On vacation with 15 year old DC and it’s miserable !!

[Anonymous]

Vacations are family time in otherwise very busy lives. Once we get whoever we are going, no electronics. Books, board games, family movies, etc. but no electronics. Kids and (to the greatest extent possible) parents.

Everyone gets to choose one activity. And has to be pleasant during everyone else’s choice.

But mostly 1.

[Anonymous]

My teens would lock themselves in their rooms at the beach and not come out at all. We’ve recently tried to set some reasonable parameters.

1. Come out for dinner.
2. Spend one hour a day on the beach (or otherwise out) with us.

My 14 year old thinks this is reasonable. My 16 year old not so much but she goes along. I always try to pick my battles. I want to enjoy my vacation and can’t if my kids are being dragged along and complaining. I honestly think the miserable teen is worse than the whining toddler and preschooler who could be distracted with a fun activity or special treat. I’m trying to focus on the positive side. DH and I often feel like we’re on a kid-free vacation. We can lounge on the beach all day without interruption if we want. Would I prefer fun quality time with my kids? You bet! Is there any way to get them on board? Nope.

[Anonymous]

Wow! Single Mom here....we pick mainly active vacations and DS helps with the planning. We are too active most of the vacation to spend much time on electronics and my teen is a trooper.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:On vacation with my 15 YO now as well, and the phone has been taken away. We did not pay this $$ and go to this trouble to travel for him to spend the entire time on phone. He can have it back when we return to Washington. Maybe.

I was just going to suggest this. Take it away during the day. At minimum, he can have it back at night if he's not been a pia during the day.

[Anonymous]

Plan something really photogenic, so they can post selfies and make all their friends jealous!

[Anonymous]

Family vacation is just a big ole oxymoron!! We brought a friend this time and it helped but I've never felt so uncool since my 7th grade awkward period!! 16 year old girls are just .... well 16 year old girls! Sigh. Can't wait for a girls trip with my friends!!

[Anonymous]

It sounds like you have paid for WAY too many vacations. This entitlement s not becoming. I would take a vacation break and not say a word until they ask. When someone finally notices tell them vacation is no fun anymore and you have opted to treat yourself and DH to something special (golf lessons/spa treatments/plastic surgery/new car). Sorry to be blunt, but your kid needs a job.

[Anonymous]

Somewhere in my parents' home is a VHS tape that will have evidence of me being a complete sullen brat in Paris. My parents ignored me as to not ruin the trip for everyone else, but I cringe at the memory of my behavior. This was before cell phones. I was just a miserable, moody teen for a year or two. If I ever find the tape, I'm burning it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Somewhere in my parents' home is a VHS tape that will have evidence of me being a complete sullen brat in Paris. My parents ignored me as to not ruin the trip for everyone else, but I cringe at the memory of my behavior. This was before cell phones. I was just a miserable, moody teen for a year or two. If I ever find the tape, I'm burning it.

Haha! You’ve given me hope.

[Anonymous]

To avoid this we say that there will be free time from say 2:00 - 4:00 and they can do whatever they want then. No phones for any of us except for this time period. The carrot seems to keep them from being moody during other activities and many times by the time 2:00 rolls around they are so into something they don't even remember.

[Anonymous]

My kids are no angels. They are moody and often annoyed by me and their dad. I think most of you would recognize their behaviors as “classic teen” with a large splash of entitlement. I will say though, that the only time we never have problems with them is when we are on vacation. They are so delightful on trips that we probably spend too much on vacations. Only thing I can think of is that we really involve them in all the planning. It seems to bring out the best in them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does anyone else feel like electronics are ruining our lives?

+1

Yes. There is so much research showing how detrimental it is emotionally, mentally, and intellectually, and encourages depression and anxiety. Why don't parents have the guts to take them away?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:On vacation with my 15 YO now as well, and the phone has been taken away. We did not pay this $$ and go to this trouble to travel for him to spend the entire time on phone. He can have it back when we return to Washington. Maybe.

Right... and you paid all that $$ and went to that trouble so you could read and post on DCUM...

[Anonymous]

Take. The. Phone. Away.

[Anonymous]

Why don’t you take the phone away for the duration of the trip?