normal weight for DD?

[Anonymous]

Yes, it is normal. What is her age?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it is normal. What is her age?

DD is 14, her led isn’t not worried but I’ve noticed some suspicious eating bheavoirs.

[Anonymous]

"That’s a BMI of 16.9. How old is she? That’s pretty thin for someone who has gone through puberty.

Not really. Unless, as a PP noted, this is a change from before."

At 14, just a generic "change from before" on the growth charts also isn't enough.

If she just grew a lot, it could take a while for her weight to catch up.

If she has been this height for a while and has dropped weight to get to 108, especially if she is eating suspiciously, that would be more concerning.

But our DC's cross country season just ended and I watched several freshmen girls drop 10 or 15 pounds because they have never done anywhere close to that amount of exercise.

One bottom line would be, if she is eating suspiciously, talk to her about it. During the conversation DO NOT bring up her weight. Her weight really is not a problem if day by day she is getting all the nutrients she needs.

If you are not sure about nutrients, take her to her doctor and get some blood work done. Blood work isn't done routinely every year.

[Anonymous]

Doctors are not trained in eating disorders. They frequently do not recognize them until the child needs to go inpatient.

Pay attention to your instincts. Know that IF she has an eating disorder, part of the disease is that she won’t believe she is sick. It’s fine to talk to her about it, but please know the vast majority of teens with anorexia will deny it when confronted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it is normal. What is her age?

DD is 14, her led isn’t not worried but I’ve noticed some suspicious eating bheavoirs.

Normal at 14. As in, nobody would bat an eye at this, other than obese family members trying to convince themselves that something is wrong with her, when they don't want to face the reality that this is normal, always been normal at that age. Now if she was 30...

[Anonymous]

My son is that exact height and weight but he’s 12.5. He doesn’t look unhealthily thin at all (and he isn’t unhealthy).

[Anonymous]

I'm one of the posters on this forum who always and immediately thinks of anorexia and other eating disorders when people bring up concerns about their children.

It isn't that I am trying to diagnose everyone with anorexia or that I won't be happy until everyone admits their kids have anorexia.

It's just that anorexia is SO HARD to treat once it gets entrenched and SO MANY PARENTS I talk to knew felt or wondered if there was something going on months before anyone took it seriously (doctors etc). There are warning signs and the earlier you get involved the easier it is to turn it around.

The best thing you can do right now is get ahold of your child's height and weight records since she was a toddler, plot the information on something like mygrowthcharts.com . https://mygrowthcharts.com

and educate yourself a little bit on eating disorders if you suspect disordered eating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm one of the posters on this forum who always and immediately thinks of anorexia and other eating disorders when people bring up concerns about their children.

It isn't that I am trying to diagnose everyone with anorexia or that I won't be happy until everyone admits their kids have anorexia.

It's just that anorexia is SO HARD to treat once it gets entrenched and SO MANY PARENTS I talk to knew felt or wondered if there was something going on months before anyone took it seriously (doctors etc). There are warning signs and the earlier you get involved the easier it is to turn it around.

The best thing you can do right now is get ahold of your child's height and weight records since she was a toddler, plot the information on something like mygrowthcharts.com . https://mygrowthcharts.com

and educate yourself a little bit on eating disorders if you suspect disordered eating.

So you know you are projecting, right? Prevalence of anorexia is around 3.8% in women, per some studies. I am truly sorry you or your child are going/went through something like this. I too am prone to seeing anxiety in teens because my ds has it so severely. But, we have to stop projecting our issues onto other people and onto other children. It is not a competition as to who has it worse. People that see illness in everything, need to face that it is not everywhere. My dd's best friend is 18 and very skinny, she eats like a horse. OP, said she is mindful of some behavior changes in her dd, but she seems wise about not making a big deal about it YET.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm one of the posters on this forum who always and immediately thinks of anorexia and other eating disorders when people bring up concerns about their children.

It isn't that I am trying to diagnose everyone with anorexia or that I won't be happy until everyone admits their kids have anorexia.

It's just that anorexia is SO HARD to treat once it gets entrenched and SO MANY PARENTS I talk to knew felt or wondered if there was something going on months before anyone took it seriously (doctors etc). There are warning signs and the earlier you get involved the easier it is to turn it around.

The best thing you can do right now is get ahold of your child's height and weight records since she was a toddler, plot the information on something like mygrowthcharts.com . https://mygrowthcharts.com

and educate yourself a little bit on eating disorders if you suspect disordered eating.

So you know you are projecting, right? Prevalence of anorexia is around 3.8% in women, per some studies. I am truly sorry you or your child are going/went through something like this. I too am prone to seeing anxiety in teens because my ds has it so severely. But, we have to stop projecting our issues onto other people and onto other children. It is not a competition as to who has it worse. People that see illness in everything, need to face that it is not everywhere. My dd's best friend is 18 and very skinny, she eats like a horse. OP, said she is mindful of some behavior changes in her dd, but she seems wise about not making a big deal about it YET.

i'm not projecting anything.

I'm letting OP know that it is much easier to turn anorexia around if you intervene immediately. So if you suspect it do NOT delay.

My daughter went through this, my niece went through this (lasted 3 years but she is well now), my friend's daughter went through this (second year of dealing with it- inpatient treatment), and now another friend's daughter is going through through this. This latest friend saw the warning signs a year ago, but didn't want to overreact. Unfortunately now it is a crisis situation. I feel so bad for her.

I do NOT need to see illness everywhere. I am not making a diagnosis for OP. I am telling her it is OK to look into it, and if she has concerns act immediately -- educate yourself because the consequences of waiting are extreme.

[Anonymous]

I mean, if the child has an eating disorder, the consequences of waiting are extreme.

It is a very very hard illness to treat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm one of the posters on this forum who always and immediately thinks of anorexia and other eating disorders when people bring up concerns about their children.

It isn't that I am trying to diagnose everyone with anorexia or that I won't be happy until everyone admits their kids have anorexia.

It's just that anorexia is SO HARD to treat once it gets entrenched and SO MANY PARENTS I talk to knew felt or wondered if there was something going on months before anyone took it seriously (doctors etc). There are warning signs and the earlier you get involved the easier it is to turn it around.

The best thing you can do right now is get ahold of your child's height and weight records since she was a toddler, plot the information on something like mygrowthcharts.com . https://mygrowthcharts.com

and educate yourself a little bit on eating disorders if you suspect disordered eating.

So you know you are projecting, right? Prevalence of anorexia is around 3.8% in women, per some studies. I am truly sorry you or your child are going/went through something like this. I too am prone to seeing anxiety in teens because my ds has it so severely. But, we have to stop projecting our issues onto other people and onto other children. It is not a competition as to who has it worse. People that see illness in everything, need to face that it is not everywhere. My dd's best friend is 18 and very skinny, she eats like a horse. OP, said she is mindful of some behavior changes in her dd, but she seems wise about not making a big deal about it YET.

i'm not projecting anything.

I'm letting OP know that it is much easier to turn anorexia around if you intervene immediately. So if you suspect it do NOT delay.

My daughter went through this, my niece went through this (lasted 3 years but she is well now), my friend's daughter went through this (second year of dealing with it- inpatient treatment), and now another friend's daughter is going through through this. This latest friend saw the warning signs a year ago, but didn't want to overreact. Unfortunately now it is a crisis situation. I feel so bad for her.

I do NOT need to see illness everywhere. I am not making a diagnosis for OP. I am telling her it is OK to look into it, and if she has concerns act immediately -- educate yourself because the consequences of waiting are extreme.

]
Given what you just wrote, it sounds to me you and your family and friends are toxic parents who caused this. What is the chance of all these kids in one family and among your friends (like minded people likely) going through the same thing? If I were you, I would take a good look in the mirror. It is almost always the parents that cause most issues in kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm one of the posters on this forum who always and immediately thinks of anorexia and other eating disorders when people bring up concerns about their children.

It isn't that I am trying to diagnose everyone with anorexia or that I won't be happy until everyone admits their kids have anorexia.

It's just that anorexia is SO HARD to treat once it gets entrenched and SO MANY PARENTS I talk to knew felt or wondered if there was something going on months before anyone took it seriously (doctors etc). There are warning signs and the earlier you get involved the easier it is to turn it around.

The best thing you can do right now is get ahold of your child's height and weight records since she was a toddler, plot the information on something like mygrowthcharts.com . https://mygrowthcharts.com

and educate yourself a little bit on eating disorders if you suspect disordered eating.

So you know you are projecting, right? Prevalence of anorexia is around 3.8% in women, per some studies. I am truly sorry you or your child are going/went through something like this. I too am prone to seeing anxiety in teens because my ds has it so severely. But, we have to stop projecting our issues onto other people and onto other children. It is not a competition as to who has it worse. People that see illness in everything, need to face that it is not everywhere. My dd's best friend is 18 and very skinny, she eats like a horse. OP, said she is mindful of some behavior changes in her dd, but she seems wise about not making a big deal about it YET.

i'm not projecting anything.

I'm letting OP know that it is much easier to turn anorexia around if you intervene immediately. So if you suspect it do NOT delay.

My daughter went through this, my niece went through this (lasted 3 years but she is well now), my friend's daughter went through this (second year of dealing with it- inpatient treatment), and now another friend's daughter is going through through this. This latest friend saw the warning signs a year ago, but didn't want to overreact. Unfortunately now it is a crisis situation. I feel so bad for her.

I do NOT need to see illness everywhere. I am not making a diagnosis for OP. I am telling her it is OK to look into it, and if she has concerns act immediately -- educate yourself because the consequences of waiting are extreme.

]
Given what you just wrote, it sounds to me you and your family and friends are toxic parents who caused this. What is the chance of all these kids in one family and among your friends (like minded people likely) going through the same thing? If I were you, I would take a good look in the mirror. It is almost always the parents that cause most issues in kids.

I'm not the PP, but wow, what an unnecessary and rude thing to say. You are a cruel person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm one of the posters on this forum who always and immediately thinks of anorexia and other eating disorders when people bring up concerns about their children.

It isn't that I am trying to diagnose everyone with anorexia or that I won't be happy until everyone admits their kids have anorexia.

It's just that anorexia is SO HARD to treat once it gets entrenched and SO MANY PARENTS I talk to knew felt or wondered if there was something going on months before anyone took it seriously (doctors etc). There are warning signs and the earlier you get involved the easier it is to turn it around.

The best thing you can do right now is get ahold of your child's height and weight records since she was a toddler, plot the information on something like mygrowthcharts.com . https://mygrowthcharts.com

and educate yourself a little bit on eating disorders if you suspect disordered eating.

So you know you are projecting, right? Prevalence of anorexia is around 3.8% in women, per some studies. I am truly sorry you or your child are going/went through something like this. I too am prone to seeing anxiety in teens because my ds has it so severely. But, we have to stop projecting our issues onto other people and onto other children. It is not a competition as to who has it worse. People that see illness in everything, need to face that it is not everywhere. My dd's best friend is 18 and very skinny, she eats like a horse. OP, said she is mindful of some behavior changes in her dd, but she seems wise about not making a big deal about it YET.

i'm not projecting anything.

I'm letting OP know that it is much easier to turn anorexia around if you intervene immediately. So if you suspect it do NOT delay.

My daughter went through this, my niece went through this (lasted 3 years but she is well now), my friend's daughter went through this (second year of dealing with it- inpatient treatment), and now another friend's daughter is going through through this. This latest friend saw the warning signs a year ago, but didn't want to overreact. Unfortunately now it is a crisis situation. I feel so bad for her.

I do NOT need to see illness everywhere. I am not making a diagnosis for OP. I am telling her it is OK to look into it, and if she has concerns act immediately -- educate yourself because the consequences of waiting are extreme.

]
Given what you just wrote, it sounds to me you and your family and friends are toxic parents who caused this. What is the chance of all these kids in one family and among your friends (like minded people likely) going through the same thing? If I were you, I would take a good look in the mirror. It is almost always the parents that cause most issues in kids.

I'm not the PP, but wow, what an unnecessary and rude thing to say. You are a cruel person.

Sure, I agree. But, my reply was well meaning and look at her reply to me. I laid myself bare saying I do the same bcs of my ds. I admitted I do the same for anxiety and need to stop. And what was her reply? We have it and all we know have it and I am not projecting. That was defensive and she knows somewhere that I hit on something. If you read my post above, it was not rude nor did it require her to be so defensive. I stand by what I said. People who can't accept a different point of view are usually the cause of issues. I accepted that I could have caused some of my ds's anxiety and I am mindful not to cause more and project onto other people my issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm one of the posters on this forum who always and immediately thinks of anorexia and other eating disorders when people bring up concerns about their children.

It isn't that I am trying to diagnose everyone with anorexia or that I won't be happy until everyone admits their kids have anorexia.

It's just that anorexia is SO HARD to treat once it gets entrenched and SO MANY PARENTS I talk to knew felt or wondered if there was something going on months before anyone took it seriously (doctors etc). There are warning signs and the earlier you get involved the easier it is to turn it around.

The best thing you can do right now is get ahold of your child's height and weight records since she was a toddler, plot the information on something like mygrowthcharts.com . https://mygrowthcharts.com

and educate yourself a little bit on eating disorders if you suspect disordered eating.

So you know you are projecting, right? Prevalence of anorexia is around 3.8% in women, per some studies. I am truly sorry you or your child are going/went through something like this. I too am prone to seeing anxiety in teens because my ds has it so severely. But, we have to stop projecting our issues onto other people and onto other children. It is not a competition as to who has it worse. People that see illness in everything, need to face that it is not everywhere. My dd's best friend is 18 and very skinny, she eats like a horse. OP, said she is mindful of some behavior changes in her dd, but she seems wise about not making a big deal about it YET.

i'm not projecting anything.

I'm letting OP know that it is much easier to turn anorexia around if you intervene immediately. So if you suspect it do NOT delay.

My daughter went through this, my niece went through this (lasted 3 years but she is well now), my friend's daughter went through this (second year of dealing with it- inpatient treatment), and now another friend's daughter is going through through this. This latest friend saw the warning signs a year ago, but didn't want to overreact. Unfortunately now it is a crisis situation. I feel so bad for her.

I do NOT need to see illness everywhere. I am not making a diagnosis for OP. I am telling her it is OK to look into it, and if she has concerns act immediately -- educate yourself because the consequences of waiting are extreme.

+1000000

(And-- DP who cruelly and ignorantly suggested that this posted "caused" her daughter's eating disorders-- you are clueless and should stop talking now. Parents do not cause eating disorders.)

OP, since you say you are seeing concerning eating behavior with your girl, you are right to be worried. My DD had anorexia as a young teen and it took me a long time to spot the signs-- by the time she was diagnosed it was too late to treat her safely at home and she ended up in the hospital for a week. (She's in excellent recovery now.) I recommend the amazing parents and caregivers at www.feast-ed.org if you want to discuss your concerns on the "around the FEAST table" discussion board, and learn about warning signs and other ED facts.

[Anonymous]

Just jumping in to say that there is a strong genetic component to eating disorders.

Parents can pass down genes, but parenting styles do not cause eating disorders.