I just don't know what to do anymore....

[Anonymous]

I second (or third) to try Dominion, they helped me with secondary infertility. They were more aggressive and hopeful from the first appointment than my RE in Richmond, VA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I second (or third) to try Dominion, they helped me with secondary infertility. They were more aggressive and hopeful from the first appointment than my RE in Richmond, VA.

Did you have success with Dominion?

[Anonymous]

I definitely wouldn't give up without getting other opinions. The PP about getting other consults is a good one. Many will do phone consults - you send your records in advance (so request them now - I suggest planning to go get a hard copy yourself b/c otherwise it takes forever and sometimes doesn't happen). Some REs charge for the hour of time ($600-700), but it's a great way to get other opinions. Some people get a boost in #s of eggs with back to back IVF cycles and different protocols can make significant differences.

Also consider what you'd be up for - if you have a tougher issue (e.g., DOR and/or 40+) it can be much harder. I did 8 OE cycles at 2 REs and then DE out of state before success. My point with that is not to give up on OE right away, but only that no one will be able to guarantee success or tell you what's right for you, so you do need to have your own plan in mind.

[Anonymous]

If you're getting one egg with ivf then I'd probably not spend thousands of dollars on that when you presumably get a free egg each month anyway. Assuming no male factor I'd honestly just save your money and try on your own each and every month with opk and the whole works. Maybe could try timed intercourse with clomid to see if maybe you can get more than one follicle but unsure if that would work since your iui was already with injectables. Dominion might offer ncivf to help any fertilization factors in play. At 35, you have decent odds of producing a good egg at some point though it probably won't be as soon as you'd prefer.

[Anonymous]

Move to DE. I did frozen for no 2.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Move to DE. I did frozen for no 2.

you did frozen... DE?

[Anonymous]

Maybe get a consult for natural cycle IVF. You may still need the IVF part but maybe the meds aren't making a difference and you might do better quality wise without the meds and banking and storing a few natural cycle IVFs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:New RE at a new clinic, as soon as you are ready to do so. If your financial/insurance situation allows it, consider having consults with more than 1 and picking the one you're most comfortable/confident with. We received what turned out to be really bad advice from our first RE last year at this time. We followed the advice for 3 months because she was the RE we were established with, I honestly wasn't quite sure what else to do, and was overwhelmed by the thought of going somewhere else to "start over" because what if it turned out to be worse than our experience at the first place. It took a huge toll on my mental health.
Then one of my oldest friends, who has dealt with plenty of her own health problems but not infertility, said to me, "You aren't starting over from scratch. You have pages and pages of records from the first doctor to guide a new doctor's approach." For me that was the first step in the right direction in turning my thinking and outlook around. It gave me the confidence to book appointments at 2 other clinics quickly, and I was specifically able to see REs I had read an extensive number of reviews on (mostly comments here on DCUM). One was a good fit; the other was not. We promptly began moving forward with the good fit and everything fell into place. The way my second clinic did things made for a much more logical and comfortable environment for me, which meant I felt better taken care of and more confident as the process proceeded.
Good luck.

Thank you this is really helpful. May I ask what ended up happening in the 2nd clinic? Were you successful?

I'm the pp of the quoted thread. Since others have brought up specific clinics, I'll mention that my bad experience was at GW, and I switched to Dr. Gordon at Dominion. My diagnosis was RPL--we kept conceiving but never stayed pregnant. The GW RE ran some tests for RPL, told us to keep trying naturally, and left it at that. I expected and assumed she would provide more guidance on next steps once the testing was done-after all, that was her job. I even asked about scheduling a follow-up to discuss the results upon completion of testing, but she said that wouldn't be necessary because she could message me the results. The RPL testing took 2 months after my last miscarriage to complete. The message she sent said, "Your latest test results are normal. I hope you are well." There were some other things about how she handled my case that also majorly factored in, but telling us to just keep trying on our own without changing anything, and then leaving us without a plan were the final pieces that made it clear we needed to leave GW...however, as I said above, I kind of got stuck on the idea of starting over until my friend's encouragement came along.

Before going to Dominion, I did get second opinions from specialists on underlying medical conditions that the GW RE was aware of but didn't seem to factor in to the overall equation of my case. I also saw an MFM for an RPL prenatal conversation.

At Dominion, Dr. G was willing to work with the recommendations the other specialists made, and he outlined all the ART options he would support us in trying. And yes, we were very lucky to have been successful there. We did an IUI and were pregnant 8 weeks after our first consult with him.

[Anonymous]

Consider sending your records to Dr. Owen Davis at Cornell in New York, and have either a phone or in person consult. I'm so sorry you are facing this. To have so much at stake, and so much in limbo, is awful. Sending you a huge hug!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Consider sending your records to Dr. Owen Davis at Cornell in New York, and have either a phone or in person consult. I'm so sorry you are facing this. To have so much at stake, and so much in limbo, is awful. Sending you a huge hug!

This.

Also, beware, Dominion does marketing on this board.

Change REs, 1 bad IVF is far from "I just don't know what to do anymore". What lead you to believe you'll have success on the 1st try? Not to be harsh or anything, but you need to be realistic, it may take multiple treatments. Or even DE.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Move to DE. I did frozen for no 2.

you did frozen... DE?

NP. Yes, I used frozen DE. DS was frozen twice. Once as an egg, once as an embryo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How important is it to you and your partner to have a child via your own pregnancy, compared to adoption? We went through secondary infertility with stats in our favor, but just got to the point where we realized we wanted another child, not another pregnancy. We were fortunate to be able to adopt our wonderful DD who completes our family. Whatever you choose, though, OP, I wish you peace.

Thanks, I have definitely thought about this but after some research it seems like adoption is just as complicated/expensive/emotionally fraught as treatments. There's also no clock on adoptions (well, not as much as OE IVF). But definitely in our thoughts as well.

I’d find a new clinic. But I’d also start exploring Donor Egg (more expensive) and Embryo Donation (usually the cost of FET and lawyer’s fee).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Consider sending your records to Dr. Owen Davis at Cornell in New York, and have either a phone or in person consult. I'm so sorry you are facing this. To have so much at stake, and so much in limbo, is awful. Sending you a huge hug!

This.

Also, beware, Dominion does marketing on this board.

Change REs, 1 bad IVF is far from "I just don't know what to do anymore". What lead you to believe you'll have success on the 1st try? Not to be harsh or anything, but you need to be realistic, it may take multiple treatments. Or even DE.

Less the 1 bad IVF than the RE not thinking I have much of a shot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Consider sending your records to Dr. Owen Davis at Cornell in New York, and have either a phone or in person consult. I'm so sorry you are facing this. To have so much at stake, and so much in limbo, is awful. Sending you a huge hug!

This.

Also, beware, Dominion does marketing on this board.

Change REs, 1 bad IVF is far from "I just don't know what to do anymore". What lead you to believe you'll have success on the 1st try? Not to be harsh or anything, but you need to be realistic, it may take multiple treatments. Or even DE.

Does Dominion really do that? That should be banned.