Anyone not medicate for ADHD and child grew out of it?
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Anonymous
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I have a fifth grader with friends with adhd. I see the difference with their personality/behavior when they are on meds vs not on meds. Their hyperness affects everyone in the class. It’s not fair to the other kids to have the teacher be focused on one student trying to control them.
Not to mention their personality changes. Off meds, they are not the most pleasant kids. It affects them socially. I am currently seeing it play out in real life. If you are still anti-medication, I pray to G-d you are not one of those parents who complain/don’t want too many lower income brown kids in their child’s school. |
Anonymous
| Personal experiences reported here are obviously all over the map. |
Anonymous
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I was the first poster to respond. Sorry for being snarky earlier. I am a scientist. The truth is that: 1. Not only are ADHD symptoms highly variable in aspect and severity, necessitating different approaches, but... 2. A certain number of patients have been misdiagnosed and don't actually have ADHD... 3. Just as a certain number of kids have ADHD and nobody has realized they have it. Hence the confusion over treatment, and whether one can outgrow ADHD. Some milder versions of ADHD can be handled without meds, when a patient matures and develops good study and management skills. Some people never had ADHD to begin with and thus "outgrow" it. My husband and I both have milder versions of ADHD. My job is relxed and flexible, so I don't medicate myself. My husband SHOULD medicate himself but claims he doesn't feel himself on meds, and as a result makes our lives more difficult than they should be (chronically late, misses important deadlines, clutters and hoards). One of our children is not functional at all without meds and may have to take them for the rest of his life. The other doesn't seem to have ADHD at all, thank goodness. Please consult a reputable pediatric psychiatrist, and take the teacher's input into account. The great thing with stimulants for ADHD is that you can try them for a while, and then stop cold if you decide they're not helpful. |
Anonymous
| DS wasn’t having difficulty academically and we did not want to try medication for many years despite meeting after meeting with teachers over behavior. We finally did when he was 11 after he requested that we please do something to help him because he always felt out of control. We tried counseling first and of course met with doctors. Lose dose meds made a huge difference in his life. He never struggled with academics but it helped him manage his behavior and navigate social situations. He could finally focus to use some of the strategies he learned in counseling. Most importantly, he didn’t want to argue with everyone all of the time. I never thought we would medicate. I was really against it. |
Anonymous
| Somewhere between 30-60% of children outgrow ADHD as adults, depending on the study. Whether that means they matured enough to cross the line from just this side to that side or that means that they really, truly outgrew ADHD entirely, is not clear and subject to debate. My personal opinion, based on friends and family members, is that it's a little of both. Some kids really do outgrow it and other kids mature enough that it's manageable as an adult. |
Anonymous
| Unfortunately many with ADHD who are not put on meds ultimately self medicate. |
Anonymous
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I was never medicated. I mostly outgrew the hyperactive stuff (my coworkers would tell you I still talk compulsively sometimes...maybe most times?) but I still have ADHd clearly. I manage okay with a lot of self-designed supports and a fairly flexible job and an organized spouse.
What I would watch for closely are signs that your child’s social interactions are being impaired. A lot of kids develop depression in the ore-teen years because irritating or odd behavior that was tolerated by younger kids is not tolerated by other teens and they start to feel like an outcast. I’d worry about that more than the academics. |
Anonymous
this is true and it is really scary. 
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Anonymous
| My parents waited too long to medicate me (I’m female and didn’t have the hyper part so mostly just came off as a daydreamer/spacy)—-until my self-esteem has been destroyed by having to work 3x as hard as other kids and still being disorganized/constantly forgetting things, not being able to make or keep friends etc. They finally agreed to try a low dose of medication after my first suicide attempt at age 14. People make all kinds of weird value-judgements about how you should avoid medicating at all costs but I think often times people wait until a kid who’s been working extra hard to compensate completely falls apart, which is a huge disservice to a kid. If meds don’t help your kid or your kid doesn’t like how they feel on them that’s one thing but to not even try to help your kid see if this tool can help them is wrong. |
Anonymous
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17 in HS, and still medicated. Definitely an adHd kid, started meds on a very low dose and slowly went up until it made a difference. Last year switched meds because DC articulated with dr what DC didn't like about the meds. Tried new med, again very low dose, slowly increased - doc says most my DCs age/height/weight are on much higher doses, but doc is conservative and it is working for DC at what I think he said is two-thirds the level others take.
If DC went off meds, life would be a hot mess. Now it would be unorganized, not turning in completed work, and not pleasant to be around. I could see this leading to tough times at work, in relationships, etc. as DC gets older, and would not recommend DC go off meds |
Anonymous
I was given a similar analogy by psychiatrist. "If your child had diabetes, wouldn't you give them insulin." At the time I felt like medication was being heavily pushed on my DS. I think it is much more nuanced then many psychiatrists/doctors present it as. My son has been on and off of medication, there are certainly significant drawbacks to medication (sleep, increased anxiety, loss of appetite etc). He is now 18 and has decided on his own to take a low dose of Concerta. I am hopeful this is not forever though. |
Anonymous
Yes, yes, yes!!!! Thank you, Scientist PP! Both my husband and I also have ADHD. Arguably my husband's is mild-- mine is not. Anything I say would just be rehashing this excellent comment, so I won't. Everybody read it, please. Also: you don't have to be on meds forever. I was diagnosed as an adult (though it was extremely obvious in childhood, in retrospect, just primarily inattentive, and in a "smart" girl, so no one diagnosed it then). I took meds for a number of years as I learned coping mechanisms, and then went off when I was capable enough. It would still be easier to be on meds (and I felt "myself" on them just fine), but I can manage fairly well without them now. That's pretty typical. |
Anonymous
| Growing out of a neurological disorder is news to me. Perhaps, what you mean is, are the impacts of the side effects less noticeable as the kid gets older? If that's the case, then yes, a kid can learn to adapt without medication and with the help of therapies be better capable of managing themselves. It doesn't work for every ADHD child. In K the school principal told me in DS's IEP meeting that he firmly believed that DS (diagnosed with ADHD-combined) would never be a success without medication. By the end of K, DS was on grade level in all areas, except one, where he was advanced. DS is in 5 grade and most people that interact with him don't know that he has ADHD. He is not on medication. We chose to change his diet and his environment, and add all the therapies that he needed to be a success. He's on grade level in all areas. In the future, if DS decides that life and school has gotten to hard to manage because of ADHD, then we will revisit putting him on medication. |
Anonymous
| What therapies or coping strategies worked for you? |
Anonymous
| I think you should take your head out of the sand, figure out what your kid needs at this point in time, and make that he gets it. As opposed to wishing and dreaming that something that makes you uncomfortable will somehow go away with time. |