Not redshirting our May birthday boy?

[Anonymous]

OP here. We are in Nashville. It may be more common here. I would say most of May boy bdays will be redshirted. Maybe a little more than half of Feb-April and 80 percent of summer.

There are no developmental concerns at all and one of the biggest in his grade. It just goes back to him being so much younger since soooo many are opting to redshirt. I wouldn’t even consider it but some of these kids will be turning 7 before he turns 6. If this is common in your area, how do teachers handle this? At this moment, we are planning to go on time, but I’m concerned that my kid won’t even have a shot keeping up with kids academically.

I know many parents opt to red shirt so their kids are able to keep up socially but he already has a number of friends if he goes on time. If we held him back he wouldn’t know many of the kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would NOT hold a May birthday child back unless there are significant cognitive issues at play. I have a June child who I did not hold back. She is one of the youngest in her class. She has always been in the top reading/math groups though. Plus, socially, there were plenty of other kids with late spring/summer birthdays. I child with a May birthday will turn 7 in K. There will be an almost 2 year age difference between your child and a child with a late summer birthday who goes on time. That's just to big a spread IMHO.

I guess that’s my point. MOST are redshirting so if we go on time as I have planned for him to do, there will be a 2 year spread between municipal son and husband peers with him being that much younger.

[Anonymous]

There should be a rule that you can't turn 7 in kindergarten. That is just crazy old. There are plenty of second graders who are 7!

[Anonymous]

Former fcps teacher. I’ve never heard of redshirting spring babies, unless there was a special ed need. Trust his preschool teacher.

[Anonymous]

Sorry some weird typos! “My son and his peers”

[Anonymous]

How is a kid with a May birthday going to be the "absolute youngest?" The deadline is September, he will be with kids who have June, July, and August birthdays. Send him on time, especially since there aren't any red flags.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We are in Nashville. It may be more common here. I would say most of May boy bdays will be redshirted. Maybe a little more than half of Feb-April and 80 percent of summer.

There are no developmental concerns at all and one of the biggest in his grade. It just goes back to him being so much younger since soooo many are opting to redshirt. I wouldn’t even consider it but some of these kids will be turning 7 before he turns 6. If this is common in your area, how do teachers handle this? At this moment, we are planning to go on time, but I’m concerned that my kid won’t even have a shot keeping up with kids academically.

I know many parents opt to red shirt so their kids are able to keep up socially but he already has a number of friends if he goes on time. If we held him back he wouldn’t know many of the kids.

What’s the cutoff date in your school district for starting kindergarten?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, Op, it would be ridiculous to hold back a May birthday for no reason.

+1. Default redshirting is just so absurd!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My May birthday DS is a rising Freshman this year and I wish Every Single Day that I had not sent him to kindergarten on time. He was socially and academically ready for Kindergarten, but now that he is the youngest of his rising Freshman class and since he hasn't started puberty (so looks more like a rising 8th grader), I regret sending him on time.

I don't pay attention to the DCUM redshirt-haters and wouldn't base my decision on an anonymous board, but would look at the demographics of your actual school.

Almost anyone will tell you that you never regret waiting.

My June birthday DS was sent on time and started puberty early, so as a rising 8th grader he looks like a rising 10th/11th grader. If we’d help him back, he would have been WAY ahead of his peers puberty-wise. So no regrets sending him on time for that particular reason! He’s also doing well socially (he has happily found his brainy nerd-people group) and I can’t imagine him stagnating a year behind.

Son #2, May birthday, also sent on time and also doing well. And one of the tallest in his class despite having height-challenged parents.

[Anonymous]

I get it, OP. I have family in Tennessee and they redshirted their kids. It's funny how DC is 2 years apart from his cousin but only one grade apart.

I can see both sides. I don't think holding him back would be wrong but I also think sending him on time would be fine. Follow your instincts. And listen to the preschool teacher.

[Anonymous]

Hold him back, here is why:
1. Because something does not feel to you quite right to send him on time.
2. Because you always followed your gut and when you did you never rerated.
3. Because you are giving him one extra year of childhood when the childhood that used to be much longer and happier for the past generations, and now kids are tied up to the desk from early on.
4. Because K is not a play based anymore, like it used to be few years back. Now it is all academic, stress and a kid is being evaluated all the time by everyone and all goes on record.
5. Because he will have a whole life ahead of him to chop chop chop and one year does not make difference whatsoever ont he grand scale of things.. what difference it make if he graduates one year earlier, works one year longer, retires one year earlier?... honestly ask your own parents.. grandparents.. think about it.
6. Because for him now one year it is one fifth of his existence, of his age.. it is one fifth of his life, it is a lot to give or take away from childhood. If you compare it to later life, it is like you added or take away 12 years from the 60 year old.
7. Because he can learn so much in one year now and he can be so much better prepared for the first grade and do so much better.
8. Because he will have one year to emotionally and physically mature and be on the same level then the strongest kids in the class.
9. And by the flip, if you send him now he will be on the youngest end, least mature.
10. Because this will give him more confidence overall, not being the smallest kid in the classroom.

Sending a small young kid on time is like sending a kid before time and can have damaging long lasting effect and destroy all you were building now, the confidence and self esteem.

Many people redshirt kids simply to send them in time for their maturity. The kids mature at different rate and nobody knows better then you. NO teacher, nobody, but you do. You also have child's best interest in your mind, nobody else does to the same degree as you do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We are in Nashville. It may be more common here. I would say most of May boy bdays will be redshirted. Maybe a little more than half of Feb-April and 80 percent of summer.

There are no developmental concerns at all and one of the biggest in his grade. It just goes back to him being so much younger since soooo many are opting to redshirt. I wouldn’t even consider it but some of these kids will be turning 7 before he turns 6. If this is common in your area, how do teachers handle this? At this moment, we are planning to go on time, but I’m concerned that my kid won’t even have a shot keeping up with kids academically.

I know many parents opt to red shirt so their kids are able to keep up socially but he already has a number of friends if he goes on time. If we held him back he wouldn’t know many of the kids.

What’s the cutoff date in your school district for starting kindergarten?

SEP 1

[Anonymous]

OP, send him on time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hold him back, here is why:
1. Because something does not feel to you quite right to send him on time.
2. Because you always followed your gut and when you did you never rerated.
3. Because you are giving him one extra year of childhood when the childhood that used to be much longer and happier for the past generations, and now kids are tied up to the desk from early on.
4. Because K is not a play based anymore, like it used to be few years back. Now it is all academic, stress and a kid is being evaluated all the time by everyone and all goes on record.
5. Because he will have a whole life ahead of him to chop chop chop and one year does not make difference whatsoever ont he grand scale of things.. what difference it make if he graduates one year earlier, works one year longer, retires one year earlier?... honestly ask your own parents.. grandparents.. think about it.
6. Because for him now one year it is one fifth of his existence, of his age.. it is one fifth of his life, it is a lot to give or take away from childhood. If you compare it to later life, it is like you added or take away 12 years from the 60 year old.
7. Because he can learn so much in one year now and he can be so much better prepared for the first grade and do so much better.
8. Because he will have one year to emotionally and physically mature and be on the same level then the strongest kids in the class.
9. And by the flip, if you send him now he will be on the youngest end, least mature.
10. Because this will give him more confidence overall, not being the smallest kid in the classroom.

Sending a small young kid on time is like sending a kid before time and can have damaging long lasting effect and destroy all you were building now, the confidence and self esteem.

Many people redshirt kids simply to send them in time for their maturity. The kids mature at different rate and nobody knows better then you. NO teacher, nobody, but you do. You also have child's best interest in your mind, nobody else does to the same degree as you do.

I read OP's post the other way, that she wants to send her DC on time.

Redshirting kids simply for maturity is nonsense, IMO. Yes, children grow unevenly and some 5 year olds are more or less mature than others. They'll grow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Sending a small young kid on time is like sending a kid before time and can have damaging long lasting effect and destroy all you were building now, the confidence and self esteem.

Drama queen alert.

My bday is right at the cut off; late bloomer; and short. It made me tougher, not "destroy" my confidence and self esteem.