To pay or not to pay?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You pay, unless the bill was really high and it was known your friend was on a tight budget.

But that sucks. She was clearly used.

This, too. I posted earlier advocating paying but I didn't think about this. If the other party ordered caviar and you thought the menu was meatballs well that may merit only partial payment depending on what actually transpired (if there was any communication about it at all or if OP's friend totally abdicated her responsibilities).

[Anonymous]

I think your friend can say "I got the invoice - I sure wish you had talked to me about some of this because this is way beyond my budget. I can contribute X dollars (and X needs to be a real contribution, not some paltry amount). I agree with most of the PPs that the time to speak up was during the planning, but if the planner really went overboard, like more than a reasonable person would expect to spend for this type of party, and your friend had no way of knowing in advance (i.e. friend could have asked about cost of venue, but legitimately might not have anticipated that planner commissioned an ice sculpture) then the friend can push back on the more outlandish expenses.

[Anonymous]

Thanks all, I have definitely encouraged my friend to pay or at a minimum do exactly this, pay all reasonable costs.

[Anonymous]

Is this for real?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is this for real?

Unfortunately, yes.

[Anonymous]

I'm afraid your pal has to pay
It's an expensive way to learn self-assertiveness