Issue with DD Soccer Mentality

[Anonymous]

OP PP here! So we had our first tournament of the season over this weekend with our new coach. As previously mentioned, we just told her to listen to coach.

Our DD did well. The coach actually switched her to a Holding Center Mid Position which she payed most of the tournament. Only 2 of 6 goals were scored against her while playing that position. We only scored 4 goals over the weekend and DD had two of them from the time she did play striker. Despite the losses, she seemed happy and confident about the situation.

It's an odd and an ironic situation. Most of the other players up top are selfish, hence the lack of offense. Will be interesting to see what the coach does moving forward as DD provided half the goals despite the little playing time up top.

[Anonymous]

If she’s so young can’t you just be generally supportive? It is good for her to think of her teammates and also for her to recognize and take advantage of opportunities? I don’t see how this can be a long term skills problem.

[Anonymous]

Also it’s so weird to me how you all say “we.”

[Anonymous]

it's the royal we

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP PP here! So we had our first tournament of the season over this weekend with our new coach. As previously mentioned, we just told her to listen to coach.

Our DD did well. The coach actually switched her to a Holding Center Mid Position which she payed most of the tournament. Only 2 of 6 goals were scored against her while playing that position. We only scored 4 goals over the weekend and DD had two of them from the time she did play striker. Despite the losses, she seemed happy and confident about the situation.

It's an odd and an ironic situation. Most of the other players up top are selfish, hence the lack of offense. Will be interesting to see what the coach does moving forward as DD provided half the goals despite the little playing time up top. [i]

I wouldn't expect much. FWIW, in our experience in our travel club (smaller club, and DD is older than 11), selfish players are rewarded because the club seems to put a premium on ball skills and aggressiveness. Our CMs and strikers dribble and dribble and dribble while the outside players and other mids are waiving their arms, wide open, then the girl with the ball loses it. And the other girls are in the correct position - in space and ready to accept a pass at their feet or in space. Soccer IQ seems to take a back seat to mediocre skills coupled with aggressiveness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP PP here! So we had our first tournament of the season over this weekend with our new coach. As previously mentioned, we just told her to listen to coach.

Our DD did well. The coach actually switched her to a Holding Center Mid Position which she payed most of the tournament. Only 2 of 6 goals were scored against her while playing that position. We only scored 4 goals over the weekend and DD had two of them from the time she did play striker. Despite the losses, she seemed happy and confident about the situation.

It's an odd and an ironic situation. Most of the other players up top are selfish, hence the lack of offense. Will be interesting to see what the coach does moving forward as DD provided half the goals despite the little playing time up top.

Of course she switched to holding mid because she is not creating and finishing scoring chances
She scored 2x ?? How did she score ?? You say when she was up top. Did she create something or pounce on a cross?

Nothing odd or ironic about it. You ar jockeying for your kid to play striker, see other positions as a setback, have formed your own opinion after the first game about all the team players, and your opinion is that your kid is the best and her only problem is she is too unselfish.
Not to be a jerk but possibly if she lives with you she has learned aelfishisness from you and doesn’t like it so doesn’t practice it on the field.
But you keep posting. Updates on her for the world. Maybe she’ll overcome the tragedy befallin her and the coach will realize they are there to promote your daughter alone

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP PP here! So we had our first tournament of the season over this weekend with our new coach. As previously mentioned, we just told her to listen to coach.

Our DD did well. The coach actually switched her to a Holding Center Mid Position which she payed most of the tournament. Only 2 of 6 goals were scored against her while playing that position. We only scored 4 goals over the weekend and DD had two of them from the time she did play striker. Despite the losses, she seemed happy and confident about the situation.

It's an odd and an ironic situation. Most of the other players up top are selfish, hence the lack of offense. Will be interesting to see what the coach does moving forward as DD provided half the goals despite the little playing time up top.

You are spending WAY too much time overthinking this. You say that she was happy and confident with the results of this past weekend. It should end there. Full stop. However, you seem to be very concerned with her teammates and their style of play ("selfishness"). Let your daughter navigate this and, since she is currently "happy and confident", sit back and enjoy watching her play. If she's on a high-level team and continues on that path as she gets older, the pressure will ramp up enough on it's own--she won't need you being overly involved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP PP here! So we had our first tournament of the season over this weekend with our new coach. As previously mentioned, we just told her to listen to coach.

Our DD did well. The coach actually switched her to a Holding Center Mid Position which she payed most of the tournament. Only 2 of 6 goals were scored against her while playing that position. We only scored 4 goals over the weekend and DD had two of them from the time she did play striker. Despite the losses, she seemed happy and confident about the situation.

It's an odd and an ironic situation. Most of the other players up top are selfish, hence the lack of offense. Will be interesting to see what the coach does moving forward as DD provided half the goals despite the little playing time up top.

She is new to the team. You are waaaaaaay over thinking this. Let the year just happen. Good grief.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP PP here! So we had our first tournament of the season over this weekend with our new coach. As previously mentioned, we just told her to listen to coach.

Our DD did well. The coach actually switched her to a Holding Center Mid Position which she payed most of the tournament. Only 2 of 6 goals were scored against her while playing that position. We only scored 4 goals over the weekend and DD had two of them from the time she did play striker. Despite the losses, she seemed happy and confident about the situation.

It's an odd and an ironic situation. Most of the other players up top are selfish, hence the lack of offense. Will be interesting to see what the coach does moving forward as DD provided half the goals despite the little playing time up top. [i]

I wouldn't expect much. FWIW, in our experience in our travel club (smaller club, and DD is older than 11), selfish players are rewarded because the club seems to put a premium on ball skills and aggressiveness. Our CMs and strikers dribble and dribble and dribble while the outside players and other mids are waiving their arms, wide open, then the girl with the ball loses it. And the other girls are in the correct position - in space and ready to accept a pass at their feet or in space. Soccer IQ seems to take a back seat to mediocre skills coupled with aggressiveness.

There are a tiny amount of Clubs that realize a kid that has skill but no soccer IQ or awareness will never be a great player. They value a kid that instinctively knows when to pass v when to dribble. Most of American coaches (even at the very highest level) do not see this. I have spent a lot of time talking to European coaches abroad about this very issue. We select for completely different characteristics in the US which is why we can't get a men's team to qualify for the World Cup----add in politics and a requirement for kids to travel long distances and pay big $ just to be seen and it is a total and complete failure. Beasley recently was quoted talking about the problem with lionizing players at the young ages like travel clubs around here...oh he is the best.ever. and he never gets knocked off the top team, no matter how shitty he ultimately develops....excuses are just made. We don't invest in development.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP PP here! So we had our first tournament of the season over this weekend with our new coach. As previously mentioned, we just told her to listen to coach.

Our DD did well. The coach actually switched her to a Holding Center Mid Position which she payed most of the tournament. Only 2 of 6 goals were scored against her while playing that position. We only scored 4 goals over the weekend and DD had two of them from the time she did play striker. Despite the losses, she seemed happy and confident about the situation.

It's an odd and an ironic situation. Most of the other players up top are selfish, hence the lack of offense. Will be interesting to see what the coach does moving forward as DD provided half the goals despite the little playing time up top.

Of course she switched to holding mid because she is not creating and finishing scoring chances
She scored 2x ?? How did she score ?? You say when she was up top. Did she create something or pounce on a cross?

Nothing odd or ironic about it. You ar jockeying for your kid to play striker, see other positions as a setback, have formed your own opinion after the first game about all the team players, and your opinion is that your kid is the best and her only problem is she is too unselfish.
Not to be a jerk but possibly if she lives with you she has learned aelfishisness from you and doesn’t like it so doesn’t practice it on the field.
But you keep posting. Updates on her for the world. Maybe she’ll overcome the tragedy befallin her and the coach will realize they are there to promote your daughter alone

Not sure if trolling or just dense? DD has been with this team all of last year and this is the start of her 2nd season with them. Led this team in both goals and assists last year '18-'19. Maybe read the original post again.

Goals were scored by creating and also a high soccer IQ play. I am happy she is playing other positions and it will make her much more valuable in the long run if she sticks with the game. Was just asking advice on how to deal/talk with her about the issue she had been struggling with. Seems she will get a good mix this year which actually is best case scenario for the existing complex.

Thanks to those who actually gave constructive advice.

/thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP PP here! So we had our first tournament of the season over this weekend with our new coach. As previously mentioned, we just told her to listen to coach.

Our DD did well. The coach actually switched her to a Holding Center Mid Position which she payed most of the tournament. Only 2 of 6 goals were scored against her while playing that position. We only scored 4 goals over the weekend and DD had two of them from the time she did play striker. Despite the losses, she seemed happy and confident about the situation.

It's an odd and an ironic situation. Most of the other players up top are selfish, hence the lack of offense. Will be interesting to see what the coach does moving forward as DD provided half the goals despite the little playing time up top.

Of course she switched to holding mid because she is not creating and finishing scoring chances
She scored 2x ?? How did she score ?? You say when she was up top. Did she create something or pounce on a cross?

Nothing odd or ironic about it. You ar jockeying for your kid to play striker, see other positions as a setback, have formed your own opinion after the first game about all the team players, and your opinion is that your kid is the best and her only problem is she is too unselfish.
Not to be a jerk but possibly if she lives with you she has learned aelfishisness from you and doesn’t like it so doesn’t practice it on the field.
But you keep posting. Updates on her for the world. Maybe she’ll overcome the tragedy befallin her and the coach will realize they are there to promote your daughter alone

Not sure if trolling or just dense? DD has been with this team all of last year and this is the start of her 2nd season with them. Led this team in both goals and assists last year '18-'19. Maybe read the original post again.

Goals were scored by creating and also a high soccer IQ play. I am happy she is playing other positions and it will make her much more valuable in the long run if she sticks with the game. Was just asking advice on how to deal/talk with her about the issue she had been struggling with. Seems she will get a good mix this year which actually is best case scenario for the existing complex.

Thanks to those who actually gave constructive advice.

/thread.

You mentioned several times that she is new to the club.

Playing all of last year with them is not new to the club.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP PP here! So we had our first tournament of the season over this weekend with our new coach. As previously mentioned, we just told her to listen to coach.

Our DD did well. The coach actually switched her to a Holding Center Mid Position which she payed most of the tournament. Only 2 of 6 goals were scored against her while playing that position. We only scored 4 goals over the weekend and DD had two of them from the time she did play striker. Despite the losses, she seemed happy and confident about the situation.

It's an odd and an ironic situation. Most of the other players up top are selfish, hence the lack of offense. Will be interesting to see what the coach does moving forward as DD provided half the goals despite the little playing time up top.

Of course she switched to holding mid because she is not creating and finishing scoring chances
She scored 2x ?? How did she score ?? You say when she was up top. Did she create something or pounce on a cross?

Nothing odd or ironic about it. You ar jockeying for your kid to play striker, see other positions as a setback, have formed your own opinion after the first game about all the team players, and your opinion is that your kid is the best and her only problem is she is too unselfish.
Not to be a jerk but possibly if she lives with you she has learned aelfishisness from you and doesn’t like it so doesn’t practice it on the field.
But you keep posting. Updates on her for the world. Maybe she’ll overcome the tragedy befallin her and the coach will realize they are there to promote your daughter alone

Not sure if trolling or just dense? DD has been with this team all of last year and this is the start of her 2nd season with them. Led this team in both goals and assists last year '18-'19. Maybe read the original post again.

Goals were scored by creating and also a high soccer IQ play. I am happy she is playing other positions and it will make her much more valuable in the long run if she sticks with the game. Was just asking advice on how to deal/talk with her about the issue she had been struggling with. Seems she will get a good mix this year which actually is best case scenario for the existing complex.

Thanks to those who actually gave constructive advice.

/thread.

My daughter plays for one of the top ECNL clubs in the country (not in the DC area)... I have never heard of any team tracking goals and assists at U11, so I'm thinking that was probably you. I'm truly trying to give you constructive advice---you are too involved. It's her journey, not yours. Give her space to figure it out on her own. The kids who feel parental pressure (regardless of how well-meaning the parent is) are the ones that burn out by U15/16.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone on her team is saying this to her, and it is getting to her. 100%

and I mean a teammate or teammates. and she doesn't want to say

Correct, there are two team-mates with lesser soccer IQ constantly yelling pass no matter what position they are in. I can only hope our coach is quick to fix it.

Wow that sounds familiar. Happened to DS at same age. Unfortunately the coach did nothing and it turned into a bigger problem. It affected DS’ morale to the point where he wanted to quit. We stuck it out for a while and ended up switching clubs, with new coach with no tolerance for this and more talented/nicer kids. Best thing we ever did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone on her team is saying this to her, and it is getting to her. 100%

and I mean a teammate or teammates. and she doesn't want to say

Correct, there are two team-mates with lesser soccer IQ constantly yelling pass no matter what position they are in. I can only hope our coach is quick to fix it.

Wow that sounds familiar. Happened to DS at same age. Unfortunately the coach did nothing and it turned into a bigger problem. It affected DS’ morale to the point where he wanted to quit. We stuck it out for a while and ended up switching clubs, with new coach with no tolerance for this and more talented/nicer kids. Best thing we ever did.

I don’t know. Some coaches may see potential while it’s obvious the player just doesn’t pass even when they should. Never passing to the point where their next move is completely predictable! It’s frustrating. I feel like it enables them to continue dribbling into a crowd, dribble out of bounds , toe it to the goal, or toe it wherever. You just need to be patient and wait it out unfortunately and hope for the best.