Friendship after 50
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Anonymous
Kids move on and so do the mothers, and neighbors move away, you'll find out. |
Anonymous
Just to let you know, your mom normally takes her Life Alert off when we are having crazy wild sex. If she leaves it on, I can get a black eye because she is moving around so much to get everything she can out of me. In fact, I should get Life Alert as well because I am sure one day having sex with her will kill me. |
Anonymous
| I have taken a more active approach to volunteering since becoming an empty-nester and that has opened the opportunity of more friends who are like me and love to give back. |
Anonymous
I'm 52 and my kids are older teens. Even though the kids may no longer be close, my closest friends are in these two categories. |
Anonymous
| Agree to join activities OP -- book clubs or workout classes, church, dog parks, etc. |
Anonymous
| I am in my 50s but I have some very close friends so I will not be able to speak from my own experience, but both of my parents divorced and moved to different states when they were in their 50s 20 years ago and made wonderful friends in each of their communities. It was really doing what they love to do. For my dad, it was church and AA meetings believe it or not. For my mother it was church and then she joined some sorority group that helped the poor and then from that sorority group card groups,bunco, Book club and other activities is how she met the rest of her friends. But it was really from branching out from that core sorority group. |
Anonymous
| Co-housing can be a wonderful option. Great TED talk on it- https://www.ted.com/talks/grace_kim_how_cohousing_can_make_us_happier_and_live_longer |
Anonymous
| I feel the same, kids are grown, I don!t have the social connections I used to when the kids were at home. It!s lonely for sure. |
Anonymous
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I feel the same way. I volunteer in ways that I think are meaningful. I even play Bunco. I have joined various book groups. I travel. I belong to a Church. I chat with neighbors. I go places on my own. I have some good friends but would like more (and particularly more than have time/resources to do things).
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Anonymous
| when I am old I plan on making lots of new friends and meet new neighbors I will always be close to as soon as I am in the cemetery |
Anonymous
+1 I go hiking around the DC area and regularly run into like minded people. When it's just the two of you, you tend to chat. I'm a loner and so don't progress these contacts into meaningful relationships, but I could if I wanted to. |
Anonymous
Maybe start an activity based meetup for older people? The young people who are new to this area do a lot of meetups to make friends. |
Anonymous
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My advice is to take some time for you and put some focus on your own interests: an art class, a travel series, a poly-sci club....look inward, and then look up and see if there are possible friendships with that shared interest at your meeting or your outing....and develop from there.
I have found that friendships after 50 due to just "shared circumstances" (i.e. we live close, our kids are the same age) tend to be exhausting and not replenishing for me.... |
Anonymous
| Be more pro-active. If you join an activity/group, make an effort to get to know people. Don't wait to be invited for coffee, lunch etc. You initiate. |
Anonymous
| It's hard. Lots of groups don't want volunteers any more, even at church. I volunteer for a six months, then if I feel like I'm just doing busy work I move on. I invite several women to lunch each Tuesday at a restaurant, via text. Some of us come every week now, others drift off. I think we will eventually build a really strong group. |