Child won’t eat in school

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP. are you a teacher?


I am a paraprofessional. I spent all day everyday with this kid, and I and others did whatever we could to get him to eat, but ultimately he would not. A few bites here and there, just to please us, but basically he could not tolerate eating at school, mostly medication related. So in the end we had to accept that he would do his eating at home. And like I said, he was fine healthwise. Actually, more than fine.


Op, a para professional in public schools gets a weeks worth of "training."

Please see a professional and consider an anti anxiety medication. My kid has gone through this and it only got worse with time. You may need to have it incorporated into an IEP at some point if it gets worse.


I am the para in question and I not only have many years of experience but I am qualified to be a teacher, I just choose not to be one. However, I will agree with you that most of the paras in my school district receive little training and have few relevant qualifications.

I will also say that over the years I have seen kids throw their entire lunch in the trash, usually it's one that was bought not carried from home. It seems to me that if those parents could be bothered to pack a lunch with a few things they know their kid likes that situation could be avoided. I know of one kid from a few years ago who literally had hundreds of dollars on his lunch account and threw the lunch away uneaten everyday.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP. are you a teacher?


I am a paraprofessional. I spent all day everyday with this kid, and I and others did whatever we could to get him to eat, but ultimately he would not. A few bites here and there, just to please us, but basically he could not tolerate eating at school, mostly medication related. So in the end we had to accept that he would do his eating at home. And like I said, he was fine healthwise. Actually, more than fine.


Op, a para professional in public schools gets a weeks worth of "training."

Please see a professional and consider an anti anxiety medication. My kid has gone through this and it only got worse with time. You may need to have it incorporated into an IEP at some point if it gets worse.


I am the para in question and I not only have many years of experience but I am qualified to be a teacher, I just choose not to be one. However, I will agree with you that most of the paras in my school district receive little training and have few relevant qualifications.

I will also say that over the years I have seen kids throw their entire lunch in the trash, usually it's one that was bought not carried from home. It seems to me that if those parents could be bothered to pack a lunch with a few things they know their kid likes that situation could be avoided. I know of one kid from a few years ago who literally had hundreds of dollars on his lunch account and threw the lunch away uneaten everyday.


I don't care if you're a teacher. This could be OCD and will probably only get worse. A kid can't learn if they are hungry. You need to see a professional op.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP. are you a teacher?


I am a paraprofessional. I spent all day everyday with this kid, and I and others did whatever we could to get him to eat, but ultimately he would not. A few bites here and there, just to please us, but basically he could not tolerate eating at school, mostly medication related. So in the end we had to accept that he would do his eating at home. And like I said, he was fine healthwise. Actually, more than fine.


There's a huge difference between a kid whose appetite is suppressed because of medication and a kid whose anxiety prevents him from eating.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP. are you a teacher?


I am a paraprofessional. I spent all day everyday with this kid, and I and others did whatever we could to get him to eat, but ultimately he would not. A few bites here and there, just to please us, but basically he could not tolerate eating at school, mostly medication related. So in the end we had to accept that he would do his eating at home. And like I said, he was fine healthwise. Actually, more than fine.


There's a huge difference between a kid whose appetite is suppressed because of medication and a kid whose anxiety prevents him from eating.


+a million
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP. are you a teacher?


I am a paraprofessional. I spent all day everyday with this kid, and I and others did whatever we could to get him to eat, but ultimately he would not. A few bites here and there, just to please us, but basically he could not tolerate eating at school, mostly medication related. So in the end we had to accept that he would do his eating at home. And like I said, he was fine healthwise. Actually, more than fine.


There's a huge difference between a kid whose appetite is suppressed because of medication and a kid whose anxiety prevents him from eating.


I believe PP's point was that eating no food at school will not harm a child's health. It is not that uncommon.
Anonymous
Do you know why, OP? My youngest had a hard time with how loud the cafeteria was in K - once we figured that out, school let him eat in a quieter space and that helped some. I made sure to feed him as big a breakfast as I could and a snack as soon as he got home.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP. are you a teacher?


I am a paraprofessional. I spent all day everyday with this kid, and I and others did whatever we could to get him to eat, but ultimately he would not. A few bites here and there, just to please us, but basically he could not tolerate eating at school, mostly medication related. So in the end we had to accept that he would do his eating at home. And like I said, he was fine healthwise. Actually, more than fine.


There's a huge difference between a kid whose appetite is suppressed because of medication and a kid whose anxiety prevents him from eating.


I believe PP's point was that eating no food at school will not harm a child's health. It is not that uncommon.


Will he starve? No. Will he be more cranky and prone to behavioral outbursts? Possibly.

The key is to understand why. If it's anxiety, it needs to be adressed.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP. are you a teacher?


I am a paraprofessional. I spent all day everyday with this kid, and I and others did whatever we could to get him to eat, but ultimately he would not. A few bites here and there, just to please us, but basically he could not tolerate eating at school, mostly medication related. So in the end we had to accept that he would do his eating at home. And like I said, he was fine healthwise. Actually, more than fine.


Op, a para professional in public schools gets a weeks worth of "training."

Please see a professional and consider an anti anxiety medication. My kid has gone through this and it only got worse with time. You may need to have it incorporated into an IEP at some point if it gets worse.


I've learned so much from my DD's paraprofessionals, who are often more skilled than teachers when it comes to Daily Living Skills for special needs kids. Incorporating a task into an IEP does nothing if there isn't a skilled para to carry it out. Do you think magical fairies execute the IEP?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP. are you a teacher?


I am a paraprofessional. I spent all day everyday with this kid, and I and others did whatever we could to get him to eat, but ultimately he would not. A few bites here and there, just to please us, but basically he could not tolerate eating at school, mostly medication related. So in the end we had to accept that he would do his eating at home. And like I said, he was fine healthwise. Actually, more than fine.


Op, a para professional in public schools gets a weeks worth of "training."

Please see a professional and consider an anti anxiety medication. My kid has gone through this and it only got worse with time. You may need to have it incorporated into an IEP at some point if it gets worse.


I am the para in question and I not only have many years of experience but I am qualified to be a teacher, I just choose not to be one. However, I will agree with you that most of the paras in my school district receive little training and have few relevant qualifications.

I will also say that over the years I have seen kids throw their entire lunch in the trash, usually it's one that was bought not carried from home. It seems to me that if those parents could be bothered to pack a lunch with a few things they know their kid likes that situation could be avoided. I know of one kid from a few years ago who literally had hundreds of dollars on his lunch account and threw the lunch away uneaten everyday.


I don't care if you're a teacher. This could be OCD and will probably only get worse. A kid can't learn if they are hungry. You need to see a professional op.


DP here. Do you really believe that a kid who ate a breakfast and two more meals after school at home will be hungry? I am not from US, but when I grow up, not too many kids ate school lunches (they were bad) and no one would bring lunch from home (maybe an apple). Everyone one were able to learn and most of us grew up healthy.


OP, have you tried just to ignore it completely? I would continue to pack something small, in case if he changes his mind one day, but would not concentrate his attention on food at all. Feed him with breakfast, and then he can eat lunch at home.
Anonymous
Hi OP -- I went through this with my child. This started at age 2 in daycare. He would go all day from drop off until pick-up without eating anything! He turned out to have serious anxiety, sensory and some other things that eventually led to an IEP.

I think that the teacher and para are on target about trying some things first before you assume the worse. My child still has difficulty eating during lunch. I think he feels rushed and that leads to anxiety. So, putting fewer things in the lunch box helps. Also, putting favorite things in there helps.

I also do a walk-through of the lunch box in the AM so my child knows what's in there and gets a bit excited about the yummies I included.

Other PPs are correct that he won't starve, but no mom wants to think of their child being hungry during the day when they should be focused on learning and building friendships and learning to love school. Being hungry does not equal loving school.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP. are you a teacher?


I am a paraprofessional. I spent all day everyday with this kid, and I and others did whatever we could to get him to eat, but ultimately he would not. A few bites here and there, just to please us, but basically he could not tolerate eating at school, mostly medication related. So in the end we had to accept that he would do his eating at home. And like I said, he was fine healthwise. Actually, more than fine.


Op, a para professional in public schools gets a weeks worth of "training."

Please see a professional and consider an anti anxiety medication. My kid has gone through this and it only got worse with time. You may need to have it incorporated into an IEP at some point if it gets worse.


I am the para in question and I not only have many years of experience but I am qualified to be a teacher, I just choose not to be one. However, I will agree with you that most of the paras in my school district receive little training and have few relevant qualifications.

I will also say that over the years I have seen kids throw their entire lunch in the trash, usually it's one that was bought not carried from home. It seems to me that if those parents could be bothered to pack a lunch with a few things they know their kid likes that situation could be avoided. I know of one kid from a few years ago who literally had hundreds of dollars on his lunch account and threw the lunch away uneaten everyday.


I don't care if you're a teacher. This could be OCD and will probably only get worse. A kid can't learn if they are hungry. You need to see a professional op.


DP here. Do you really believe that a kid who ate a breakfast and two more meals after school at home will be hungry? I am not from US, but when I grow up, not too many kids ate school lunches (they were bad) and no one would bring lunch from home (maybe an apple). Everyone one were able to learn and most of us grew up healthy.


OP, have you tried just to ignore it completely? I would continue to pack something small, in case if he changes his mind one day, but would not concentrate his attention on food at all. Feed him with breakfast, and then he can eat lunch at home.


The lunches at your school weren't the only thing that was bad.

Your problem is Not that your kid isn't eating lunch at school.

Your problem is that your child is suffering from extreme social anxiety that will not "go away" on its own and that will probably get worse.

You need to fing a psychologist in your area who treats children for anxiety.
Anonymous
Wow I am shocked that so many pp's go right to anxiety and needs meds and doctors.

My DD didn't eat at school mostly because she was too excited! I thought the para-professional had the best advice to start.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Wow I am shocked that so many pp's go right to anxiety and needs meds and doctors.

My DD didn't eat at school mostly because she was too excited! I thought the para-professional had the best advice to start.


+1

My DS bottled up all of his chatting for lunch and recess. He was too busy connecting with friends to eat more than a bite or two.

Smoothies helped because it was easier for him to grab a sip than a bite.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Wow I am shocked that so many pp's go right to anxiety and needs meds and doctors.

My DD didn't eat at school mostly because she was too excited! I thought the para-professional had the best advice to start.


The op asked if we had kids like this. We’re telling op to figure out why and if it’s anxiety related, you can’t just ignore it b/c it often gets worse and won’t confine itself just to school. Most kids with SN aren’t such social butterflies that they just forget to eat. Imagine a kid hitting puberty and refusing to eat. Yes, this is more of a health issue.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Wow I am shocked that so many pp's go right to anxiety and needs meds and doctors.

My DD didn't eat at school mostly because she was too excited! I thought the para-professional had the best advice to start.


Because this is the SNs board AND OP said she they "managed" last year and she is "worried sick" about this year, I'm pretty sure we are safe assuming that this is not a kid who is too excited to eat. Also, let's not make therapy some last resort intervention. All kids (and adults) can benefit from learning how to manage anxiety and difficult situations.
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