military and former military aren’t the gun nuts who lose their sh!t if you ask about gun safety.


This. They should be willing to have a frank talk with about how they keep their guns safe. If they don't, and get offended, they are people to stay away from.

I would assume most people here do have guns in their houses. Almost everyone we know does, and we even live in MD.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:According to Gallup, 43 percent of US households have a gun. You should always assume there is a gun in your neighbor's house, because the odds are pretty good. Whether they are stored safely, with ammo locked and separate from the weapon, is a different story. Teach your kids about gun safety, about not touching, leaving the room, telling an adult.


ITA. We have a gun and I doubt anyone would guess. It is secure. I would be happy to describe how, if asked by a fellow parent or neighbor. I have never been.

We also have a pool and it is FAR more dangerous to potential young visitors than our locked up gun. Our youngest child just turned 9.

Ask the neighbors if you want to- I doubt they will mind.

I do wonder- do you trust your child? It is not fail proof but you seem to leave him/her out of the equation. Have that conversation.



I didn't leave him out of the equation. I already said he could not be trusted. He would pick up a gun and handle it if he saw it, no matter what kind of conversation I had about gun safety before hand. That's the kind of kid he is. And since I do not trust my child to be around a gun, I can't leave it up to my neighbors to make sure the gun is safely put away. We had guns when I was growing up. The rule was, no ammo in the house. And yet ammo sometimes appeared. That's life with humans and guns....

Anyway, I told my DC why he was not going over there. Also told him to keep it to himself, as I don't know who else knows about the guns or if our neighbor would want that info out there.

Thanks for all the suggestions.
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