Let's get real about IVF

[Anonymous]

14:44 here. For the OP, we were not prepared to do IVF at any cost. We could afford a few cycles and so we ultimately went ahead. I also felt I could manage the physical and emotional side effects of the actual cycle. I ended up needing therapy for the latter (which is not uncommon), after we miscarried twins. We had a very specific diagnosis which made our treatment path clear and our docs thought we had an excellent chance of success. All of those things weighed strongly in favor of trying. But we ultimately had to come terms with the fact that there is a percentage of couples for whom this doesn't work -- those numbers are people, and we had to reckon for ourselves that we might be among them.

Best wishes to you in your journey. A good source of info and support is Resolve and the inciid forums.

[Anonymous]

OP here, thank you for your advice, I will check with Resolve.

[Anonymous]

9:42 here. op- i am sorry for reacting. the question just seemed to be one to elicit strong responses. i'm realizing through this board that ivf is pretty contraversial, and i think we who are going through art process are all probably very sensitive on the subject.... (or at least i am...)
best wishes.
resolve is a good website too.

[Anonymous]

I'm also a previous poster. Because this is a message board and a person's tone and intent are not interpreted the same way by everyone, may I offer a little advice? (And it is okay not to take it, I am sincerely just trying to be nice.)

When you post a question like this and are looking for more than harsh reaction, give us a little more to go on. I think if you had explained more about why you were asking, you would have gotten much more of a helpful, positive response on this board. Most of us are not looking for a fight, we are trying to be helpful.

Sometimes we all mean well, but our words are often interpreted differently than we mean them. You have a sincere question and obviously were looking not to throw a grenade, but to get some honest advice and probably find some people who might be in the same boat. But without a little more information - which you eventually posted - most of us jumped to the conclusion that you were picking a fight. Personally, my husband and I are scared and sad and on the defensive, and yet we are excited and positive about the possibility that science and health care professionals can help us with a situation that has no rhyme or reason.

I wish you the best of luck and urge to continue using this board...it really can be very helpful, positive, and rewarding.

[Anonymous]

PP you're right I will be more careful in my questions, but even though I didn't approach this well I have come away with positive advice and a good feeling from those in the same boat. I wish you the best in your pursuit of parenthood.

[Anonymous]

" i'm realizing through this board that ivf is pretty contraversial"

I don't think the board is that controversial, but there has been someone posting some nasty things about fertility treatments and, as you said, there are many people who are sensitive about that.