At what point do I stop fighting the coat battle?

[Anonymous]

Does he also wear shorts in winter? Teen boys are friggin idiots when it comes to wardrobe stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I stopped at 8. Natural consequences.

No one has lost a finger to frostbite yet.

Teachers in grade school ask you to send a coat, or at very least keep one at the school.

My DD’s 3rd grade teacher sends the no-coat kids to the library instead of our to recess. Doesn’t take long for them to decide some kind of jacket is acceptable. (At our school it’s not a financial issue.)

[Anonymous]

DS is 8 and is just starting to want to do stuff like not wear a coat or wear shorts in colder weather. What I've always told him is that he has plenty of choices with other things in his life, but when it comes to his health and safety we are in charge and there are no negotiations about it. It's not about that he doesn't actually feel cold. He walked the dog with me last night and was almost crying because he was so cold wearing the jacket that he didn't want to put on this morning. It's for show and because that's what other kids are doing (because their parents allow it and just want to stop fighting the battle so they give in).

There are some battles worth fighting and and I'm not having a battle with my 8 year old about wearing a coat when it's 20 something degrees. There is no choice for him in that matter. If I allow it to be a choice for him now, what am I conditioning him for later when he thinks he can just wear me down if he complains enough about things that are much more important? I'm not setting that precedent as a parent. You do you, though.

[Anonymous]

DS is 8 and is just starting to want to do stuff like not wear a coat or wear shorts in colder weather. What I've always told him is that he has plenty of choices with other things in his life, but when it comes to his health and safety we are in charge and there are no negotiations about it. It's not about that he doesn't actually feel cold. He walked the dog with me last night and was almost crying because he was so cold wearing the jacket that he didn't want to put on this morning. It's for show and because that's what other kids are doing (because their parents allow it and just want to stop fighting the battle so they give in).

There are some battles worth fighting and and I'm not having a battle with my 8 year old about wearing a coat when it's 20 something degrees. There is no choice for him in that matter. If I allow it to be a choice for him now, what am I conditioning him for later when he thinks he can just wear me down if he complains enough about things that are much more important? I'm not setting that precedent as a parent. You do you, though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS is 8 and is just starting to want to do stuff like not wear a coat or wear shorts in colder weather. What I've always told him is that he has plenty of choices with other things in his life, but when it comes to his health and safety we are in charge and there are no negotiations about it. It's not about that he doesn't actually feel cold. He walked the dog with me last night and was almost crying because he was so cold wearing the jacket that he didn't want to put on this morning. It's for show and because that's what other kids are doing (because their parents allow it and just want to stop fighting the battle so they give in).

There are some battles worth fighting and and I'm not having a battle with my 8 year old about wearing a coat when it's 20 something degrees. There is no choice for him in that matter. If I allow it to be a choice for him now, what am I conditioning him for later when he thinks he can just wear me down if he complains enough about things that are much more important? I'm not setting that precedent as a parent. You do you, though.

Whoops, meant to post this on the other coat thread. Don't know why it double posted either. My point still stands though.

[Anonymous]

Oh man, this morning my 3 year old insisted on no coat and I didn't bother arguing with her. I made her bring it in case she changes her mind but whatever, this is her cross to die on.

So... 3 is my answer, lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS is 8 and is just starting to want to do stuff like not wear a coat or wear shorts in colder weather. What I've always told him is that he has plenty of choices with other things in his life, but when it comes to his health and safety we are in charge and there are no negotiations about it. It's not about that he doesn't actually feel cold. He walked the dog with me last night and was almost crying because he was so cold wearing the jacket that he didn't want to put on this morning. It's for show and because that's what other kids are doing (because their parents allow it and just want to stop fighting the battle so they give in).

There are some battles worth fighting and and I'm not having a battle with my 8 year old about wearing a coat when it's 20 something degrees. There is no choice for him in that matter. If I allow it to be a choice for him now, what am I conditioning him for later when he thinks he can just wear me down if he complains enough about things that are much more important? I'm not setting that precedent as a parent. You do you, though.

Whoops, meant to post this on the other coat thread. Don't know why it double posted either. My point still stands though.

It's funny, this is pretty similar to my parenting philosophy too but I go in the entire opposite direction with it. I don't want to fight with my kid about every little thing, but when I say something, I mean it. So I choose my battles wisely. Coats isn't one of them that's worth it to me. I have never argued with her in the first place, so it's not something she "wore me down about" - it's something I've established with her is her choice.

[Anonymous]

I say things like "you may want to wear your heavy coat today." or "today is the coldest morning we've had since last winter" and then let them decide which/if any coat to wear.

- mother of 12y and 13y old

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does he also wear shorts in winter? Teen boys are friggin idiots when it comes to wardrobe stuff.

My 12 year old knucklehead does. What killed me was that he would wear his winter coat with them. He finally stopped wearing shorts this past Monday, thank all gods.

[Anonymous]

yes mine are dressed for a blizzard in August at the beach and now they're in shorts and t-shirts.

[Anonymous]

Don’t take him door to door everywhere. Let him walk places, let him experience the cold. He’ll learn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I stopped at 8. Natural consequences.

No one has lost a finger to frostbite yet.

Teachers in grade school ask you to send a coat, or at very least keep one at the school.

Yes, teachers get upset if the kid is not properly dressed for the weather. I've even had other parents on the playground ask about my kid who won't wear a coat She's 12 now.

[Anonymous]

My 14 yr old DS started hating coats in 7th grade. This year, he picked out a North Face jacket without the inner fleece liner and he freely wears it now.

[Anonymous]

Your kid is 13 and therefore in MS, right?
They rarely are outside during the school day minus the bus stop. There's no recess. PE transitioned to Health class now that it's 2nd quarter.
So, they're inside in an overly heated school all day. And if you time the bus arrival just right, you can easily ge away with no jacket for the entire day.

[Anonymous]

I've always insisted she CARRY weather appropriate clothing. If she doesn't want to wear it, fine by me. But I refuse to hear her complain.