Help me figure out how to work from home with a toddler

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is completely unrealistic and not fair to your child. Get a sitter.

I know tons of people who only have childcare until nap time. A 2-3 hour nap and screen time would totally work for most 2 year olds. Op is more worried about the time in the evenings when she does have childcare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that for the weekdays you need a sitter or mother’s helper. You can try to time naps so that toddler goes down at 12:45 and then get a teen from the neighborhood to take him to the library or park or play quietly with him from 2:30-5:30.

As for soundproofing, I would put padding or bubble wrap on the walls and door, cover the crack under the door and set up a white noise machine. Also try using a headset with a microphone so that it is picking up sound right near your face and gets less of the ambient noise.

But I agree that there is no way a toddler won’t require time and attention for 3 hours, let alone be quiet that long. Could you find an afternoon preschool 3 days per week?

Op. I haven't heard of afternoon preschools? Unfortunately my salary is very low. Childcare would be all of my paycheck. I am not sure if it makes sense to work but I really do not like being a stay at home mom.

You may not make much at first after paying for childcare. But you'll be building a resume, and childcare costs will go down over time (unless you have a second child, of course). Is it worth it to you to take the job if only to put yourself in a better position for a good job in 2-3 years?

You could try a teenage mother's helper for the three days a week, from 2pm-5:30. Put the toddler down for nap just before you have to start work. Have the helper show up during nap time, and entertain the kids from wake-up until DH gets home. Then DH takes the child until bedtime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This doesn't seem feasible. My son dropped his nap right around your kid's age. What are you going to do if that happens?

Op. I don't know but my schedule can change in 3 months. My son will most likely go to preschool and it could possibly start next spring if they have a spot. I am no longer in DC. Childcare/ daycare is easier to find here. Right now my son takes a 2-3 hour solid nap every day. He sometimes naps for 4 hours.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is completely unrealistic and not fair to your child. Get a sitter.

I know tons of people who only have childcare until nap time. A 2-3 hour nap and screen time would totally work for most 2 year olds. Op is more worried about the time in the evenings when she does have childcare.

No it wouldn't and I have an easy 2 year old. She'd cry from loneliness. After 5:30 her dh could obviously take the toddler out- that's the easy part.

What if OP's dh went to work at 6am or so and got home earlier?

[Anonymous]

Look for teens in your neighborhood. The real issue would be only about 3 hours. Even a 13yo could feed him a snack and supervise him watching tv. A responsible 16yo could take him out to a local park or library or even just let him ride a trike or scooter in the hallways for an hour. You say childcare would be all of your paycheck but if he is reliably napping then for now at least you could make do with 3 hours of childcare 2:30-5:30, and a young sitter in your neighborhood would likely not cost more than $10-12 a hour, so $36 per day MWF and only $432 per month. If you can swing that then you can handle this pretty well until his nap drops but at that point at least you’d have recent work history and could search for something with more pay.

You could also look for a SAHM in your neighborhood who might be willing to take him from right after nap-5:30 when DH gets home. The downside would be that you’d have to get him up from nap and walk him there in the middle of your work hours or you’d have to drop him off before 1 and pay for more time, but if that worked then you’r have quiet for that whole time. If the noise turns into a big issue, you could look for a SAHM who was willing to let him hang out with her kids from 12:30-5:30 three days per week (providing you with quiet), and have dinner packed for him to eat with DH those days so that DH can pick us DS, change his clothes quickly and grab a bag that you prepped with dinner and they can go eat in a park or something and then come back in time for brushing teeth/pjs/stories. You could do bath earlier in the day to streamline things.


You have to be very consistent that you are GONE during that time, too. Don’t let him come in for attention. Lock the door to the bedroom so that he only had access to the main areas of the house. There might be a few fits at first for the sitter but if you are consistent he will adjust.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is completely unrealistic and not fair to your child. Get a sitter.

I know tons of people who only have childcare until nap time. A 2-3 hour nap and screen time would totally work for most 2 year olds. Op is more worried about the time in the evenings when she does have childcare.

If she were talking about an hour, maybe. But even if her kid consistently naps for 2.5 hours every single day, that still only gets you to 4:00. At that point, OP would need to stop work, get toddlerup, change diaper, gove a snack and stsrt a show, then disappear to another room while toddler watches tv for at least 90 minutes without needing any interaction of any kind. Quietly. That is pretty unrealistic.

And you have to think long-term! This is her first job after SAH for a bit. The point of it is to get a foot in the door. If her first reference back in the workforce is a job where she is constantly interrupted and distracted by kid issues, that is not going to set her up for a better job going forward. You have to invest in some childcare, even if it eats into your profits right now, because you need this reference to be glowing!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look for teens in your neighborhood. The real issue would be only about 3 hours. Even a 13yo could feed him a snack and supervise him watching tv. A responsible 16yo could take him out to a local park or library or even just let him ride a trike or scooter in the hallways for an hour. You say childcare would be all of your paycheck but if he is reliably napping then for now at least you could make do with 3 hours of childcare 2:30-5:30, and a young sitter in your neighborhood would likely not cost more than $10-12 a hour, so $36 per day MWF and only $432 per month. If you can swing that then you can handle this pretty well until his nap drops but at that point at least you’d have recent work history and could search for something with more pay.

You could also look for a SAHM in your neighborhood who might be willing to take him from right after nap-5:30 when DH gets home. The downside would be that you’d have to get him up from nap and walk him there in the middle of your work hours or you’d have to drop him off before 1 and pay for more time, but if that worked then you’r have quiet for that whole time. If the noise turns into a big issue, you could look for a SAHM who was willing to let him hang out with her kids from 12:30-5:30 three days per week (providing you with quiet), and have dinner packed for him to eat with DH those days so that DH can pick us DS, change his clothes quickly and grab a bag that you prepped with dinner and they can go eat in a park or something and then come back in time for brushing teeth/pjs/stories. You could do bath earlier in the day to streamline things.


You have to be very consistent that you are GONE during that time, too. Don’t let him come in for attention. Lock the door to the bedroom so that he only had access to the main areas of the house. There might be a few fits at first for the sitter but if you are consistent he will adjust.

Op. I don't know how to find a mother's helper. We live in an apartment community and our neighborhood is the center of most major employers and apartments. Most families live further out. We live in Florida. It's a weird area.

[Anonymous]

Anyone you could arrange a care swap with? You watch their child(ren) on the days you are not working, and they watch for a few hours on the days you are.

[Anonymous]

Does your work know if your “plan?” That would be completely unacceptable at my workplace. All remote employees must have proof of childcare.

You need a babysitter. It’s not fair to your employer, your husband or your DC.

This is really pretty blatant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone you could arrange a care swap with? You watch their child(ren) on the days you are not working, and they watch for a few hours on the days you are.

Op. Yes. A close friend who is a stay at home mom has offered to help but she doesn't want compensation. I know she would agree to do it because she wants her daughter to have a friend. She's stuck at home all day because her dh takes the car to work. I don't think she would agree to a childcare swap though. Her daughter is extremely attached. I could offer to let her borrow my car and do childcare from her house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does your work know if your “plan?” That would be completely unacceptable at my workplace. All remote employees must have proof of childcare.

You need a babysitter. It’s not fair to your employer, your husband or your DC.

This is really pretty blatant.

Op. My job pays very little. They do not have a child care policy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This doesn't seem feasible. My son dropped his nap right around your kid's age. What are you going to do if that happens?

NP here, at least OP's child might go to sleep for the night earlier once that happens. OP what time does your toddler wake up in the morning?

OP the afternoon childcare market is tight because it includes all the families who dropped their daycare or full time nannies after their kids hit school age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look for teens in your neighborhood. The real issue would be only about 3 hours. Even a 13yo could feed him a snack and supervise him watching tv. A responsible 16yo could take him out to a local park or library or even just let him ride a trike or scooter in the hallways for an hour. You say childcare would be all of your paycheck but if he is reliably napping then for now at least you could make do with 3 hours of childcare 2:30-5:30, and a young sitter in your neighborhood would likely not cost more than $10-12 a hour, so $36 per day MWF and only $432 per month. If you can swing that then you can handle this pretty well until his nap drops but at that point at least you’d have recent work history and could search for something with more pay.

You could also look for a SAHM in your neighborhood who might be willing to take him from right after nap-5:30 when DH gets home. The downside would be that you’d have to get him up from nap and walk him there in the middle of your work hours or you’d have to drop him off before 1 and pay for more time, but if that worked then you’r have quiet for that whole time. If the noise turns into a big issue, you could look for a SAHM who was willing to let him hang out with her kids from 12:30-5:30 three days per week (providing you with quiet), and have dinner packed for him to eat with DH those days so that DH can pick us DS, change his clothes quickly and grab a bag that you prepped with dinner and they can go eat in a park or something and then come back in time for brushing teeth/pjs/stories. You could do bath earlier in the day to streamline things.


You have to be very consistent that you are GONE during that time, too. Don’t let him come in for attention. Lock the door to the bedroom so that he only had access to the main areas of the house. There might be a few fits at first for the sitter but if you are consistent he will adjust.

Op. I don't know how to find a mother's helper. We live in an apartment community and our neighborhood is the center of most major employers and apartments. Most families live further out. We live in Florida. It's a weird area.

Print out an add that you are looking for a babysitter and post it in local bulletin boards, on the parking garage or office area of your apartment, etc. ypu could also post in local teen centers and call local churches that have youth programs or local girl scouts or other organizations that might have some teen girls who live close to you. Mother’s helper is pretty much a babysitter that is younger and might need a bit more supervision.

If your friend is willing to take your son for the afternoon those few days it might be a good deal for you all. I would be hesitant to have someone else drive my car unless I knew they were insured under a policy I was comfortable with, but you could offer to drive her tp the grocery store or target or something in the morning once a week, and tou could do other things to make it worth her while, such as sending a premade dinner with your son that she just has to reheat for herself and both kids. A little more work but cheaper than childcare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This doesn't seem feasible. My son dropped his nap right around your kid's age. What are you going to do if that happens?

NP here, at least OP's child might go to sleep for the night earlier once that happens. OP what time does your toddler wake up in the morning?

OP the afternoon childcare market is tight because it includes all the families who dropped their daycare or full time nannies after their kids hit school age.

He usually wakes up at 8:30 am. We go to a parent children sort of Montessori School in the mornings for 3 hours. He always falls asleep on the way home. I am feeling a bit discouraged about making this work. I really want to work but my entire salary would be going towards childcare. I could easily get the same job when my son starts preschool. Preschool is free in Florida starting at age 4. The extended day childcare would be cheap. My position is customer service representative. It pays the same as a nanny salary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This doesn't seem feasible. My son dropped his nap right around your kid's age. What are you going to do if that happens?

NP here, at least OP's child might go to sleep for the night earlier once that happens. OP what time does your toddler wake up in the morning?

OP the afternoon childcare market is tight because it includes all the families who dropped their daycare or full time nannies after their kids hit school age.

He usually wakes up at 8:30 am. We go to a parent children sort of Montessori School in the mornings for 3 hours. He always falls asleep on the way home. I am feeling a bit discouraged about making this work. I really want to work but my entire salary would be going towards childcare. I could easily get the same job when my son starts preschool. Preschool is free in Florida starting at age 4. The extended day childcare would be cheap. My position is customer service representative. It pays the same as a nanny salary.

If your salary is crap I would stay home until your child is in school.