Accepted at a top private but now prefer to homeschool

[Anonymous]

And most parents don't have sufficient subject matter knowledge to guide a kid beyond a certain level (or even sufficient understanding of what they do know to teach well at lower levels). So autodidact is a best-case scenario -- the alternative if that the what the kid learns can't exceed what the parent knows.

I agree that schooling isn't for everyone, but OP didn't mention special circumstances (and had found a great private school).

RE comments in the media about homeschooled kids and college. College admissions officers at good schools are seeing a tiny fraction of homeschooled kids not a representative sample. I'm certainly willing to believe that a super-bright, intellectually-oriented kid remains a super-bright intellectually-oriented kid even if home-schooled and that the most successfully home-schooled kids may be more intellectually ambitious and exceptionally well-organized compared to the typical college student. But that's a kid that shouldn't be compared to a typical college student -- that's a kid who should be compared to the super-bright intellectually-oriented kids in the same college class. And admissions officers aren't in a position to make those comparisons.

[Anonymous]

This whole thread raises an interesting question:

What are the core elements of a K-12 education that most correlate to eventual success as an adult? (for this sake, let's define success as "having the skills, knowledge, confidence, character, and resources to be able to pursue the opportunities you desire"

A lot of folks on this board seem to want to limit the factor to only academics/knowledge (National Merit scholars, homeschoolers having more knowledge than others, etc).

It seems to me this myopic focus on the academic side ignores a host of elements/factors that may equally (or even disproportionally) contribute to success. These might include social/emotional intelligence, the ability to influence others, the ability to work with and lead a group of people, the confidence to take risks in unknown situations, an appreciation for diversity and an understanding of how to work best with those from other cultures and backgrounds, etc, etc, etc.

I think school teaches you SO MUCH MORE than just academics. Opportunities to learn social skills and how to be effective in dealing with people (working on teams, leading groups, etc) is a HUGE part of a top school experience that I'm looking for.

[Anonymous]

What's success as an adult?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I think school teaches you SO MUCH MORE than just academics. Opportunities to learn social skills and how to be effective in dealing with people (working on teams, leading groups, etc) is a HUGE part of a top school experience that I'm looking for.

True, social skills and working on teams are very important. But there are people everywhere and any well resourced private school should be able to teach those skills --- why does it need to be a top school? Summer adventure camps which explicitly work on leadership skills can also do this well.

[Anonymous]

14:25 I think most well-rounded college-educated parents could handle homeschooling until upper ES or even Middle School without having to turn to tutors for instruction in their weak areas. I think many of us are smarter than a Fifth Grader. Also, parents who homeschool do not do it all themselves.

[Anonymous]

I prefer my vested interest in my boys as a teacher to any other individual public or private primary school teacher...hands down. It's nice to have options and choice!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:9:43, interesting points but homeschooled students aren't autodidacts, someone is guiding them. Also, what you describe can't possibly occur if a parent homeschools for a few years in the early years. Haven't you all seen the quotes from college admissions folks, saying that homeschool students can blow others out of the water? This was in the NYT several years ago.

School is not for everyone. Just because you don't want to homeschool doesn't mean it can't be a wonderful thing. Plus in an area like DC, students can take classes at the Levine School of Music, which has classes specifically for homeschooled students, etc.

What if the person guiding them isn't really proficient at teaching? Not everyone can teach.

On behalf of educators in public or private settings, I'm thanking you! This is the FIRST time I've seen this written on this forum.

[Anonymous]

As a public high school educator, I can tell you from experience that many homeschooled students (K-8) who entered in 9th grade were at a disadvantage socially and often left.

I know there's the argument that homeschoolers are involved in social settings and often participate in extracurricular activities. But most of these activities are homeschool-based. So these children are not receiving a well-rounded view of humanity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:14:25 I think most well-rounded college-educated parents could handle homeschooling until upper ES or even Middle School without having to turn to tutors for instruction in their weak areas. I think many of us are smarter than a Fifth Grader. Also, parents who homeschool do not do it all themselves.

Well, if that's all it took, you could have 8th graders running elementary school classrooms.

Good teaching not only requires subject matter knowledge that greatly exceeds what you're teaching, it also requires an understanding of how people learn (stages/styles), a repertoire of different techniques for getting the material across, and good diagnostic skills (to figure out what is and isn't working and why and how best to provide the missing pieces). A good teacher isn't following a script, she's responding and she doesn't know in advance what she'll have to respond to (what questions she'll be asked, what mistakes or misunderstandings will have to be addressed).

IME, the average preschooler asks a myriad of questions that the average well-rounded college-educated parent can't answer well (thoroughly, accurately, in an age-appropriate manner). Are you going to blow those questions off, answer them superficially, BS, spend all night researching, or what?

[Anonymous]

15:53 The crack about being smarter than a fifth grader was a joke! I agree with everything you say about teaching. I know some parents who homeschool have these qualities. I have met many teachers who do not. Do you think homeschooling ever makes sense? You seem not to, and I've never known anyone to think it was a bad idea en soi.

[Anonymous]

I guess this all explains why primary and secondary school education (private and public schools) in America is second class, in many respects, to many other countries with less resources! Do they have better private and public school teachers? I respect teachers, as one myself, but I also respect reputable homeschooling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:15:53 The crack about being smarter than a fifth grader was a joke! I agree with everything you say about teaching. I know some parents who homeschool have these qualities. I have met many teachers who do not. Do you think homeschooling ever makes sense? You seem not to, and I've never known anyone to think it was a bad idea en soi.

I don't think it's (just) qualities -- it's a knowledge base. I don't know any individual who could do a better job teaching PreK-8 in virtually every academic subject (I'm assuming here a homeschooling scenario in which arts, sports, and foreign language are outsourced) than a good school would do. It's one of those collectively-we're-smarter-than-any-individual phenomena. (And the collectivity involved in education includes other kids as well as teachers).

So, to me, homeschooling would seem choiceworthy only in exceptional cases and then probably for reasons that aren't primarily academic (medical, social, moral/political).

[Anonymous]

Come on, most teachers in pre-K - 8 have general education degrees. I have not met any that had basic undergraduate or masters degrees in Mathematics and/or Science. On the other hand, I have met a ton of parents with undergraduate, masters and doctoral degrees in Mathematics, the Sciences and professional degrees in Engineering and Medicine. Many still teach, not in Pre-K but at a higher level. Many teachers in private elementary and middle school levels are head coaches for the high school (upper school) athletic teams. Why do you think Mathematics and Science education in Pre-K to 8, with few exceptions, is woefully pathetic in this country? Therefore, homeschooling can be a very viable option for elementary school education. Most elementary curricula can be condensed to 2 to 3 years in the homeschool setting with tons of play and time to spare!!

[Anonymous]

08/27 15:53 seems to be responding to parents who would not be good at teaching their kids. As someone who believes he could be quite good at teaching his kids, I find 08/27 09:43 much more convincing, and that author perfectly articulates why I decided to supplement my kids' schooling instead of trying to school them myself.

One reason to home-school is that the available school cannot provide a good education. That's not OP's situation. Another reason, possibly valid, is that the school could harm the child, perhaps by exposing the child to ideas or an environment that the parent deems unsafe.

Then, I think there are parents who home-school because doing so gives them a sense of purpose, or a sense of control. But educational decisions should be made to benefit the child, not the parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Come on, most teachers in pre-K - 8 have general education degrees. I have not met any that had basic undergraduate or masters degrees in Mathematics and/or Science. On the other hand, I have met a ton of parents with undergraduate, masters and doctoral degrees in Mathematics, the Sciences and professional degrees in Engineering and Medicine. Many still teach, not in Pre-K but at a higher level. Many teachers in private elementary and middle school levels are head coaches for the high school (upper school) athletic teams. Why do you think Mathematics and Science education in Pre-K to 8, with few exceptions, is woefully pathetic in this country? Therefore, homeschooling can be a very viable option for elementary school education. Most elementary curricula can be condensed to 2 to 3 years in the homeschool setting with tons of play and time to spare!!

IME, this is not true for top privates locally (which was OP's alternative) -- my DC's school, for example, has science and math specialists from PreK on. And subject matter knowledge isn't just a function of college education -- that's one of the reasons it make sense to look for schools with experienced teachers. When a teacher has an established focus (e.g. 5th grade humanities) and has taught the subject a few times, she's generally learned a lot more -- both about the topic (good teachers are always on the lookout for new materials, approaches, insights) and about how to teach it. Practice also matters -- most (good/honest) teachers will admit that they weren't very effective their first two years.

By contrast, a homeschooler stays a novice at everything and is spread very thin each year. You'd almost always be in your first or second year with the material (and even when you're in your second year with some material (with a younger kid), you're almost always in your first year with other courses (the older kid). And 2 grades x 6 subjects with half new preps is a ridiculous workload. And it's not as if that's just your first and second year -- that's the next 12+ years. That's before we get to the fact that you're also the cafeteria lady, the bus driver, the custodian, and the parent. With no prep period or colleagues.

The idea that anyone with a Masters in engineering or an MD could teach their kid everything he'd learn in elementary school in 2-3 years is really naive (not to mention arrogant). And it's probably not a proposition many engineers or MDs would endorse, LOL!!