What is the proper response to a failing grade?

[Anonymous]

Grades come before everything else. No outside activities until grades come up. No phone or internet access after 7:00. If internet is needed for schoolwork, it gets done in a public space like the kitchen table, and you check the browser history.

Contact the teachers to find out what’s going on. Email to request a phone conversation. If this embarrasses your daughter, so what; it’s another consequence. If your daughter is having organizational issues or time management issues, you can find out now and help her.

[Anonymous]

OP, seems like your DD doesn't actually know what to do in this situation and you need to help her figure it out. You can't punish someone into doing something if they don't know how.

I suspect this is what's going on. Your DD has dug herself into an academic hole and she doesn't know how to get out of it. My DS does the same thing. In my DS' case, it's exacerbated by ADHD/anxiety - they aren't excuses but additional explanations for how he got where he is (this has been a recurring issue since 8th grade, he's now in 10th and it's getting, somewhat, better). We initially start by checking the online grade book once a week. We didn't used to 'care' what grades were as long as kids are doing their best. Homework, for us, in MS/HS is not optional. We've seen that when homework is done, our kids consistently get A/Bs. When homework is missing, no cell phone/video games until the homework is turned in and a grade recorded. When grades fall to a C, no video games. Any D/Fs, no cell phone/video games until grades are up.

When it appears my kid is in an academic hole, I have him email his teachers to find out what days he can stay after school with the teacher for assistance (or to re-take a test). He does this for as long as it takes for his work to be completed and his grades to rise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 15 yo DD is failing two classes. I have been checking on her grades the the MyMCPS portal. She says that she will talk to the teachers and take care of it. She has been saying this, and her grades continue to decline.

I told her that she could not go to an afterschool this afternoon, and she is very upset with me.

I want to email her teachers, but I'm not sure what to say.

What would you do?

For starters, OP, I would grow a backbone. Your post reeks of wimpiness.

NP here. stfu, OP is asking for help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I teach HS and I can tell you I received an email from parents over the weekend about this exact issue and it blew me away. It just showed such exemplary parenting.

First, it acknowledged that I and CC'd colleagues are doing amazing and they so appreciate what we have done to help atudent succeed but they have implemented some new things at home they want us to know about. This includes SPECIFIC requirements around getting work done and turning completed assignments with specific consequences if that does not happen. They also said they do not hold us responsible as this is a recurring habit they have let linger too long. They simply asked we support them in holding student accountable and thanked us again for our work.

Simply put, they intervened, held their student accountable, let us know what will happen if certain expectations are not met, and thanked us for our work to help student be successful. Ended with saying everyone else has done their part and now student has to do theirs.

Do something like this/ talk to your kid, make them aware what you expect and what will specifically happen if they don't do it and loop in the teachers.

You sound too flattered by all of this.
Also - what high school kid needs this much specific intervention? Kid doesn’t sound ready for high school - how did that happen?
My kid never needed this much supervision even in elementary school. I worry about this kids’ future.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I teach HS and I can tell you I received an email from parents over the weekend about this exact issue and it blew me away. It just showed such exemplary parenting.

First, it acknowledged that I and CC'd colleagues are doing amazing and they so appreciate what we have done to help atudent succeed but they have implemented some new things at home they want us to know about. This includes SPECIFIC requirements around getting work done and turning completed assignments with specific consequences if that does not happen. They also said they do not hold us responsible as this is a recurring habit they have let linger too long. They simply asked we support them in holding student accountable and thanked us again for our work.

Simply put, they intervened, held their student accountable, let us know what will happen if certain expectations are not met, and thanked us for our work to help student be successful. Ended with saying everyone else has done their part and now student has to do theirs.

Do something like this/ talk to your kid, make them aware what you expect and what will specifically happen if they don't do it and loop in the teachers.

Thank you for writing this - very helpful. - A parent

[Anonymous]

Loss of privileges

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I teach HS and I can tell you I received an email from parents over the weekend about this exact issue and it blew me away. It just showed such exemplary parenting.

First, it acknowledged that I and CC'd colleagues are doing amazing and they so appreciate what we have done to help atudent succeed but they have implemented some new things at home they want us to know about. This includes SPECIFIC requirements around getting work done and turning completed assignments with specific consequences if that does not happen. They also said they do not hold us responsible as this is a recurring habit they have let linger too long. They simply asked we support them in holding student accountable and thanked us again for our work.

Simply put, they intervened, held their student accountable, let us know what will happen if certain expectations are not met, and thanked us for our work to help student be successful. Ended with saying everyone else has done their part and now student has to do theirs.

Do something like this/ talk to your kid, make them aware what you expect and what will specifically happen if they don't do it and loop in the teachers.

You sound too flattered by all of this.
Also - what high school kid needs this much specific intervention? Kid doesn’t sound ready for high school - how did that happen?
My kid never needed this much supervision even in elementary school. I worry about this kids’ future.

I'm sure this is all due to your superior parenting. Oh! How I aspire!