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Get therapy.
That's the only solution for this. You said you've been going through some things personally, that can bring on this kind of behavior, it' also a reason for therapy. You are right that this kind of behavior pushes people away. It's also great that you acknowledge this isn't healthy behavior. Make an appointment tomorrow. Just do it. You'll be glad you did. |
| OP here. I don't have health insurance. Hence why therapy isn't an option for me. |
There are therapists who will use a sliding scale (based on the patient's income) when charging for therapy. |
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OP again. I honestly don't know the root of my anxiety. But it seems to be getting worse and it's not only separation anxiety. I've wanted nothing but to stay in bed for the past week. I break down and cry every day about the most mundane things, and sometimes for reasons that I can't explain/put my finger on.
I'm unhappy at my current job (nanny) and our current living situation sucks. Both of these things are not going to be able to change until the end of summer. I'm miserable in all other parts of my life other than my relationship. I think I'm just going through a severe depression spell and being near my bf is the only thing that gives me joy and comfort. We discussed this last night and he agrees that that may be it. He agrees that I should find something that I enjoy doing like a class or hobby to give us both some time away from each other. |
Why dont you have health insurance? That's something you should work on getting. Also, you don't have to have insurance for therapy as pp mentioned there are therapists with sliding scales and even places like women's centers that offer free services. You do have to be willing to look, If you give your general area people might be able to make suggestions of services. But you can't keep going as you are, you deserve to be happier, so please take steps to get help. |
Why can't you change your job until end of summer? Nannies are need all year long and if you are in a bad situation get out. If you don't like being a nanny consider going back to school for training. Hobby is a good idea, but your boyfriend can't be your therapist. You need therapist, aat a minimum you need to speak with your PCP, do you at least have a PCP? |
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You boyfriend is going to leave you. You cannot function like this and it is no way to live. You are suffocating yourself and him. I had agoraphobia, anxiety and depression and cognitive behavioral therapy made a tremendous difference. I am living normally again.
If you had a cancer that was causing you severe pain and would likely kill you without treatment you would probably do whatever it takes to find a good doctor, get insurance and pay for treatment your mental issues right now are thiscancer, they are arguably killing your life. This anxiety May seem comforting and make you feel in control but it isn't your friend. Kick it to the curb. Save yourself. Don't let yourself drown yourself. |
| Hi op. I really admire your honesty. Even on Ana anonymous forum it's hard to be raw and real and I can see you're really struggling with this situation. This sounds a bit like depression to me- crying, wanting to stay in bed. If you can't get to therapy, is there someone you trust that you can talk to? Who will be real with you? This should be someone other than your boyfriend. Wondering if you could get to the library and read up on self care when dealing with depression/anxiety? |
| If your BF is already telling you that you need a hobby, you're in the danger zone. You can keep making excuses for why you won't try to go to therapy or you can lose your boyfriend. Entirely your choice. |