Request DC metro records?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another thing: The fact that the father is seeking "metro records" indicates that he is not a respectful co-parent. If this is indicative of his general approach to co-parenting, he should not have the bulk of custody. He needs to put his child's interests first, including respecting her likely very strong bond with her mother.

OP here. I am seeking records because my ex is lying about her work. She has always told me that she is not capable of leaving work early, that's why she had never driven or picked my son up from day care. I have literally made my son breakfast, dinner, put to bed, waken up, gotten everything ready for daycare etc. For 4 years she has been saying she can't, despite the fact that it has caused me to work at night time after I put him to sleep. She is telling the judge this is not true. After the judge saw my daycare records where my ex has literally never picked up or dropped off my son, we are asking for metro records. If she gets a baby sitter, how is that better than her spending time with his father. I'm more than happy to give up time if my wife will actually spend the time with him. I don't get how she can suddenly do it not, when she never could before. Her words, not mine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. Not "bye Felicia." The parental bond will be assessed. The mom with the tough commute can have a babysitter and her bond with the child will be respected by the court and evaluators. The dad is not in a position to "give" or not. If the mom is seeking at least 50% and there is a bond with her child, the commute is not going to affect it. There is a lot of men's rights / red pill nonsense on DCUM, but the fact is that women are NOT treated fairly in current family law frameworks. Their need to work is used against them in ways that would never happen with the father.

Say what??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another thing: The fact that the father is seeking "metro records" indicates that he is not a respectful co-parent. If this is indicative of his general approach to co-parenting, he should not have the bulk of custody. He needs to put his child's interests first, including respecting her likely very strong bond with her mother.

OP here. I am seeking records because my ex is lying about her work. She has always told me that she is not capable of leaving work early, that's why she had never driven or picked my son up from day care. I have literally made my son breakfast, dinner, put to bed, waken up, gotten everything ready for daycare etc. For 4 years she has been saying she can't, despite the fact that it has caused me to work at night time after I put him to sleep. She is telling the judge this is not true. After the judge saw my daycare records where my ex has literally never picked up or dropped off my son, we are asking for metro records. If she gets a baby sitter, how is that better than her spending time with his father. I'm more than happy to give up time if my wife will actually spend the time with him. I don't get how she can suddenly do it not, when she never could before. Her words, not mine.

I don't get the metro records. Give her two days a week where she has to pick him up and drop him off and see how she does. Problem solved. Give her the chance to fail or succeed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another thing: The fact that the father is seeking "metro records" indicates that he is not a respectful co-parent. If this is indicative of his general approach to co-parenting, he should not have the bulk of custody. He needs to put his child's interests first, including respecting her likely very strong bond with her mother.

OP here. I am seeking records because my ex is lying about her work. She has always told me that she is not capable of leaving work early, that's why she had never driven or picked my son up from day care. I have literally made my son breakfast, dinner, put to bed, waken up, gotten everything ready for daycare etc. For 4 years she has been saying she can't, despite the fact that it has caused me to work at night time after I put him to sleep. She is telling the judge this is not true. After the judge saw my daycare records where my ex has literally never picked up or dropped off my son, we are asking for metro records. If she gets a baby sitter, how is that better than her spending time with his father. I'm more than happy to give up time if my wife will actually spend the time with him. I don't get how she can suddenly do it not, when she never could before. Her words, not mine.

Not that it matters, but you started off telling us this was a daughter, now it's a son...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another thing: The fact that the father is seeking "metro records" indicates that he is not a respectful co-parent. If this is indicative of his general approach to co-parenting, he should not have the bulk of custody. He needs to put his child's interests first, including respecting her likely very strong bond with her mother.

OP here. I am seeking records because my ex is lying about her work. She has always told me that she is not capable of leaving work early, that's why she had never driven or picked my son up from day care. I have literally made my son breakfast, dinner, put to bed, waken up, gotten everything ready for daycare etc. For 4 years she has been saying she can't, despite the fact that it has caused me to work at night time after I put him to sleep. She is telling the judge this is not true. After the judge saw my daycare records where my ex has literally never picked up or dropped off my son, we are asking for metro records. If she gets a baby sitter, how is that better than her spending time with his father. I'm more than happy to give up time if my wife will actually spend the time with him. I don't get how she can suddenly do it not, when she never could before. Her words, not mine.

Not that it matters, but you started off telling us this was a daughter, now it's a son...

I think it matters - something isn't legit in this post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another thing: The fact that the father is seeking "metro records" indicates that he is not a respectful co-parent. If this is indicative of his general approach to co-parenting, he should not have the bulk of custody. He needs to put his child's interests first, including respecting her likely very strong bond with her mother.

OP here. I am seeking records because my ex is lying about her work. She has always told me that she is not capable of leaving work early, that's why she had never driven or picked my son up from day care. I have literally made my son breakfast, dinner, put to bed, waken up, gotten everything ready for daycare etc. For 4 years she has been saying she can't, despite the fact that it has caused me to work at night time after I put him to sleep. She is telling the judge this is not true. After the judge saw my daycare records where my ex has literally never picked up or dropped off my son, we are asking for metro records. If she gets a baby sitter, how is that better than her spending time with his father. I'm more than happy to give up time if my wife will actually spend the time with him. I don't get how she can suddenly do it not, when she never could before. Her words, not mine.

Not that it matters, but you started off telling us this was a daughter, now it's a son...

I think it matters - something isn't legit in this post.

OP is a woman who is complaining about stbxh and their child is a son.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If she works 12 hours a day, she isn't really doing much mothering, is she? I wouldn't give her 50/50, OP.

Is that because she is required to, or because she wants, with or without unspoken pressure...as in someone trying to become a partner in a law firm?

[Anonymous]

When you start divorcing, suddenly all of these things the other parent said aren't possible are actually possible,

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When you start divorcing, suddenly all of these things the other parent said aren't possible are actually possible,

I am this pp. I had a lot more to say about this, but had to run. OP, I understand that you feel like you deserve custody. It's fine if the judge ordered the records be turned over. However, it does not matter. There are a lot of things people do in a marriage that when faced with all the alternatives, they won't do outside the marriage. If your wife can support 50/50 custody, let her have it.

My husband told me he couldn't do a lot of things related to our family until I left him. He was incapable of taking any time off. He was incapable of being home at a reasonable hour. He was incapable of leaving the house with DD before 3pm on weekends, so that I could work. He was incapable of getting ready for work while caring for DD. He was incapable of a lot of things until I left. And when I left, all of a sudden, he was capable of it all. I could scream. I have screamed about it.

It meant that he was being an ass to me. But you've got a lifetime dealing with this woman. And fighting about custody is not the way to go about it for the sake of your son. Use custody to negotiate for something you do want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When you start divorcing, suddenly all of these things the other parent said aren't possible are actually possible,

I am this pp. I had a lot more to say about this, but had to run. OP, I understand that you feel like you deserve custody. It's fine if the judge ordered the records be turned over. However, it does not matter. There are a lot of things people do in a marriage that when faced with all the alternatives, they won't do outside the marriage. If your wife can support 50/50 custody, let her have it.

My husband told me he couldn't do a lot of things related to our family until I left him. He was incapable of taking any time off. He was incapable of being home at a reasonable hour. He was incapable of leaving the house with DD before 3pm on weekends, so that I could work. He was incapable of getting ready for work while caring for DD. He was incapable of a lot of things until I left. And when I left, all of a sudden, he was capable of it all. I could scream. I have screamed about it.

It meant that he was being an ass to me. But you've got a lifetime dealing with this woman. And fighting about custody is not the way to go about it for the sake of your son. Use custody to negotiate for something you do want.

Something *else* you want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another thing: The fact that the father is seeking "metro records" indicates that he is not a respectful co-parent. If this is indicative of his general approach to co-parenting, he should not have the bulk of custody. He needs to put his child's interests first, including respecting her likely very strong bond with her mother.

OP here. I am seeking records because my ex is lying about her work. She has always told me that she is not capable of leaving work early, that's why she had never driven or picked my son up from day care. I have literally made my son breakfast, dinner, put to bed, waken up, gotten everything ready for daycare etc. For 4 years she has been saying she can't, despite the fact that it has caused me to work at night time after I put him to sleep. She is telling the judge this is not true. After the judge saw my daycare records where my ex has literally never picked up or dropped off my son, we are asking for metro records. If she gets a baby sitter, how is that better than her spending time with his father. I'm more than happy to give up time if my wife will actually spend the time with him. I don't get how she can suddenly do it not, when she never could before. Her words, not mine.

Not that it matters, but you started off telling us this was a daughter, now it's a son...

I think it matters - something isn't legit in this post.

OP is a woman who is complaining about stbxh and their child is a son.

No - OP is clearly the father - who somehow started out with a daughter but now has a son (initial post below);

My soon to be ex wife and I are currently in a custody dispute. My daughter is 4 years old and I have picked her up and taken her to day care every day the last 4 years. My ex works nearly 10-12 hours a day in DC. She leaves at 6 and comes home around 7 (metro commute is close to an hour).

[Anonymous]

Give your wife 50/50 if she wants it. Don’t spend your daughter’s college money fighting to prevent her own mother from having time with her unless you have a DAMN good reason. Working late in your marriage ain’t it.

If she can’t schedule her time to make it work then it will show up very quickly and you can act then.

Listen to the posters above — she will very possibly do things for your child that she wouldn’t do in your marriage.