XDH owes child support...wwyd?

[Anonymous]

Child support can be ordered through the court and not through child support office and it does not have to be garnished. OP can still take Dad to court and Dad has to prove the payments if she claims he didn't pay or is behind (she clearly has clear accounting of it). If he is voluntarily paying that amount, then no, he cannot be held accountable but if there is an order/no garnishment, he can be. However, in less she goes through child support enforcement for free, she'll pay more in attorney fees and/or time and she may look bad as he is trying to pay it back. They'd probably put him on a payment plan BUT if he is making less money or there is a change, they can also readjust the child support if his income changed or other circumstances have changed (i.e. older children aged out, alimony ended but continued to be paid, income reduced, etc). So, for a few thousand is it really worth it when he is paying the arrears just not as quickly as she wants. She's getting a pretty decent amount at $1K a month.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because states had to set up state level child support enforcement to qualify for funding under whatever title of the social security act (I think) covers child welfare stuff, the state enforcement people will pursue enforcement--I'm sure even if the money isn't owed to the state (such as in the case of children who have received TANF funds). Which is one reason non-custodial parents should never pay the custodial parent directly--such payments may not be recognized.

Also, uncollectible child support is sometimes enforced by the federal government if the custodial parent is in another state (I know this from federal jury duty).

As long as they are documented, they should be recognized. A parent should not give the other parent cash but if they pay by check, especially if they put that month and child support in the memo it should be fine. My husband's ex took him to court saying that he never paid to get a garnishment (he would have given her one no issue so he didn't have to deal with her) and she claimed he paid nothing and instead he had a $40K overpayment with all the extra's and other demands. They didn't return the money to him and she got the garnishment and child support heavily reduced for other reasons (kids aged out/alimony over several years before that he continued to pay) but it was absolutely recognized. She was really pissed about the garnishment but didn't want to spend the money to go to court to get it removed. She was used him paying at the beginning of the month and going through child support took 2 weeks, sometimes longer to get the check. A few times it didn't come and was garnished so she'd call demanding the money and he said no as it was already garnished so she had to deal with child support. Be careful what you ask for as it could backfire.

In OP case, by the time she misses work, attorney fees it makes no sense as he is paying it back but slowly. The court will probably put him on a payment plan so she's wasting money with two attorneys or if he has to hire an attorney that money he is spending on an attorney is better spent paying her back.

You guys are both really muddying up this issue. If there is a DCSE case (i.e. CS is paid to the state) then no, payments to the custodial parents other than through DCSE will not be recognized because you are paying in a way that is not set forth in the order (i.e. either income withholding or checks made payable to the state).

Yes, they will be recognized as not all child support payments are garnished. My husbands originally were not garnished and he sent a check every month/no issue. It absolutely was recognized along with his overpayments. However, we don't know the arrangement with OP but if there is a court order and its paid outside the state or withholding its still child support. It sounds like there was an order and direct pay or no order and that was just their agreement. It only goes to the child support office if one parent requests it. My husband wished he knew about the child support office/garnishment as it would have been in his interest to have them as an intermediary. It was great when they were involved.

[Anonymous]

OP here. My ex-dh pays the money to child support (DC) and then I get the money through them. The money isn't garnished, he just pays it twice a month. It is court ordered child support.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. My ex-dh pays the money to child support (DC) and then I get the money through them. The money isn't garnished, he just pays it twice a month. It is court ordered child support.

Presumably they have certified his passport then. Honestly, you've got a great deal going on because you're getting more interest on that $4K than could make in the market. Consider it a bond component of your investment portfolio.

[Anonymous]

Go to the court and if they have a self serve file the garnishment papers. Once it goes through they'll simply send a wage packet to his employer. OP you need to do this. My ex changed jobs, and had no intention of letting the court know. I never had a problem until then. It was a bit of a shock, but after a month went by I called him at his office. Funny but his old boss answered, told me he quit and went to a competitor. Wow was she angry, this was defense related job. Anyways, she gave me all his info for the court to send a wage packet to his new employer, LOL. When I called him at his new job he was beyond shocked when I said his old boss gave me his number. He acted like he forgot, but I knew otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Depends on how old the kid is. My DH's ex has not paid a dime since the divorce and her breaking the custody order about 4 years ago. She pretty much checked out and sees my step-DD twice a year for a few days. Are we going to fight it? Absolutely not...step--DD is almost 17. It would be a different story if step-DD would be younger. Just not worth the effort/money/drama involved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Only if he has the money. If he doesn't have the money, don't waste your own on lawyer and court fees trying to get it.

OP here. I don't know if he has the money. FWIW he does pay an extra amount each month to catch up on the arrears but it's not much extra.

He pays a good amount for child support each month. He's trying to pay it back. Why give him a hard time?

because he didn't meet his commitment and she needs the money. jeez people. not everyone can afford to be super-charitable about $4000.

Ghis