Divorced men with kids: Would you rather date women with kids, or without?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Either with or without. I am a divorced dad in his early 50s.

Many women my age are "empty nest" or close so they don't want a guy with young children. I don't feel old enough to date empty nest women, and I have no interest in their preretirement lifestyle, so I prefer a woman a bit younger than me (40s) who has school-age kids.

I also date younger women (20s-30s) and I do it knowing if it becomes long-term she will likely want kids and I'm willing to be an "old dad". Lots of older dads on their second families in my UMC neighborhood.

Do you have kids already? And are you really ready to sign up for babies and toddlers in your 50s? Then teenagers in your 60s/70s?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Either with or without. I am a divorced dad in his early 50s.

Many women my age are "empty nest" or close so they don't want a guy with young children. I don't feel old enough to date empty nest women, and I have no interest in their preretirement lifestyle, so I prefer a woman a bit younger than me (40s) who has school-age kids.

I also date younger women (20s-30s) and I do it knowing if it becomes long-term she will likely want kids and I'm willing to be an "old dad". Lots of older dads on their second families in my UMC neighborhood.

I have found that women my age or even in their 40s who never had children to be a little weird, with one or two exceptions.

You actually get dates with women that are 20-30 ? No way

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Either with or without. I am a divorced dad in his early 50s.

Many women my age are "empty nest" or close so they don't want a guy with young children. I don't feel old enough to date empty nest women, and I have no interest in their preretirement lifestyle, so I prefer a woman a bit younger than me (40s) who has school-age kids.

I also date younger women (20s-30s) and I do it knowing if it becomes long-term she will likely want kids and I'm willing to be an "old dad". Lots of older dads on their second families in my UMC neighborhood.

I have found that women my age or even in their 40s who never had children to be a little weird, with one or two exceptions.

You actually get dates with women that are 20-30 ? No way

I dated a guy in his 50s when I was 24. He was nice, loving, but most importantly, rich. He funded my entire lifestyle, introduced me to contacts who helped my career, and gave me good advice. I did ultimately dump him for now-DH, who is only 3 years older than me. As I became more financially stable in my own right, I realized I wanted a man I was actually sexually attracted to and who would have the energy to play with any kids we had.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Schedules are very difficult with two single parents. I write this on an “alone” night while the man I would like to be with is at a kid sport event. I’ll have my kids for the next few days. We are lucky if we see each other twice a week.

That's a very real challenge and one that I'm trying to figure out. I'm late 40s & widowed and parenting takes up almost all of my time. Besides all the emotional issues of whether I'm ready to see someone or if my kids will ever be ready, the basic logistics are that I'd be lucky to come up with one free evening each week. Who knows if I'd even have enough energy to make a coherent conversation. I guess in my situation, finding someone with kids would help in her understanding just how limited my time really is. The reality of my situation is that I probably won't have the mental availability and disposable time for a healthy relationship for several years when my kids are much older. Until then, I guess it will just be occasional dates and . . . ahem . . . short-term relationships.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Either with or without. I am a divorced dad in his early 50s.

Many women my age are "empty nest" or close so they don't want a guy with young children. I don't feel old enough to date empty nest women, and I have no interest in their preretirement lifestyle, so I prefer a woman a bit younger than me (40s) who has school-age kids.

I also date younger women (20s-30s) and I do it knowing if it becomes long-term she will likely want kids and I'm willing to be an "old dad". Lots of older dads on their second families in my UMC neighborhood.

I have found that women my age or even in their 40s who never had children to be a little weird, with one or two exceptions.

You actually get dates with women that are 20-30 ? No way

I dated a guy in his 50s when I was 24. He was nice, loving, but most importantly, rich. He funded my entire lifestyle, introduced me to contacts who helped my career, and gave me good advice. I did ultimately dump him for now-DH, who is only 3 years older than me. As I became more financially stable in my own right, I realized I wanted a man I was actually sexually attracted to and who would have the energy to play with any kids we had.

I'm in my early 50s. Got three kids under 10. I have plenty of energy for them. Any man who is broken and tired in his 50s is that way because he's too lazy to hit the gym.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Either with or without. I am a divorced dad in his early 50s.

Many women my age are "empty nest" or close so they don't want a guy with young children. I don't feel old enough to date empty nest women, and I have no interest in their preretirement lifestyle, so I prefer a woman a bit younger than me (40s) who has school-age kids.

I also date younger women (20s-30s) and I do it knowing if it becomes long-term she will likely want kids and I'm willing to be an "old dad". Lots of older dads on their second families in my UMC neighborhood.

I have found that women my age or even in their 40s who never had children to be a little weird, with one or two exceptions.

You actually get dates with women that are 20-30 ? No way

I dated a guy in his 50s when I was 24. He was nice, loving, but most importantly, rich. He funded my entire lifestyle, introduced me to contacts who helped my career, and gave me good advice. I did ultimately dump him for now-DH, who is only 3 years older than me. As I became more financially stable in my own right, I realized I wanted a man I was actually sexually attracted to and who would have the energy to play with any kids we had.

I'm 42. I have found it easy to date women my own age who are divorced with children and women in their early 20s who don't have family on their radar yet. The 32yo who has never been married wants nothing to do with me.





I'm in my early 50s. Got three kids under 10. I have plenty of energy for them. Any man who is broken and tired in his 50s is that way because he's too lazy to hit the gym.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Either with or without. I am a divorced dad in his early 50s.

Many women my age are "empty nest" or close so they don't want a guy with young children. I don't feel old enough to date empty nest women, and I have no interest in their preretirement lifestyle, so I prefer a woman a bit younger than me (40s) who has school-age kids.

I also date younger women (20s-30s) and I do it knowing if it becomes long-term she will likely want kids and I'm willing to be an "old dad". Lots of older dads on their second families in my UMC neighborhood.

I have found that women my age or even in their 40s who never had children to be a little weird, with one or two exceptions.

You actually get dates with women that are 20-30 ? No way

I dated a guy in his 50s when I was 24. He was nice, loving, but most importantly, rich. He funded my entire lifestyle, introduced me to contacts who helped my career, and gave me good advice. I did ultimately dump him for now-DH, who is only 3 years older than me. As I became more financially stable in my own right, I realized I wanted a man I was actually sexually attracted to and who would have the energy to play with any kids we had.

I'm in my early 50s. Got three kids under 10. I have plenty of energy for them. Any man who is broken and tired in his 50s is that way because he's too lazy to hit the gym.

PP here. My 50-something ex was energetic too, but he had to work on it. Like you, going to the gym was not optional for him and neither was a good night of sleep, coffee in the morning etc. He was very energetic and in shape for a man his age, but an energetic and in shape 50 something-year-old does not compare to even the average late 20 something or early 30 something man who is at the peak of his testosterone levels and youth. You probably don't realize how you have aged no matter how in shape you feel. The difference once I started dating my then-29 year old now-DH was so glaring. Plus, in your 50s, it's only downhill from there. Meanwhile, unless there is a terrible stroke of bad luck, a man in his late 20s or early 30s has not even hit his peak yet.

I think I definitely made the right choice to spend my poor years with an older man who could take care of me and then my building years with a young man who is right on my level physically. Best of all worlds for me and the kids I now have. I would not have left the 50 something-year-old though if I was still broke, lol.

[Anonymous]

10:40, before all the old guys jump in I'll say that you are right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Either with or without. I am a divorced dad in his early 50s.

Many women my age are "empty nest" or close so they don't want a guy with young children. I don't feel old enough to date empty nest women, and I have no interest in their preretirement lifestyle, so I prefer a woman a bit younger than me (40s) who has school-age kids.

I also date younger women (20s-30s) and I do it knowing if it becomes long-term she will likely want kids and I'm willing to be an "old dad". Lots of older dads on their second families in my UMC neighborhood.

Do you have kids already? And are you really ready to sign up for babies and toddlers in your 50s? Then teenagers in your 60s/70s?

I said in the first line that I am a divorced dad. So, yes, yes, and yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Schedules are very difficult with two single parents. I write this on an “alone” night while the man I would like to be with is at a kid sport event. I’ll have my kids for the next few days. We are lucky if we see each other twice a week.

That's a very real challenge and one that I'm trying to figure out. I'm late 40s & widowed and parenting takes up almost all of my time. Besides all the emotional issues of whether I'm ready to see someone or if my kids will ever be ready, the basic logistics are that I'd be lucky to come up with one free evening each week. Who knows if I'd even have enough energy to make a coherent conversation. I guess in my situation, finding someone with kids would help in her understanding just how limited my time really is. The reality of my situation is that I probably won't have the mental availability and disposable time for a healthy relationship for several years when my kids are much older. Until then, I guess it will just be occasional dates and . . . ahem . . . short-term relationships.

So, can I text you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Either with or without. I am a divorced dad in his early 50s.

Many women my age are "empty nest" or close so they don't want a guy with young children. I don't feel old enough to date empty nest women, and I have no interest in their preretirement lifestyle, so I prefer a woman a bit younger than me (40s) who has school-age kids.

I also date younger women (20s-30s) and I do it knowing if it becomes long-term she will likely want kids and I'm willing to be an "old dad". Lots of older dads on their second families in my UMC neighborhood.

I have found that women my age or even in their 40s who never had children to be a little weird, with one or two exceptions.

You actually get dates with women that are 20-30 ? No way

I dated a guy in his 50s when I was 24. He was nice, loving, but most importantly, rich. He funded my entire lifestyle, introduced me to contacts who helped my career, and gave me good advice. I did ultimately dump him for now-DH, who is only 3 years older than me. As I became more financially stable in my own right, I realized I wanted a man I was actually sexually attracted to and who would have the energy to play with any kids we had.

If there is any karma in this Universe, your husband will one day leave you for a younger woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Either with or without. I am a divorced dad in his early 50s.

Many women my age are "empty nest" or close so they don't want a guy with young children. I don't feel old enough to date empty nest women, and I have no interest in their preretirement lifestyle, so I prefer a woman a bit younger than me (40s) who has school-age kids.

I also date younger women (20s-30s) and I do it knowing if it becomes long-term she will likely want kids and I'm willing to be an "old dad". Lots of older dads on their second families in my UMC neighborhood.

I have found that women my age or even in their 40s who never had children to be a little weird, with one or two exceptions.

You actually get dates with women that are 20-30 ? No way

Yes I do, frequently. I am a youthful early-50s but what I bring to the table is that I am an adult man. Seems that the women who have dated me found the guys their age they were dating to be childish and unreliable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Either with or without. I am a divorced dad in his early 50s.

Many women my age are "empty nest" or close so they don't want a guy with young children. I don't feel old enough to date empty nest women, and I have no interest in their preretirement lifestyle, so I prefer a woman a bit younger than me (40s) who has school-age kids.

I also date younger women (20s-30s) and I do it knowing if it becomes long-term she will likely want kids and I'm willing to be an "old dad". Lots of older dads on their second families in my UMC neighborhood.

I have found that women my age or even in their 40s who never had children to be a little weird, with one or two exceptions.

There are lots of women in their early 50s with school aged kids. Date a peer!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Either with or without. I am a divorced dad in his early 50s.

Many women my age are "empty nest" or close so they don't want a guy with young children. I don't feel old enough to date empty nest women, and I have no interest in their preretirement lifestyle, so I prefer a woman a bit younger than me (40s) who has school-age kids.

I also date younger women (20s-30s) and I do it knowing if it becomes long-term she will likely want kids and I'm willing to be an "old dad". Lots of older dads on their second families in my UMC neighborhood.

I have found that women my age or even in their 40s who never had children to be a little weird, with one or two exceptions.

You actually get dates with women that are 20-30 ? No way

I dated a guy in his 50s when I was 24. He was nice, loving, but most importantly, rich. He funded my entire lifestyle, introduced me to contacts who helped my career, and gave me good advice. I did ultimately dump him for now-DH, who is only 3 years older than me. As I became more financially stable in my own right, I realized I wanted a man I was actually sexually attracted to and who would have the energy to play with any kids we had.

If there is any karma in this Universe, your husband will one day leave you for a younger woman.

Er, why?

[Anonymous]

I am about to start dating again at 53 and I have a teen daughter. All my profile searches are for women WITH kids. I want someone who understands the parenting issues and dynamic. I'm also excited about a bigger family if it works out.