Middle school boys and sports

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Yes, there are rec options for some sports, but many kids have moved on to travel/select so you are left with teams consisting of boys who have never played together and don’t know each other which makes it a lot less fun/successful. It’s great if you have a group of friends who decide to stick with rec, but I don’t think that’s the case for most kids. And baseball pp, I’m with you. It’s completely nuts in this area.

They "don't now each other" for all of a few weeks.

Soccer: Isn't there Suburban Friendship League? It isn't neighborhood based, but your kid is growing up and "neighborhood" stuff just doesn't happen so much.

Travel Soccer: at least in Arlington, there are too many travel teams and probably a spot for almost anyone willing to pay the money.

[Anonymous]

my son's middle school has no cut teams

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think the push-back you're getting is because there *are* options. You just don't like the options. I'm not sure what's wrong with rec teams being made up of kids from different schools (travel teams are too.) And frankly, if you wanted to play on a travel team - at least for soccer - there are so many around that you can almost certainly find one if your kid is even an average player.

It sounds like you want a team that plays multiple times a week and stays together from season to season, but doesn't cost a lot and doesn't require a commitment. That's a unicorn anywhere.

+1

Quite frankly, there are tons of options in this area. Rec leagues for a whole assortment of different sports. Classes through the local park authorities or gyms or clubs or studios or so on. And all of these things continue through high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just a vent to say how hard it is to live in this area and have a kid who loves sports, but who isn’t good enough to make select/travel/high school teams. Seems like there are so few opportunities to keep playing team sports once they hit middle school if they are not on these elite teams. I know we can explore non-team sports (and we will), but it’s really a hit on self-esteem. Any wisdom from parents who have hit this point with their kids is welcome.

+1

OP, I have heard this complaint before. It makes sense but parents who aren't in that situation, or parents' of DC who are not athletic, are not sympathetic. It is hard to be with players who do not take it seriously, but who are not dedicated to travel for whatever legitimate reason. There are players in the middle, and that middle has an enormous range. When your DC is put with an enormous range of players, the team can not be successful. The team can exist, but that's about it. I hear you.

[Anonymous]

I hear you OP. My DS didn't make Select baseball so it's another year of Rec, which is fine although it's been a different team each year (teams have disbanded, coaches have stopped, etc.) and I agree that the kids don't really get to know each other with one practice and one game a week.

[Anonymous]

It's not the lack of rec options. It's the whole system that starts sorting kids into rec and select/travel at an early age instead of letting kids play with their schools or neighborhoods.

It isn't all roses in travel either. The kids on DC's team come from 7 schools. DC doesn't mind that but if had the option of playing on a school team instead I know he'd take that in a heartbeat.

[Anonymous]

My son plays a travel sport nearly year round. He also plays for his schools tennis team. It is no cut. There are 3 levels of play. Tennis is a great lifetime sport. Though I love watching the advance level of play for his travel sport, tennis is the most practical and relevant. We also have introduced him to golf and go to a few local ski areas in the summer for downhill mountain biking. He will so the mountain biking camp this summer. I can tell you mountain biking is no joke. It is very technical, and very strenuous. All your kid needs is a parent en shape enough to take him out the first few times and to definitely get him lessins.

Also we have friends whose kids is on the ski team for another local (less than 2hrs drive) ski area.

[Anonymous]

My kid plays hockey on a rec team and an intramural middle school team. It's true that he often only knows a handful of kids on either team and they don't practice intensely. But, that's sort of the point of rec teams. He is a middle level player without the drive to do travel (for which I am grateful because it's nuts). He has fun, gets to know other kids, gets the benefits of team play and sports, and it is a manageable activity. I don't know what you're looking for but rec teams tick a lot of the boxes for us.

[Anonymous]

My kid (7th) plays on a rec team and has for the past 5 years (as have 90% of his team mates - so they have been together.) My kid has made friends (not 'hang out every weekend' friends, but invite to a birthday party, play Fortnite together out side of practice.) He enjoys it and it helps keep him fit (2 90m practices/week + games on the weekend.)

Summer swim is where my kid found his friends (they are all from the neighborhood and while they all don't go to the same school many do so he sees them year round.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think the push-back you're getting is because there *are* options. You just don't like the options. I'm not sure what's wrong with rec teams being made up of kids from different schools (travel teams are too.) And frankly, if you wanted to play on a travel team - at least for soccer - there are so many around that you can almost certainly find one if your kid is even an average player.

It sounds like you want a team that plays multiple times a week and stays together from season to season, but doesn't cost a lot and doesn't require a commitment. That's a unicorn anywhere.

Has your kid played on one of these teams? Because my DD has. She could be on a travel team (prob not an A team). But, for a variety of reasons, that does not work for us. So her "rec" teams are always cobbled together affairs, which mostly kids trying out the sport for the first time. And that's totally fine. That's rec. But, the teams end losing all the tournaments and stuff and it's not fun. She's not the top of the sport, and she's not the bottom. She's a solid player and it's not fun.

So, while you're right that there "*are* options", those options are not always good ones. That is what OP is talking about. And I agree. There is no in between. I guess that's life. But, as one of the other posters said, it didn't used to be this way. And in this case, the "old way" seems to be something I prefer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son plays a travel sport nearly year round. He also plays for his schools tennis team. It is no cut. There are 3 levels of play. Tennis is a great lifetime sport. Though I love watching the advance level of play for his travel sport, tennis is the most practical and relevant. We also have introduced him to golf and go to a few local ski areas in the summer for downhill mountain biking. He will so the mountain biking camp this summer. I can tell you mountain biking is no joke. It is very technical, and very strenuous. All your kid needs is a parent en shape enough to take him out the first few times and to definitely get him lessins.

Also we have friends whose kids is on the ski team for another local (less than 2hrs drive) ski area.

Really? I didn't know this was an option here. What is the team/resort?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the push-back you're getting is because there *are* options. You just don't like the options. I'm not sure what's wrong with rec teams being made up of kids from different schools (travel teams are too.) And frankly, if you wanted to play on a travel team - at least for soccer - there are so many around that you can almost certainly find one if your kid is even an average player.

It sounds like you want a team that plays multiple times a week and stays together from season to season, but doesn't cost a lot and doesn't require a commitment. That's a unicorn anywhere.

Has your kid played on one of these teams? Because my DD has. She could be on a travel team (prob not an A team). But, for a variety of reasons, that does not work for us. So her "rec" teams are always cobbled together affairs, which mostly kids trying out the sport for the first time. And that's totally fine. That's rec. But, the teams end losing all the tournaments and stuff and it's not fun. She's not the top of the sport, and she's not the bottom. She's a solid player and it's not fun.

So, while you're right that there "*are* options", those options are not always good ones. That is what OP is talking about. And I agree. There is no in between. I guess that's life. But, as one of the other posters said, it didn't used to be this way. And in this case, the "old way" seems to be something I prefer.

This is OP. Thanks, PP. That’s exactly where we are for this particular sport. I’m not criticizing rec teams - they are great for some sports and some kids (including mine for some sports). But when you have a kid who has strong skills and a good sense of the game, rec really is not always the right fit unless it’s with a group of good friends who have played together for a while as some posters have mentioned. Select is really the perfect in-between for kids like mine, but those teams are few and far between as kids get older, perhaps with the exception of soccer which seems to have more options.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the push-back you're getting is because there *are* options. You just don't like the options. I'm not sure what's wrong with rec teams being made up of kids from different schools (travel teams are too.) And frankly, if you wanted to play on a travel team - at least for soccer - there are so many around that you can almost certainly find one if your kid is even an average player.

It sounds like you want a team that plays multiple times a week and stays together from season to season, but doesn't cost a lot and doesn't require a commitment. That's a unicorn anywhere.

Has your kid played on one of these teams? Because my DD has. She could be on a travel team (prob not an A team). But, for a variety of reasons, that does not work for us. So her "rec" teams are always cobbled together affairs, which mostly kids trying out the sport for the first time. And that's totally fine. That's rec. But, the teams end losing all the tournaments and stuff and it's not fun. She's not the top of the sport, and she's not the bottom. She's a solid player and it's not fun.

So, while you're right that there "*are* options", those options are not always good ones. That is what OP is talking about. And I agree. There is no in between. I guess that's life. But, as one of the other posters said, it didn't used to be this way. And in this case, the "old way" seems to be something I prefer.

This is OP. Thanks, PP. That’s exactly where we are for this particular sport. I’m not criticizing rec teams - they are great for some sports and some kids (including mine for some sports). But when you have a kid who has strong skills and a good sense of the game, rec really is not always the right fit unless it’s with a group of good friends who have played together for a while as some posters have mentioned. Select is really the perfect in-between for kids like mine, but those teams are few and far between as kids get older, perhaps with the exception of soccer which seems to have more options.

So (assuming you mean rec soccer) take a look at the teams' records on the SFL website. Request the coach that seems to have a good winning record. Our SFL team can probably hang with most club's C teams (or maybe even B, depending on the club). Problem solved.

[Anonymous]

Recent article in this s subject:


https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2018/11/income-inequality-explains-decline-youth-sports/574975/

Too much money in kids’ sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son plays a travel sport nearly year round. He also plays for his schools tennis team. It is no cut. There are 3 levels of play. Tennis is a great lifetime sport. Though I love watching the advance level of play for his travel sport, tennis is the most practical and relevant. We also have introduced him to golf and go to a few local ski areas in the summer for downhill mountain biking. He will so the mountain biking camp this summer. I can tell you mountain biking is no joke. It is very technical, and very strenuous. All your kid needs is a parent en shape enough to take him out the first few times and to definitely get him lessins.

Also we have friends whose kids is on the ski team for another local (less than 2hrs drive) ski area.

Really? I didn't know this was an option here. What is the team/resort?

Not PP but Liberty, Whitetail, and Roundtop all host ski race teams.

My DC has been on a team for several years and has a blast.