Spouse not accepting 2 year old isn't potty trained

[Anonymous]

huh -- my son pretty much self-trained at 3 and he was the first of his boy friends. but since you've started, i'd keep going.

[sunnyface]

Potty training can be challenging as well as frustrating. I’m wondering if a routine toileting schedule would help? Have you tried using pull-ups instead of diapers? This may allow your child to feel more grown up and independent. I know we used them for my daughter when she was potty training and I do remember her doing pretty well. It was during the night that took the longest! I think any encouragement and praise that you can offer your child while in this process is great. This is a tricky and vulnerable time. He will get it! Keep at it! You are doing a great job!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

We are still prompting him all the time. And most of the time if we ask if he needs to go we get a NO however he also just says no to a lot of things regardless bc of his age. So we make him sit on the potty anyway.

But I feel like, if we are just forcing him to sit on the potty every couple hours, that is not really potty trained...he needs to be able to ask for it and not have accidents. Or are my expectations too high?

This is how is starts for many kids. Spend one weekend tracking pee times, take to the potty every hour, and give rewards. Know you know how long he goes between pees, take to potty on new, informed data. Praise and reward. Prompt verbal request each time and them praise when he starts to verbalized the request and reward unprompted requests.

[Anonymous]

Who is doing the most clean-up? That person gets to decide.

Two is very young for potty training. We started at 2.5 with my boy, which IMO was also too young, and we endured a ton of accidents which could have been much less of a pain had we just waited six months for him to be more ready.

[Anonymous]

OP here again.

DS still wears diapers for night sleeping (he’s in a crib, so necessity) but not for afternoon naps and doesn’t usually have a problem then.

We have not done pull-ups because Oh Crap makes them out to be the devil. I am open to them but spouse is not.

Also FWIW, I am DH and spouse is DW.

[Anonymous]

Potty training isn’t an overnight thing. Stage 1 is where you are and it sucks. Last for a few weeks, but it’s horrible. Then they catch on. If you go back to diapers, you will have a 3.5 year old you are trying to train. Don’t be that parent.

[Anonymous]

Reread the the book. It discusses all of the concerns you mentioned.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here again.

DS still wears diapers for night sleeping (he’s in a crib, so necessity) but not for afternoon naps and doesn’t usually have a problem then.

We have not done pull-ups because Oh Crap makes them out to be the devil. I am open to them but spouse is not.

Also FWIW, I am DH and spouse is DW.

DH you must must must follow the book. It specifically addresses that the parent must not have doubts that your child is capable about using the potty. It also discusses how waiting for a child to ask about the potty is the same thing as waiting till their ready. Toddlers are never ready, they're sponges that absorb their surroundings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

We are still prompting him all the time. And most of the time if we ask if he needs to go we get a NO however he also just says no to a lot of things regardless bc of his age. So we make him sit on the potty anyway.

But I feel like, if we are just forcing him to sit on the potty every couple hours, that is not really potty trained...he needs to be able to ask for it and not have accidents. Or are my expectations too high?

You need to chill. This is part of the process. Take him on a schedule. Once he stays clean and dry on a schedule, he is "trip trained" (he can hold it in between trips to the potty). That is huge. Initiating will come later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

We are still prompting him all the time. And most of the time if we ask if he needs to go we get a NO however he also just says no to a lot of things regardless bc of his age. So we make him sit on the potty anyway.

But I feel like, if we are just forcing him to sit on the potty every couple hours, that is not really potty trained...he needs to be able to ask for it and not have accidents. Or are my expectations too high?

FIRST you train the kid to go on the potty by putting him on the potty at regular intervals. Once that's down, you start training him to ask when he needs to go. But in my experience the kid asking is a more advanced skill that comes a few months later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

We are still prompting him all the time. And most of the time if we ask if he needs to go we get a NO however he also just says no to a lot of things regardless bc of his age. So we make him sit on the potty anyway.

But I feel like, if we are just forcing him to sit on the potty every couple hours, that is not really potty trained...he needs to be able to ask for it and not have accidents. Or are my expectations too high?

This is how is starts for many kids. Spend one weekend tracking pee times, take to the potty every hour, and give rewards. Know you know how long he goes between pees, take to potty on new, informed data. Praise and reward. Prompt verbal request each time and them praise when he starts to verbalized the request and reward unprompted requests.

Never, ever ask if a child "needs to go"! Rookie mistake!!! Ask if he/she CAN go.

And no, he is not potty trained - he is BEING potty trained.